Joy Kahn
speaker
84 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Jun 2025
last heard Jun 2025
Joy Kahn’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And so I think without forgiveness, it makes gratitude something that's more of a platitude. It's something that we just say, but our heart is closed, right? So we're trying, we're trying to get past it. We're trying to bypass the forgiveness, but forgiveness is the key that opens the heart again and says, you're okay now. What happened was difficult. It was true. It was real.
You were potentially the victim of something, you know, in this case, maybe horrendous or horrific, but you're also okay right now because you have an opportunity to heal and to move forward. So it's never about letting anybody off the hook, which we talk about a lot.
As you're saying that, I can just feel it because this is such a deep part of I think all of the work, whether it's ours or anyone holding space, that for us, acceptance has become a powerful way for us to accept the change is actually happening.
So I think when we get to that place where navigating the healing journey, we've had an experience that we are in the process of moving through forgiveness. We're finding peace with, we're wanting to accept, right? Like you said, without proving that, you know, I have to somehow rewrite the story.
I think that can be a place that people get stuck is I have to now reframe the story in a way that makes it different than what it was. And acceptance is really about it happened just as I see it. It happened exactly like that. And I don't have to love it, but it occurred differently. And now it means because I can reflect on it, it's changing.
And so then it creates an opportunity to bring in the relationship with love and say, I'm going to fall in love with the change that moves me through this and into whatever is next. But we then can embrace this relationship with change as the true nature of acceptance, because acceptance is that I'm willing to change. I'm willing to be changed. I'm willing to
Have the divine move through me and change these circumstances, these experiences. So for me, and as we work with our clients, we have been focused on, can you accept that this was temporary? It has moved through your experience and it was what it was. And can we feel deeply any of the grief that sits here with you in this moment? Yes.
And when we can be with what's in this moment, then we can be with... what's moving through you next. For us, these moments are, we look at it on the other side of not what I have to do, but what I get to do.
Right.
It's interesting because we found that we kind of move through these different perceptual doorways as we are awakening. So as we're awakening, we come... with this really big awareness, and then something we accept, and then it's intended to come into the body every time. So there's a flow to it. It's I've become aware of this experience. I'm people pleasing.
I feel like I'm a doormat for everyone. And then we have an acceptance of that. And then like you're saying, we go into this, I have to accept everyone as they are, and somehow just love them and rise above it. Yeah. So then we get into the, you know, what you were talking about, it's kind of like the high vibe tribe. You know, I'll just...
I'll just move my way through this and be in that experience. And yet that's part of the acceptance of, oh, I haven't developed discernment yet. So this same character, this same divine being is showing up and helping me develop that experience. And so everything comes back to the first conversation we had. Everything's awakening us.
And it's so interesting because then taking that and going to the idea of trust, right? So we've been measuring, and in trust we measure. So I think one of the things that really trips people up, or at least in our experience with trust, is that trust is somehow a strategy to ensure that if I trust enough, then nothing will go wrong. Yes.
Right. And trust is something you develop as you're in it. So you're experiencing something and you recognize that I'll always be here for me, no matter the experience. Now we trust, right? So trust isn't, it's going to be perfect. It's going to work out the way I need it to. It's, I'm always going to be there for me, no matter how it works out. Right? That's trust.
I love this conversation because I think it goes back to the essence of how do we really change our world? And we're in a world that really wants the instant gratification. So we can't help it. We're like, how fast can I get to the breakthrough? And it's in that nature that we tend to lean into the relief of a moment. And so we will have an aha about something. We'll chase information.
If only I could figure out what's going on with me, then I'd be free. And so then people find out why. Maybe it was because of something that happened in a past life, or maybe it's something that happened when I was a child. Maybe it happened because of this. And we go back to whatever the awareness is. We have a euphoric breakthrough. It feels amazing.
And then we think, okay, my entire life's going to change now, right?
Oh my gosh, now I totally understand. But the challenge is, and we hear this all the time, and if anybody has heard themselves say this, oh, I know this already. That means you've had a false breakthrough over and over and over again, but you're here trying to get something new because it didn't become a full transformation.
And that full transformation comes really with a step of or a series of inner and outer actions. You've named some of them already in our conversation. I become aware, but then I accept. I accept what part of me didn't have a good experience that brought me to that aha. Can I accept what happened to me? And can I also accept that I can change and I can move beyond that?
And from that, am I willing to allow myself to dream again, to have desires, to let a desire move me into the healing, into whoever it is that I'm becoming along the way? And am I willing to move through that stage of really knowing what I want and making decisions, becoming decisive, becoming discerning? That's the key point, right? Am I going to keep moving forward?
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