Maddie

Like I was like, okay, this is my punishment. Like, Okay, girl. But also I had an interlock in my car. So as soon as I completed the labor detail, I still wasn't done because I still had to have that interlock on my car. And by then I was working at a new restaurant.

Like I was like, okay, this is my punishment. Like, Okay, girl. But also I had an interlock in my car. So as soon as I completed the labor detail, I still wasn't done because I still had to have that interlock on my car. And by then I was working at a new restaurant.

And at this new restaurant, I figured out that if whenever I got to my shift at 3.30, I could have two drinks, chug them, and then be fine by midnight whenever we closed to drive and blow in my interlock again. And so be sober. Like, why am I doing that? Like, what is going on? And there is literally nothing wrong in my life. Like, just an average girl going to school, working two jobs, like...

And at this new restaurant, I figured out that if whenever I got to my shift at 3.30, I could have two drinks, chug them, and then be fine by midnight whenever we closed to drive and blow in my interlock again. And so be sober. Like, why am I doing that? Like, what is going on? And there is literally nothing wrong in my life. Like, just an average girl going to school, working two jobs, like...

Nothing traumatic, like nobody hurt me, nothing happened. I'm just in this state of mind. And I think that's also why it's so confusing for me to look back to is because I don't have that... Oh, well, you know, someone did something to me or, you know, this happened and I did this or, you know, a big traumatic event. Nothing like that happened. So...

Nothing traumatic, like nobody hurt me, nothing happened. I'm just in this state of mind. And I think that's also why it's so confusing for me to look back to is because I don't have that... Oh, well, you know, someone did something to me or, you know, this happened and I did this or, you know, a big traumatic event. Nothing like that happened. So...

And too often it does lead to that spiral. And again, like nothing traumatic happened to me, but I was on a mission to –

And too often it does lead to that spiral. And again, like nothing traumatic happened to me, but I was on a mission to –

And this job, I fell in love with this job because of the people that I worked with. Like, I still to this day talk to some of the people that I used to work with at that job. That's how strong of a bond we all had. It was such a fun environment to be in, but also a dangerous one because drinking was not, you weren't allowed to drink on shift, but pretty much everyone did.

And this job, I fell in love with this job because of the people that I worked with. Like, I still to this day talk to some of the people that I used to work with at that job. That's how strong of a bond we all had. It was such a fun environment to be in, but also a dangerous one because drinking was not, you weren't allowed to drink on shift, but pretty much everyone did.

In fact, there was a bar across the street that was open until two in the morning And sometimes we would like during buyouts and stuff, we would take turns going to the bar and taking shots and coming back. So like it was very common for everyone to drink and stuff. I did end up getting fired from that job. My first time ever getting fired for drinking. And that really, really upset me.

In fact, there was a bar across the street that was open until two in the morning And sometimes we would like during buyouts and stuff, we would take turns going to the bar and taking shots and coming back. So like it was very common for everyone to drink and stuff. I did end up getting fired from that job. My first time ever getting fired for drinking. And that really, really upset me.

And yes, I had gotten the DWI. And yes, that affected me. And yes, I went through the legal system and dealing with all that. But losing something that I had worked so hard for and was making a very steady income at and for drinking is... Just so disappointing in myself. Yeah. You know, with that job, I was also like bartending for charity events.

And yes, I had gotten the DWI. And yes, that affected me. And yes, I went through the legal system and dealing with all that. But losing something that I had worked so hard for and was making a very steady income at and for drinking is... Just so disappointing in myself. Yeah. You know, with that job, I was also like bartending for charity events.

Like I went and competed in this thing called Speed Rack and they raise awareness for breast cancer. And I had placed within the top five for Speed Rack. Like I was good and good at it. And that place is kind of where I grew as a bartender and grew into that profession. And so the day I got fired was I was bartending with a fellow bartender of mine and he was

Like I went and competed in this thing called Speed Rack and they raise awareness for breast cancer. And I had placed within the top five for Speed Rack. Like I was good and good at it. And that place is kind of where I grew as a bartender and grew into that profession. And so the day I got fired was I was bartending with a fellow bartender of mine and he was

is just as bubbly and energetic and loves to serve guests and everything just as much as I do. So I had made us coffees. So I'd put Bailey's, Godiva chocolate, like girl, I was cordial. Like I was going all in on these coffees. Jameson and then the coffee. And I had put them each on the bar And Barrett had chugged his and then I saw a guest sit down. So I was like, I'll chug mine in a minute.

is just as bubbly and energetic and loves to serve guests and everything just as much as I do. So I had made us coffees. So I'd put Bailey's, Godiva chocolate, like girl, I was cordial. Like I was going all in on these coffees. Jameson and then the coffee. And I had put them each on the bar And Barrett had chugged his and then I saw a guest sit down. So I was like, I'll chug mine in a minute.

Greeted the guest, turned around. My drink was gone. I looked at Barrett and Barrett goes, he just took the drink off the bar that was yours. And I don't know where it's at now. And I was like, what do I do? What do I do? And he was like, I don't know. I don't know. He was like, but please don't tell them I was drinking. I was like, bitch. Shut up.

Greeted the guest, turned around. My drink was gone. I looked at Barrett and Barrett goes, he just took the drink off the bar that was yours. And I don't know where it's at now. And I was like, what do I do? What do I do? And he was like, I don't know. I don't know. He was like, but please don't tell them I was drinking. I was like, bitch. Shut up.