Matthew McConaughey
Appearances
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You know what time he's, you know if he's married, if he's got kids, if he doesn't, what music he listens to, what he's buying, if he's got a dollar in his pocket, goes in 7-Eleven. Yep. You know what this guy's got, right? You know what's in his car. You know what's in his console. Yep. By that line.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You got to earn your moments acting in, in life. You got to earn your moment. Stand up. You got to earn that punchline. Sure. Right. You got to earn that callback. Yeah. Right? If you don't earn it, it lands in like, what are you talking about? Yeah. You got to earn your moments in a performance. I think like in life too. You got to, it's just important to where you're not.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's where you are. If you look, I look at Staying on Days Confused and Wooderson. The last scene we shot, I'm now working three weeks. I'm loving this. People are telling me they think I'm good at it. I'm getting paid $360 a day. I'm going, is this legal? This is great, man. Call me back as much as I can. There's a scene where Wooderson, they've had the night at the field.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I mean, I felt it for decades. probably 15 years, I didn't have the courage to even go try and write it. I mean, I'd been gathering all these journals in a treasure chest and then telling my assistant, you know what? You're going to start logging that stuff. Maybe something's worth sharing one day. And it stayed on micro cassettes.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Now they're going to go get the Aerosmith tickets in Wooderson's car. And he's like, talks to the gang. He goes, all right, man, we're heading out. And he goes to his car, towards his car. And the group stayed there. And I don't remember exactly, but the group stayed where they were. And I returned to the group. And I remember that night feeling like, false move, bullshit.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Wooderson would have never two-stepped. Wooderson would have gone to his car, sat back, cranked it up, put on some tunes, rolled a doobie, and waited for everyone in their own time to come get in his car. I two-stepped. Not a Wooderson move. It's a tad dorky. You know what I mean?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And Wooderson was a guy who just, whatever way he heads, by hook or by crook, if he passes the pot of gold, well, he passed it. Maybe he'll catch it next time around. But he's never going to two-step. And I shouldn't have gone back to that scene. I shouldn't have re-entered that scene.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, I didn't realize it at the time. Getting more screen time, bro. Sure, yeah. Hanging out with a guy. I mean, why not?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
All right, so your first three.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. Dude, and I, yeah, the first one I get, walking in the right bar at the right time, meet a guy named Don Phillips. Four in the morning, he's riding with me in a cab to go drop me off at my apartment. He rolls a dupe, says, you ever done any acting? I said, man, been in a Miller Lite commercial for about that long. More of a modeling job. Well, you might be right.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Come to this address in the morning, pick up the script. Go pick it up. That was three lines in days. That worked out for three weeks. The chainsaw, a masker. I was supposed to play a part of a guy that was like a Romeo to Renee Zellweger's Juliet, where I like ride up on a motorcycle at the beginning, pass the school, black leather helmet, look at her, ride off.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And at the end, after she escapes, pick her up. I go in for that. I've already got my U-Haul packed to go west, young man. It's packed. I've moved out. I'm out of that. I'm not renting a place anymore. I'm going to swing by. It's a one-day job. I go by the production house to go see the director.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And while we're sitting there, and I'm going to shoot like two days, he goes, hey, we haven't been able to cast the main killer, Vilmer, the guy with the mechanical leg who can't find his remote. He drives a tow truck. He goes, you know any male actors in town? I gave him a couple names. And I remember I left, I got to my car, and I'll never forget it, my blue truck, old blue.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I opened the door, and as I was stepping from the sidewalk into the cab, I stopped, and I went, I should go read for that. I shut the door, went back in, said, I want to read for it. He goes, okay, we don't have any actions around here. And I went... And the secretary goes, I'll do it. And he goes, well, man, just, you know, I don't know, see if you can scare the hell out of her.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And the last kicker to get out the door and go see what I had to write something was I asked my wife. If, hey, when I die, I got these books. These are really important to me. I'm looking in there and seeing if something's worth sharing. And she just gave me the bird and said, F you, dude. You go do it. Don't put that on me.