Mason

Caleb started praying under his breath.

I'm not proud of how relieved I felt to hear him do it, because it meant he had moved past denial, and in that moment, denial felt like the only thing keeping me from losing my mind.

By late afternoon we realized we were walking in circles, not the kind of circle you notice right away, the kind where you convince yourself every bend is new until you see a distinctive rock again and your stomach drops because you recognize it.

We found the same split cedar twice, we crossed the same shallow streambed again.

The map in my head didn't match the land anymore, and the land felt like it was being rearranged in front of us.

Not dramatically, just enough to keep us from committing to a direction.

Caleb said we should stay put and wait for daylight, and I said if we stayed put it would come close again.

We compromised by pushing toward what we thought was lower ground, chasing the sound of water as if water always leads somewhere.

The light started to bleed out, and the temperature fell fast, and the trees went from green to black in layers.

We were both exhausted, and when you're exhausted you start making deals with yourself.

We started talking about how it might just be a sick animal, how it might be a bear with antlers in our imagination, how we might be scaring ourselves because we'd read too many stories online.

and then the deer stepped onto the trail in front of us it was close ten feet close enough that i could see it had dried blood at the edge of its mouth not fresh crusted close enough that i could smell it wet fur and something sour underneath it didn't bolt it didn't posture

It stood with its head slightly tilted, eyes on Caleb, and then it moved in a way that turned my stomach because it shifted its front legs forward and its shoulders rose like it was trying to stand taller without committing to standing upright.

The shape was wrong for a moment, and then it dropped back down and lunged.

It came at Caleb first, fast and silent, antlers lowered, and Caleb stumbled backward and fell over his pack.

The deer drove into him with the force of an animal that knows how to kill.

And Caleb screamed, and I reacted without thinking, jamming my trekking pole into the side of its neck and pushing as hard as I could.

The pole bent.

The deer jerked its head, and the antlers scraped Caleb's jacket and tore fabric.

caleb rolled and crawled trying to get his feet under him i saw the deer's eye up close and there was nothing wild in it there was focus it turned on me like it had decided i was next what saved us wasn't strength or strategy it was terrain we were on the edge of a steep drop a slope littered with loose rock and dead branches