Kevin Ryan

During the ceremony, he used lyrics from Wet Ass Pussy, Let the Bodies Hit the Floor, and a handful of other off-the-wall songs.

For the reception, they had a karaoke machine and open bar, and all the staff was from the local town dive bar down the road.

Okay.

The piece de resistance of Garbagio had to be when they asked me and my lady to be the witnesses on the marriage certificate and when it was time for us to sign, we were led inside to where it was hanging on the fridge with a magnet.

That's where I keep all my good documents.

P.S.

We had to track down the priest who was tripping on mushrooms behind the karaoke stage to get his signature on it as well.

Listen.

Sounds like a fun-ass wedding.

All the other stuff.

You go to most events, someone's going to be on mushrooms.

Well, at least one of it.

You ever want to win at 200 people?

I think mushrooms is always an interesting choice for a wedding.

Too introspective.

A lot of people.

You don't have control.

But that guy, I feel like the officiant of the wedding is doing mushrooms dressed as the Pope.

That's not his first time.

He can handle himself.