Kathy

And that has a lot to do with it.

I was going to say, that was just what I was thinking. I'm like, believe me, it was Saturday Night Fever.

You were sneaking in? You were underage? Yes. Okay. I still got served. Okay. Well, absolutely. Well, because they always let the pretty girls in. And the way that I actually know Holly is I knew your grandma before I knew Holly. And I will tell you this. Your mother used to walk in with $5 in her pocket, and she'd leave with $5 in her pocket. She never had to buy a cocktail.

Some things never change. She never had to do anything. And one of the times when we were out, and I have no idea why, but your father came up and asked me to dance. And he was quite the dancer. We had seen him on the floor. We had all commented, all three of us. The three of us meaning your grandma. So when we came off the dance floor, I said, come with me. I have someone I'd like you to meet.

And he's like, really? And I said... Holly, this is Ken. Ken, this is Holly. Go dance your socks off. Basically. Maybe those weren't the exact words. And I pushed her off her barstool. And as they say, the rest is history. That's amazing.

Us, us.

OK, we're going to kick it off with Meg.

I'm here for it. Okay, next we've got Grant. Grant.

Okay, up next, we've got someone coming for you, Pumps. Oh, good. And this is Matt D.

Okay, up next we've got Rome.

I think all three of those examples are attention seeking. Kylie, do we have a last one? We do. We're going to end it with friend of the pod, Robbie, Ken, James.

I do. And I also want to note we're at 12,800. I'm sorry, 11,800. Oh. Why would you do us like that?

I do want to give a good example really quick. Jackie left a five-star review and said, came over here just to leave this review to help you get to 12K. So everyone follow suit with Jackie.

Yep.

I've got a five-star review from Walt's wife titled, Glad I Found You. And she writes, as a 40-something black female from Tennessee... I'm a little wary of white women, but you guys keep me laughing. I walk around all day making a list of things I've had it with. Example, I've had it with people trying to talk to me at the nail salon.

I don't want to know what color you're getting your nails or where you're going on Thanksgiving break. I have earbuds in. Shut the fuck up.

Hello, Ms. Jessica and Meemaw Drag. Meet Curtin at Law. Love y'all. Long time listener. My name's Matt. I'm from Canada. I want to share what I've had it with this week and I think you would agree. probably agree, is that I've had it with Canadians, specifically stupid Canadians, wearing Donald Trump merch in Canada.

Like, not only are you wearing an I look stupid hat that says MAGA on it, but you're in the wrong fucking country. Like, why do you want to tell everyone that you're dumb and out of place when you're wearing political merch for the wrong fucking country. Like go live there. Don't be here. I'm so tired of this global rise of like fascism, right wingness. I'm so tired of it. We're all tired.

Bye.

Yeah.

Yay. Okay. First, we've got Mary Grace.

I was going to say, at one of our live shows, we had a fan who made her own shirt. And it was disgusting. It was curtains made of meat, like raw meat.

And pumps was coming out of it. And I had posted it in a carousel. And we had so many dead serious comments of like, oh, my God, I love your new merch.

There's hope. Okay. Up next, we've got someone with the username Quanah6. Okay.

All right, Kylie. Okay, next we've got Grant D.

I've got a five-star review for you. Excellent. This one is from Shiny and Bright Shades for Most. Five stars. And they write, Finally, a podcast with the same twisted sense of humor I love. Unapologetic honesty, no sugarcoating needed. Amazing, funny, creative two who sound like me and my best friend of 30 years fueled after two margaritas and nine shots of tequila.

I can't help but turn to this escape dealing with a divorce. and managing my own chaotic house with kids and a man challenging two nine-year-old girls in the game of who is more dramatic, petty, and immature. He always wins. But it's nice of him to include them and engage in play. So thank you for being not everyone's cup of tea and my favorite shot of tequila to laugh, giggle, and smile.

Do not stop. And no, I will not play pickleball with you two, but I will keep listening.

Okay, I've got one more five-star review from SaltyPants2 titled, It Just Gets Worse, But... And they write, I still have you two lunatics. I've had it with just about everything this past week, but realize I can still come here and laugh. Kind of like misery loves company. So yeah, thanks for being my ride-or-die podcast during this hellscape period. Caw, fucking caw.

Caw-caw!

100%.

