Jeffrey

Book your getaway now with Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird news stories from around the globe just like everyone else does.

Except we've got a laser.

Those other Paris grannies just don't.

This first Laser Story is out of Pittsburgh.

If you've worked in law enforcement long enough, you may believe that you've seen everything, especially if you work in Florida.

But this criminal in Pennsylvania is a true original.

Oh, really?

A man named Theo Radson allegedly stole a $30,000 full-sized harp last week.

Whoa!

You know, the large musical instrument.

What are you going to do with that?

Like, where's the market to even resell that?

Sneak away and play it.

It's so crazy.

He took it down to the riverbank because it had wheels on it.

And then for some reason, Theo removed his clothes, jumped into the water with the harp, and started struggling in the river.

Yeah, self-explained.

He thought he was a cherub.

Not surprisingly, a few minutes later, the police were called about some idiot drowning in the river holding a large harp.

At first, 911 thought that must be a joke.