Ilana Lindenblatt

And did I tell you that my son was called a kike on the basketball court in Riverside Park?

And did I tell you that my son was called a kike on the basketball court in Riverside Park?

Did I tell you my other son went to Times Square with a friend and had a caricature done just because they were goofing around and the picture that was made for them had their faces distorted into those anti-Semitic cartoons of the 1930s with hook noses and beady eyes laughing and carrying bags of money while the Twin Towers burned in the background?

Did I tell you my other son went to Times Square with a friend and had a caricature done just because they were goofing around and the picture that was made for them had their faces distorted into those anti-Semitic cartoons of the 1930s with hook noses and beady eyes laughing and carrying bags of money while the Twin Towers burned in the background?

Do you know they paid for it because they were in such shock? And when my son came home and handed it to me and said, I think something happened, I tried so hard to diminish it.

Do you know they paid for it because they were in such shock? And when my son came home and handed it to me and said, I think something happened, I tried so hard to diminish it.

Can I tell you how I stared at it for an hour, trying to think of whatever plausible thing it could be other than what it was because the tradition, just as long as the one where people hate Jews is the one where Jews try to find a reason to think there's no way the thing that just happened to them happened?

Can I tell you how I stared at it for an hour, trying to think of whatever plausible thing it could be other than what it was because the tradition, just as long as the one where people hate Jews is the one where Jews try to find a reason to think there's no way the thing that just happened to them happened?

And what is it about me that needs to ameliorate or mitigate the sharp, upward, not-gray spike in antisemitism, to think of it as something paranoid people make too big of a deal out of, as if to defend ourselves is embarrassing and tacky? What is it in me that needs me to diminish what is in front of me? Is never again really now? Is it now? Is now when I'm supposed to leave?

And what is it about me that needs to ameliorate or mitigate the sharp, upward, not-gray spike in antisemitism, to think of it as something paranoid people make too big of a deal out of, as if to defend ourselves is embarrassing and tacky? What is it in me that needs me to diminish what is in front of me? Is never again really now? Is it now? Is now when I'm supposed to leave?

But okay, if yes, okay. But where to? And though I do want antisemitism to be punished and banished, how am I supposed to feel comforted by an administration that seems to be invoking it to fight a culture war that has nothing to do with Jews, while at the same time warmly embracing not one, but two guys who recently did the old Sieg Heil in front of large crowds?

But okay, if yes, okay. But where to? And though I do want antisemitism to be punished and banished, how am I supposed to feel comforted by an administration that seems to be invoking it to fight a culture war that has nothing to do with Jews, while at the same time warmly embracing not one, but two guys who recently did the old Sieg Heil in front of large crowds?

Is the actual longest Jewish tradition that we get scapegoated even by the people who are pretending to save us? And is there any way the world can experience economic or political turmoil without deciding to lay it at the feet of the Jews?

Is the actual longest Jewish tradition that we get scapegoated even by the people who are pretending to save us? And is there any way the world can experience economic or political turmoil without deciding to lay it at the feet of the Jews?

And why am I sitting here at a catered event when I maybe should be running through the streets, screaming that the danger is here, that it's happening, that it's over for us, that we lived through this golden age and nobody ever warns you when a golden age is over. Nobody will agree upon the metrics that declare it so. And how about me? How am I supposed to live? That's my real question.

And why am I sitting here at a catered event when I maybe should be running through the streets, screaming that the danger is here, that it's happening, that it's over for us, that we lived through this golden age and nobody ever warns you when a golden age is over. Nobody will agree upon the metrics that declare it so. And how about me? How am I supposed to live? That's my real question.

Maybe my only one. Am I supposed to enjoy the freedom that your survival and my grandparents' survival has afforded me? Was I supposed to have more than these two children in response to the Holocaust? To replace myself and my husband and then replenish the supply of Jewish souls on this earth because the six million stories that were burned in ovens are real and more recent than I realized?

Maybe my only one. Am I supposed to enjoy the freedom that your survival and my grandparents' survival has afforded me? Was I supposed to have more than these two children in response to the Holocaust? To replace myself and my husband and then replenish the supply of Jewish souls on this earth because the six million stories that were burned in ovens are real and more recent than I realized?

Am I supposed to have done more than live and fall in love and have a career and raise my kids and go to the movies and travel and do karaoke and read novels and sometimes watch an entire season of a TV show in one day and sometimes go to a museum and sometimes ride the Central Park Loop on a city bike with my children?

Am I supposed to have done more than live and fall in love and have a career and raise my kids and go to the movies and travel and do karaoke and read novels and sometimes watch an entire season of a TV show in one day and sometimes go to a museum and sometimes ride the Central Park Loop on a city bike with my children?