Kelsey McKinney
speaker
607 appearances
6 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard Feb 2025
Kelsey McKinney’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
Yes. Like Allegra would go over to her house and gab. Like she had a very good relationship with Allegra's mom. Like they were close in a way that like families who are big and live in the same city can be.
I think you like gossip so much. I think you do. Seeing your aunts and being like, what were you doing in 1985? Okay. It's winter when Grand Aunt Julia dies. It is cold. Everyone is sad. But they are also like, we loved our Grand Aunt Julia. She lived to 99 years old. She had this great full life.
Yes. Yes.
Yes. She dies in Grand Aunt Maria's giant spiral staircase home, which is beautiful in a way. Everyone's doing this stuff that happens after someone's died, right? Like they're telling stories, they're showing photos of them when they were 25 and being like, look how hot she was, right? Like that whole rigmarole.
And one day Allegra's mom is like, hey, will you go with me to do like the funeral arrangements?
And this is a family that like knows how to throw a funeral because there were 11 grand generation people and almost all of those people got married and had kids, right? So they know how to throw a funeral.
So Allegra goes with her mom and she helps her pick a coffin, helps her pick flowers, helps her do the obituary, all the normal stuff. They go to the funeral place and the man at the funeral place is like, I'm so sorry for your loss. And they're like, thank you so much. And they're like, it's okay. You know, like, she lived such a long life. She was almost 100 years old. And the man is like, what?
And they're like, what do you mean, what?
And he's like, well, that is going to be a problem.
Yeah. They're like, what's going to be a problem, man? Like... What do you mean? And he's like, well, the problem is, according to the government records that we have, she was about to turn 94. Wow. Which is much younger than 100.
Mysteries abound.
The thing is, no one in this family knew that this was a controversy, right? Like, they all were like... Grand Aunt Julia is almost 100. And now they have this man in the funeral parlor being like, I don't think so. So Allegra and her mom are like, okay, whatever. Like, we don't care that your government records say 94. Right.
Like, whatever.
She's dead. And the man is like, not whatever. The government documents say one thing and you're saying another. And there are like logistical rules about dying. And we cannot finalize her death certificate until we know how old she was. And Allegra's mom is like, I don't care. This does not matter to me. I want this over with. And the man is like, I'm so sorry. That's not how this works.
You have to get a birth certificate.
No, you cannot. Or at least they weren't allowed to. But the problem is they don't know how she was, right? Like, she's dead. Her parents are long dead. Her siblings are all dead. So there's no one to be like, when is your sister's birthday? Right. So they're like fumbling around in the dark, right? They're like, can we order a new birth certificate for this dead woman who was either 99 or 93?
It's unclear. And because this is a big family and things are moving and a funeral is planned, they are on a time crunch. People are coming from out of town and it takes time to get a birth certificate for someone that old. What do you do here?
Yeah, they know where she was born.
Great idea. Everyone in this family is like, we're looking for evidence now. Like, we are going through the hundreds of drawers in Grand Aunt Maria's house that haven't been opened in decades. And we are looking for anything that is like an official document.
Exactly. They're finding scrapbooks from a million years ago and folders and like tons of receipts that Grand Ambaria just like kept in bags for some reason. And they come up with two pieces of evidence. One is a scrapbook with like a picture of baby Grand Aunt Julia that has the date of her birth written, making her 99 years old.
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