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I went to the kitchen and I grabbed a big exercise like serving spoon. And I came back and welded it like it was some knife and went off and it scared the shit out of her. And she drew tears. And after we were over, she was like, that was great. You really scared me. And he goes, you got the part. So all of a sudden I'm working for a month in Pflugerville.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I had to go sleep on a buddy's couch and pull out stuff out of my damn U-Haul for the next month. Then drove out west, which I had days confused. The film would come out, and I had that as a bit of an audition. And then I had the stories in there about feeling needy, feeling like I needed to get an agent.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And that same guy, Don Phillips, who I met in the bar that night, is the one who ate my ass out and said, get the hell out of here. This town will eat you up. They smell needy. get out of here, go off with your buds. And me and Cole and Rory hit Europe for over a month riding motorcycles. Came back, I was ready.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Because I was, I was running out of money, but I was also like, come on, man, I need... And I would have taken those meetings and they'd have been like... He's not as cool as we thought he might have been. Desperation always reads. I would have been trespassing. I was desperate.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, I mean, I'd read the script. I was like, Jake McCants, that's the guy I'd like to, you know. And I go in and I had that meeting, and I did plan it. It's one of those things, those plans that kind of went well. I have to say I've been fortunate a few times where some ideal plans where I'm going to lay down the snafu or the bait that have worked out. Many of them haven't, but this one did.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And after, I remember I was wearing a John Mellencamp sleeveless T-shirt, man. Smoking cigarettes. I'm laying back and he's like, we've agreed. I've got the part of the Klansman. We're all set. And I said, so who's playing the lead of Jake McGann? And he says, I don't know. Who do you think should? I think I should.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It planted a seed, though. And as you read, a lot of things went my way. Sandra Bullock, who was already cast while you were sleeping, really made a lot of money. All of a sudden, I think she could green light a movie. Where when she was cast, I don't think she was able to. John Grisham wouldn't approve my buddy Woody Harrelson. It's crazy. You know why? You hear this crazy stuff, man?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
She was like, get out of here. So I loaded up the truck and headed off to Marford for 20 days with those, which was intimidating. But then when I did turn it in to declare.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So Oliver Stone, remember that time? I don't know if you remember that time. Oliver Stone and John Grisham were having a...
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
battle evidently there was a killing of a farmer in mississippi i think excuse me i don't get the details right and it was a murder by a young man a young woman and they said they were enacting the mickey mallory from natural point killers all right the farmer john grisham's was good friends with John Grissom deconstructs, has approval over the roles. Well, that guy's not playing me.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You know? So odd things opened up, and then the timing was right, and all of a sudden, the movie's going, the last thing to cast is the lead. They got Carly Haley, they got Sam Jackson, they got Sandra, everything's looking good. Well, maybe we'll take a chance on this more relatively unknown guy. And Schumacher does me a real solid. I remember it was either Valentine's Day or Mother's Day.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I can't remember, but it was a Sunday. And they flew me to LA and he said, we're going to shoot in this little studio on Fairfax.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Was it Mother's Day? Yeah. Okay. We're going to shoot. It's a pretty good day to malaprop one or the other. Valentine's, Mother's Day. Love you, Mom. You called your mom that morning. So we go on Fairfax and he says, the reason we're not shooting in a studio is is because no matter how good you do, you're probably not getting this part.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I don't want it to be on your record or resume of try it out and didn't get it. It's not a good way for you to get started in Hollywood.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Now, being a writer. Yeah. It's a big thing. I can't dance around this thing. You can't kind of put lipstick on it and call it a thoroughbred if it's a donkey, right? Yeah, for sure. You put it there. I mean, I felt like it was something. Right. But I didn't know if it was going to translate, if anyone else was going to go. Dude, that's your own pipe dream. Totally. I don't get it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Cool as shit. That is really thoughtful. