Jennifer Wallace

These women also reported feeling like better parents.

Why?

because as caregivers, when we are surrounded by a strong network of support, we've become more resilient, and that resilience ripples out to our kids.

This is not an isolated finding.

Decades of resilience research find that a child's resilience is rooted in the resilience of the adults in their lives.

And adult resilience is rooted on the depth and support of our relationships.

Now, as caregivers, we're often told, put your oxygen mask on first.

But this research revealed something deeper to me.

Friends are the oxygen.

We need one or two or three people in our lives who know us intimately, who can see when we are struggling, and who will reach over and put that oxygen mask on for us.

That is a very different level of support than we normalize in our busy culture today.

But here's how I've come to look at it.

When I don't reach out for help, not only do I deny myself the support I need, I also deny my friend the chance of being a helper, of feeling needed, like she matters to me.

So the next time you hesitate, I hope you'll remember this.

Asking for help isn't weak.

It is an act of generosity.

Now, to matter, it is a very personal experience, but it's also relational, and it has the power to connect our disconnected world.

A wonderful example of this is taking place at the Dutch supermarket chain Jumbo, where they have instituted slow checkout lanes where the cashiers take extra time to chat, especially with elderly customers.

Amazing, right?

This simple fix for loneliness has now been rolled out in nearly 200 locations.