MatPat (The Game Theorists)

Well, it turns out that American alligators' bodies are approximately 7.3 times the length of their head.

That means our 0.833 meter head would correspond to an alligator that is 6.1 meters long.

That is over 20 feet.

If Linda was that big, she'd be bigger than the largest verified gator ever on record.

By over 4 feet.

Just over the size of the tallest average kindergartner, funnily enough.

But here's the kicker.

We are not the only character that hitches a ride on the Linda Express.

Oh no no no.

Later in the game we see not one, not two, but three children enter Linda's mouth at the same time.

Meaning Linda has to be even bigger than we initially calculated.

If

we assume that all three children are the same size as our protagonist, 20 litres, that means this new beefier, or gatorier, Linda would need to be able to fit a whopping 60 litres of children in her mouth hole.

That's roughly the size of the gas tank in your car.

A gator big enough to hold that in its mouth would need to be an

absolutely gargantuan 8.76 meters or 28.7 feet long.

That's about half the length of a bowling alley.

No thanks, I'll stick to skeeball.

But even that still doesn't represent Linda's true size.

Because at the very end of Kindergarten 3, she manages to fit even more inside of her mouth.