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. And it worked out. But that was a little, I planted a seed that day that did, I think, help for it to end up to pay off when I was in there and that audition said, I think I should.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. So the best directors say yes. It puts fuel on your fire. Yeah. The best directors, you want the actor, you want the talent to own their stuff. You want them to believe it's their idea. We all want it to feel like it's our idea. Sure. I say one thing when I go and meet directors now, and I just say it a lot. I'm easy to direct. Just don't tell me what to do.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That's great. But I love it when you manipulate me and make me think it's my idea, but it was really yours. I'm quietly going, bravo.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I saw that, but I'm not calling it out. Yeah. But I caught that. I love that. Yeah. Trick me, bro.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's simple. I'm letting you know. I'm easy prey, man. Like a coyote. Tell me to go that way, I'm going to go that way. So just tell me you want me to go the opposite way.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'll fall right into your hands.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Well, to one is a lot of directors... If things are going well and your actors, you know, and it's going, the performances are going well, have the confidence to sit back and go, yep, next. Because we get hot hands sometimes. Yeah. And you don't want a director and you also don't want an actor that's competing for the best idea.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It happens in those, probably in those situations. Some of those green rooms, right? For sure. You know, because I've been around some of those. There's competition for the best idea. And when you've got the hot hand and you've had the best six ideas in a row on a set when you're acting as a director, I want you to have the 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, 12th, 14th, 40th in a row.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You're hot, man. Yeah, go. You're getting me what I want and you're owning it. Let's do it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
If the director will try my way or try the way I want to do it and sincerely go, I see that. Now we try it this way. I'm much more able to go, damn right I will, and I'm going to give this real justice. I'm not worried that it's my idea. We just want the best idea to happen. Sure.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
The other thing is that when you're in a movie, I always say this, the communication with the director is what you do between action and cut. It's not what you say outside of it. Here's what I think we want to do in the scene. All that can be great to get there, but really your communication is what you do between action and cut.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And the best thing that can happen is when you have an idea what you want to do in a scene. You don't say it to anybody. Then you do the scene. And they come back and you go, you know why I love that? Here's what I got from the scene. And they go, pa-pa-pa, pa-pa-pa, pa-pa-pa, pa-pa-pa. And you pull your paper out of your pocket and you go, that's exactly what I wrote.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I wrote down what I wanted to do, what I wanted to hopefully come across. You just said, and there it is. I had written it down beforehand. That's kind of a kismet moment when that can happen. Yeah. So I think no. No, you know, I don't like the word no. Best Directors started off with this with Linkletter. You know, listen, we call it verbal ping pong.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
But it's a forward-moving process. You're figuring out. And he's directing me, redirecting me through the give and the take and the flow of the creative, but never going, no. Not that. Boom. Axles will go, whoa, you just gave me a red light. Yeah. You just stunted my growth. My creativity just stopped. Now anything you tell me to do after this, it's your idea, not mine. Come on, man.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I can operate independently, but I like approval of it. Because there's times where, and I've tried to close these gaps, meaning there's what we intend to do, there's what we actually do, there's what gets recorded, and there's what gets edited. Trying to close all those gaps.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And over 35 years, I have been able to close the gaps where what I'm wanting to do is pretty close to what I'm doing, which is pretty close to what's getting recorded. Hopefully what's going to get edited. Yeah. But sometimes it's not. And I need that director to go, come here. I know what you're trying to do, but come look at it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I'll watch the scene and go, oh, that's not what's coming across. Gotcha. Maybe that's the angle. Maybe that's me. But sometimes there's a larger gap. Here's what I thought I was doing. Maybe it was, but it's not captured. Or maybe what you thought you were doing is not actually what you were doing.