Lisa Ireland

If I was sick or if I got myself into any sort of trouble, I needed something, ran out of money while I was backpacking or whatever, it was a friend that I had to count on.

And I think for women, we tend to

place a lot of value on communication.

And so our friendships, I think I started to realise when I was writing the book that our friendships are based a lot on conversations.

In that way, our differences can matter.

So I tell this story, I was talking to someone about this this morning, saying that my husband has still got the same friends that he went to school with,

They've all gone off in different directions.

Their life path, their life choices are completely different, but they still get together every year and go camping and they surf or they fish or whatever.

And while they're there for that week, whatever they've done, had children, chosen to be tradesmen or CEOs or whatever, it doesn't matter in that week.

But I think for women it's slightly different.

We need to connect with our friends and we want to fit in with our friends.

We want to feel understood by our friends and sometimes we'll go to great lengths to achieve that.

Other books that have shaped me, it's funny because I've written this book about toxic friendship in a way, but I spent my childhood and my teen years and even my early 20s reading a lot about strong, powerful, independent heroines.

And I think that's what's really shaped me as a writer.

And when I explore friendship in both my current book and in the previous book,

I'm looking at women who are making independent choices for themselves.

And I mean, in this particular book, these people are trying to get ahead, making the choices that are right for their lives.

And it's pushing them apart.

In the previous book, the people in that book, their life choices were pushing them together.

Yes, The Shape of Us.