Justin Heazlewood

I think I had a hard time having things for myself.

Everything was sort of about looking after mum and I would be sort of more worried about what my friends thought than what I thought about things.

And

It was sort of two forces fighting with each other because I had a real sense of pressure on myself to perform and be this amazing person everyone wanted me to be.

It was a lot going on for a kid who hadn't had a day of therapy in their life and had just come out of this elongated childhood anxiety and trauma episode and now I was sort of entering into...

Super success.

Fame land.

There's a lot going on.

Just manic energy and madness and a sort of bizarre...

Jarvis Cocker, sort of off-brand Jarvis Cocker in a ski suit, strumming away madly, squawking these philosophical sort of lyrics about being in love with Kelly the deli girl or buying a golden gay time and

I was sweating away up there.

I wasn't sure what my costume was supposed to be.

So I grabbed Nan's 1970s ski suit and I was just, I think I needed to feel protected or something from the harsh light of the performance world I was entering into.

Yeah, I mean, essentially, my whole 20s was just spent working, desperately trying to keep fueling the bedroom philosopher rocket ship to wherever it was going.

Yeah, it was pretty wild.

I mean...

By 2009, I think I was trying to do a weekly sketch comedy radio show on RRR while recording an album, while filming some stuff for John Safran's Race Relations.

And then maybe I'd be doing gigs of a night because I needed the money.

I had no concept of taking breaks or self-care.

You know, Nan's voice going, you've got to have a dream.