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Loves funny. Really? So... And nonverbal. I don't think he gave me any direction that had an English word in it. Really? No. It's musical. Everything's musical.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Musical and funny, and to see his little shoulders start bouncing when he's laughing is just beautiful.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So, you know, I go in, I wrote a lot of extra stuff in that scene in there, and that character had a launchpad line. That character who says to Leonardo's character, when Leonardo says, what's the secret of this business? There was a line written in the script that said, Cocaine and hookers. And I just went, okay, is this guy being funny? Or does he really believe that?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
What if the guy really believes that the secret to this brokering business is cocaine and hookers? We can unpack that and write a book, right? Yeah. Why cocaine? Why hookers? What do all these things do? Which led to, you know, jerking off. And how many times a day? Rookie numbers. Don't want too much travel. Need more bass. All that stuff. Bullshit that I was spewing.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I remember- It was just so funny. It was so fun to do. Thank you. It was super fun to do. And I went in. Sometimes I'll just go like, let's just do it live. I'm going to introduce it on the day. Sometimes I don't have the balls for that. And I'm like, I might want to run this by. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So it was the day before. I said, listen, I've been playing with this scene and extended it, but I think it's like, yeah, we'll do it. And I did it. And I was like, those are the times like you better do it well.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
But you go back and... Watch the same thing. You're watching the same thing.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Because if you don't, they're going to go, no. And you can't bring them back, reel them back in the next day when you're live, right?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So I did it. Well, he was sitting there kind of laughing. And I remember he just goes, did you say the thing about the thing? I went, yes, I did. He goes, did you say the thing about there were two points he wanted to hit? Did you say the other thing about the thing? I said, yeah. He goes, okay, great, do that. And the next day he went out and did it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I tell the story all the time, but we were five takes, got it, moving on. And Leonardo goes, hang on, Marty. And he goes, what's that thing to me? He goes, what's that thing you're doing before the scene? Because I was doing the... And it was a thing I do before scenes in different rhythms to relax. Get myself out of my head. Find the rhythm. You don't want to come in thinking, right?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm stepping into a Scorsese movie. I'm a one-day worker, two-day worker. I got nerves. It helps get rid of anxiety. It also... Helps the crew go, what's the fucking weirdo doing? Which is good. Puts you in an underdog situation. Fight out of it, right?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's a good feeling. So I'm going to, good. They're not sure, so I've got to really make this count. And I sold him. That's what I'm doing it for. He goes, what if you do that in the scene? In the next takes, which is in the movie. That's awesome.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's kind of a compliment. And the way I was talking about the director about, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but how about this? They're stealing. And it's an honor to kind of be stolen from. And you want to steal. And then also still, that was a version of Leonardo giving. That's very giving, yeah. He goes, that thing, I don't know what it is, but this is a wild scene. This is a wild kick.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You put that in. So we just, how it fell in, it fell in. And then he sat over there very easy. I mean, he's playing it. Listen, trying to get on the groove. What's he talking about? Yeah, I think I understand. Or do I? I'm not sure, you know? And a lot of times, yeah, you will have people in that position that may go, dude, I don't like this.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
They will think I'm losing this scene or I'm getting shown up in this scene. Really confident actor's not gonna feel that way. Look, confident actor's gonna go, I've got plenty to do. This is great. Let me put fuel on this fire. This makes the movie better maybe. This is a great scene.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Trying to get from the reason to the rhyme. Because you go study, you prepare. It's reason. You want to know what you're saying. I think words are important. But by the time you show up, you kind of want to hopefully chunk all that shit out of the way and get out. I don't want to get nonverbal now, man. Let's get into the...
