Maria McErlane

I would have a family meeting or intervention, discuss the impact it is having on the family and ask for support.

As a united effort, the entire family can set healthy boundaries and let the couple know not to drag everyone into the chaos.

And it is having an impact on everybody, clearly.

It only works for them because they can offload on everybody else.

I mean, it's about boundaries, really and truly, Anonymous.

You have to actually erect those boundaries.

I know it's a bit late because at the moment it's a codependency and you are one of the codependents in keeping this relationship going, keeping them getting back together and posting the lovey-dovey until the next time.

Without that, let's see what happens.

But it's not your responsibility.

It is hard, but I mean, boundaries sometimes are hard.

And if you, if they're doing that in front of you.

Excuse yourself, remove yourself from the situation.

Suddenly gone very hard ass on myself, haven't I?

Claire in North Wales says, you can't help them.

If you could, you wouldn't still be in this position after 10 years.

True.

True.

So here's what you do.

Shrug, prepare non-committal phrases like, I don't know.

Who can say who's right?