Can I ask you a question? Let's say your son, he wants to get married to this girl. He really likes this girl. The girl is really mega church Christian. And he's like, I'm kind of getting into it too. And he's going to do it for her. Would you step in?

Hellcat.

I have two reviews for you. This one's five stars titled, These Whores Get It. A top-notch team of two inarguably average women being propped up by an overqualified lesbian would recommend. And I did not write that.

It's my favorite. All right.

Okay. The next one is five stars. How pumps help me find a gay triad boyfriend. Yeah. Who knew it would be two washed up southern hags with some of the foulest mouths west of the Mississippi that found me a boyfriend? For the listener who doesn't know, and probably Jen and Pumps, Hinge has, which is a dating app, it has a prompt titled, Favorite Off-Brand LGBT Icon.

So, of course, I put down my favorite lessee, Pumps. Lo and behold, an attractive yet ungodly petty man liked that prom because he's a gay triad. So bada bing, bada boom. And he's going to be my groom hopefully soon. So thank you to the pickleball princess and her bald huskied elderly friend for fighting the good fight and spreading the real agenda, gay agenda.

It's hard for me because I need content. So give me content. Right. Here's the deal on that.

Okay.

Hi, Dave. Thank you. Thanks so much for taking my call. I feel like I could use a group call with all of you all, Rachel, Dave, John, Ken, and Dave. But, Dave, you're like my financial father. I think we're the same age, but I've been listening to you for a long time. So I waited till a day that you were here. So I think I have two main questions. Can we afford to own two homes?

And the second was, if we divorce, what considerations are there for our investment account? So just a tiny bit of background. We're living separately at home. I'm 65. My husband's 67. I travel two to three weeks out of every month to go and help our daughter who lives in a different state with her tiny little ones with another one on the way.

I've gotten involved in a church up there and starting to develop some friendships up there. My daughter and son-in-law, they want me to come as much as I want and to be there with them, but they don't really want to spend time with my husband.

behavioral and emotional immaturity, I think I would say. Is that her dad? It doesn't seem to.

Oh, is that her father? I'm sorry, yes.

She wants it no more than a couple days at a time. She's concerned about him being around the young kids.

Well, I have involved our church and they're tempted to talk to him, but I'd say it's emotional immaturity, spiritual immaturity, relational immaturity, focus on politics and things that just don't matter. Um, and he has asked for forgiveness every time these things happen. What are these things?

Um, trying to think of a real quick example. Um, uh, he doesn't know when to quit. When people say, I don't want to talk about that. He, he won't quit. Um, And I've talked to my pastor about it and he's tried to set up times to talk with him, but he'll, he just says that he will go to counseling, but then it never happened. So we've been living separately in our own home here for about six months.

Yeah.

We've been married for 41 years and maybe I'm not explaining it correctly.

Okay, well, and I've put boundaries around things, and I may have, I think maybe I jumped ahead. This has just been getting progressively worse.

Well, and I hate to correct you there, I really do, but that is not how it's panned out. That's what you told me. Well, yeah, I'm trying to be careful here. Um, because this has been ongoing for years and years and my going there so much has just recently started to pick up because of the need there. I am not running away from my home here and my responsibilities here. And I'm confident of that.

And my pastor's confident. Okay. All right.

Yes. So I'm, you know, deciding our home here is paid off.

Yes, and I have, and I contacted, I have my investment account, the $1.3 million left.

one of the brands and i went to another one of the brands to have because i'm right now 90 10 in stocks and then uh bonds and you don't need to move anything until you decide if it's what's going to be split exactly exactly so right now you need to decide first thing we got to do just add it all up and start talking to a diverse attorney and how much of that's going to be yours how much of it's going to be his because in most states it's down the middle

Right. It's 50-50 here. And he says, my husband says he understands that, I mean, I've managed all that. I've built it. We've done it together. But he said, you know, you deserve more than that. But I said, well, beyond that, we just need to figure out what we're going to do. And they worked out this plan for me with a 50-50 split. But...

with it changing from 90-10 stocks and bonds to 70-30 stocks and bonds. So I had a question for you about that. I was thinking about going with a second company, but they do individual stocks. And I know that that is... Generally, you do not do that.

Yes.

We actually know a guy. That does apps? That face guy. The face photo guy.