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Let's get into the rhyme and let's get into the ether here and get this thing off. Let's levitate.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You were just doing a Speedo ad out there.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Then I hope so. I don't want to, you know.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Astral?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yes.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yes. And some things would go on late night over there.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. I mean, look, every performance I see. I really don't see... I don't think I'm fair about any performances of mine in the movies until about the third or fourth viewing.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, the first viewing, in every film I've ever done, I physically have gotten sick in the parking lot. And I think it's partially... You know, one scene, a full week comes rushing back. Yeah. And I'm like, why did you just take four? Oh, the second half, take eight. I moved that morning. I didn't... Or, you know, so I'm not really laid back watching the story.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I remember this. The little gate had some steps up and it plateaued out and there was this thing. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I remember that. Yeah. I, I, I mean, they played some pretty good music. You could tell it was a good time to have it. I figured it was time to, you know, if I was already feeling corny, to keep the circus going.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, it was. I never knew.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I never got to know that neighbor well.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
The tennis coach probably knows all his stories.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So let me tell you this.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I mean, I honestly... what's in that book I honestly hope he can live through that much or even more if he wants there's stories that are not in that book that are the ones that I are the reason I wear a mouth guard at night because I wake up wake up at the exact second where I go back and I remember and I was like oh I almost died right there none of those that I almost died
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And so those, I've got a few circumstances that I would not want my son to live through. Those, no, man, I mean, look, there's things I made it through. The beauty of ignorance, God bless ignorance. Cheers.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You know? Cheers, here. Yes, man.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So there's things. Oh, that's good. That I survived because I didn't know better, thank goodness. But most of those stories in that book that I went through, I would not go back in my own life and say, ooh, if I could get rid of that, I wouldn't have to do it. And I wouldn't... You know, it's part of... Our kids are living a more affluent life than I was.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That doesn't mean they don't or can't have the experiences that I had. Um... I don't want them to fall under prey to any kind of entitlement. And part of not doing that in life is having to be in situations where you have no safety net. You're like, I've got my own devices, man. How am I going to roll here? How am I getting out? How am I getting what I want? How am I going to survive?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm micromanaging my performance and everybody else's. And I get out of a two-hour screening, I'm sweating. It was a workout.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
How am I not going to go crazy? How am I going to go crazy and out endure the craze? How am I going to go wing it? How am I going to know better? I want my son to be in those situations. And I was in a lot of them. A lot of them. A lot of the success, I engineered. A lot of it, didn't engineer at all. It was divine invention, something I can't make the math of.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Look, you might be right. I'm not going to, I'm not going to, I sure don't think you're wrong. Do I think that's necessary? No. Do I think, do I try as a father and his mother as well to not make things harder? But to go, no, you've got to earn that. I'm not handing that to you. There's initiations and there's rites of passage. You've got to skin your knees.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm not really kicking back watching a movie, but...
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
If you pull it off the first time, bravo. But if you skin your knees a few times on the way, bravo. I'm not giving you the pass to the door. We like to say, look, you're going to get access. More access. You're gonna get more access with us. I have no problem getting you in a door. Right. Once you're in that door, bro, it's on you.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
second third or fourth time i could sit back and watch it it's kind of like watching any coen brothers movie for me and i've never been in a coen brothers movie but my favorite music coen brothers movie is about the fourth time because you pick up all the great genius background stuff yeah yeah had a carrot you know oh the line in raising arizona we are in the proverbial catbird seat i'm my fucking favorite line in any movie didn't catch it until my eighth time watching it and i went to my wife what is that she goes catbird he's on cat birds he's blowing funny shapes that one
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So don't embarrass yourself and handle it and show up on the other side. Let's see where the rubber hits the road. So yeah, they're getting a little quicker access to certain things and say, I did, sure. But we're doing our best to make sure they earn it. Whatever that is, I don't think you got a proverbial bleed to make it count. Trip yourself running downhill when things are going well.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Base plant for the hell of it. It's a great chapter. I still battle with that. So, you know... Confidence to go find shit out. I don't know. I wanted to travel. Travel has been my best educator. I think it's the best. Getting lost. It's the best. Getting found. Meeting strangers and going like, oh, geez, we are all a hell of a lot more similar than I thought.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm a much better traveler than vacationer.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I've still got to learn how to be... My wife tells me I've got to learn how to take a vacation better. Because I have to either... I have to write something or break a sweat or do something in the day to go, okay, cocktail's going to taste better this afternoon. But if it's, I can only, I'm not as good at handling successive Saturdays.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I need to chunk a little bit of Monday in each day just to go, all right, earn that. Here we go. I think it does feel better. Another notch. That's why I love Friday the best. First half, business. Second half, 48-hour runway of freedom.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Like, did you know? It wasn't quite real, but it was real. It's insane.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, that was perfect.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I love you. There's one small problem.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
We're twins.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. It can tear them apart.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
They're not midgets. They're dwarves. Whatever. Or bring them together. This is Gary Oldman, dude. This is Gary Oldman. Patricia Arquette.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Faith Beckintale. He's like, get some of those fucking midgets. Wait. You could have prepared us for this, don't you think? If you embarrass me, I'll never speak to you again, so just get it together.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
How we doing, man? Buddy. Actually, I won most hands in 1988. There's a story in there about how he lost a lawsuit case against this oil of mink when it had the bad acne.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
This is chaos, dude. A walk down the aisle.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Just hope he's smart enough not to screw it up. Is just a beginning.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Trailer. You shot that movie? Yes. Real production. Real production day. Showed up to work. No one thinks that's real. It doesn't look real. It doesn't look real, but damn, that's a good trailer. That goes for it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, the second half dropped into serious melodrama.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Circular's funny.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I have the dwarf gene in me. Yeah. So if you have children, like Kate and I in the films, I was going to like procreate. Good chance.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
If she doesn't know, I'm the biggie in the family, okay? Yeah, yeah. That's actually what we called. There's a chair where they get out of the house. There's like one big chair. It's like, oh, no, that's his. He's the biggie. It's absurd.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, I think he's sitting on his... I think he's sitting on his... His knees? His heels back, and then you had the... Or he had just the green... You wear the green sort of back screen where they... Remove it in post and put there, but I don't know. They had much money to remove most of it in post.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So, I mean, I have that with performances with the book. By the time we had edited down, I will say this. Did you have this experience or that you send something in and you're like, ah, this is hot shit. This chapter's good. This story's great.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, we're playing it... Look, it was obviously a wild concept. Yeah. See the talent it drew. The talent is... It was anarchic. It still had some heart to it, which maybe I think of the script, felt less sentimental than that did. Um... We knew it was a soap opera, but it felt so carny for that word to come back. It felt so carny. We were like, this is wild.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And Matthew Bright, writer, director, was a good writer, had come up with the concept. And I just was like, this is bringing together two worlds of high comedy, but if we straight face this, it can be really funny and also might actually make you drop a tear.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That second half of that trailer... Pushes that direction. I've shown 100 people that trailer. I've never seen the trailer.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Sure. You know what? My biggest dammit for me was probably... Right as we finished Time to Kill. What was the name? Damn it, he just moved on. L.A. Confidential Director.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Anyway, excuse me. We had a meeting, and he'd come down, and he'd offer a role. I don't remember if it was the Guy Pearce role or the Russell role. Curtis Hanson? Curtis Hanson, thank you. Curtis Hanson came down, and it offered me a role in that. And I loved that movie. I think it's a great movie. And... I said no. Now, mind you, at that time, people were asking me what I wanted to do.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm like, things are starting to come in an onslaught. I'm like, it was hard for me to sit down and read a script and go, no, this is really good and I know why. Everything. It was just coming from like, I'll do whatever I can do.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And it's coming and I'm supposed to be, and I'm getting asked, well, which one of the great stuff do you want to do? I'm like, I write about this a lot in the book. I'm going, yesterday, I didn't have a chance. None of these were even on the table. And now you're telling me which one of these you want to do? That's when I packed up and got the hell out of Dodge and went to Peru.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And they go, I don't get it. Yeah. And I puffed up going, how can you not get that? If you don't get that, then you don't get the whole book's about. Sweet.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
But that's a movie that I love, that I would have loved to be a part of, and I love that movie. There's always been a rumor that I think James Cameron started, he and I have had a few laughs about this, that I got offered and turned down the role in Titanic. That did not happen. That did not happen. I did not get offered.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And as I've said to this day, if I did, I got to find that agent because they bogeyed. No, I did read for it. I was there at the end. Kate Winslet and I read. It was a good read. I walked out of there thinking that I may have had it, but I never got the offer. So other than that, not really. Other than L.A. Confidential, which was early on in 96-ish.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I don't, what movies I see, I'm like, ah, oh, that's good. That would've been fun. That would've been fun, yeah. But I didn't, but none that I'm like, ah, I can't believe I, I bogeyed that one or I blew that one or I didn't see that.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, I had a few, but what happened, here's what I learned. Okay. 90% of the time, thankfully I had good editors, I hadn't written it well enough. That was them saying, and then I went back and wrote it better and they're like, oh, I get it. Right. But I went in thinking, you know, sometimes we have our own cliff notes and we don't. Sure. Oh, they're going to get that part. No, you didn't write it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. It was the... I kept having the... The 3 a.m. turmoil. Unable to sleep. Oh, I remember having this line. I was like, no, man, I feel like I'm just an entertainer. I'm not an actor. And I remember my great mentor going, well, first of all, what the fuck's wrong with being an entertainer? It was a great question. Like, are you boohooing that? I was like, oh, you're right.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's not that, just something else is eating at me, man. And again, my life... wildly full at that time. Fall in love with Camilla. She's pregnant with her first child. All I ever wanted to be is a dad and I got one coming, man. I mean, I'm vital, bro. My head and loins and heart and gut are all in sync. My bets, I'm tripling down on them and they're like winning.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
But in my career, I'm going back and doing this thing, romantic comedies, that I had owned that lane at that time. And they were fun and they paid well. But I'm like, they feel like more different, in a wrong kind of vacation from my life. It's like I needed more resistance. In real life, I'm dealing with great drama, great comedy. In work, I'm dealing with, yep. Step right up.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I can knock this out. I can do this tomorrow. Fine. Am I not? Can I dig deeper to find a different? No, these things, these rom-coms have a certain frequency you need to be on. You need to bounce from cloud to cloud to cloud. If you drop the anchor, you can sink them.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, don't go there. And that frequency that those were were just not getting me off. I didn't feel like I was having an experience.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, they let me know, bro, stay in your lane. Stay over there. Really? I'd already done a couple. Tried. Where... If they were in more of the dramatic side or outside of romantic comedy genre, the pay took a major pay cut. And then those didn't do well, box office wise. So they weren't going, please do this again.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Whether you did well or not, Chops, you're leading the charge over here on rom-coms and you're nailing them. They cost us 35. They're coming back at 60. We're making good money and you're good at them and the people like them. Just do that. Nothing wrong with that. Ben loved it. I needed some resistance.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So I self-imposed after many long talks, many late nights, many tears, many prayers, made a pact with my wife. She's great. She's a real baller this way. She was like, okay. I see what this means to you. But do you understand if we're going to do this, again, it's going to get rocky. And there's no going back. It's committed. I was like, yeah, we have to commit the whole way. No flinching.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No two-stepping. No stepping out. Oh, I think I've come back. All right. Day's going to get long. She knows me. That bottle's going to look better earlier in the day. I know you need to accomplish for significance. We're going to have to trust this. And I was like, I'm trusting no matter how long it goes. She goes, it could be dry for a while. And it was. It was dry for a long time.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And all those things did happen. The fact that I've got the looking forward to a son coming. the fact that I'm bored out of my mind, which is a great thing to be, because you've got to work some tools in your nugget that you don't have to work when everything's right there for you.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
The fact that I'm not on the beach in Malibu shirtless and my daily life there looks like turn the page into the romantic comedy that you go see in the theater the next night. They were kind of merged into one at that point when I removed myself. Um... The fact that I was back home, the fact that we had a family, not tragedy, but a big crisis in my family that I need to tend to.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That sobers you up. You know what I mean? Where you get like, that I had things that I knew were more ultimately existentially more important than my acting career. Kind of put that on the side. Go along, got tempted with the $8 million offer that turned into a $14.5 million offer.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
As I talk about not two-stepping, as I said, did I two-step enough to say when it got to 14.5, let me read that sumbitch again? Yes, I did. I ain't that pure. Still said no, though. The fact that saying no to that, do I believe that sent a little invisible lightning bolt through Hollywood going, this fucker's not bluffing. Yeah, he's serious. Who turns that shit down? What's he up to?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Someone does that. You know, a girl in a relationship, whatever. You're like, what are they up to? You kind of become more attractive.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Novel. What are they up to? They got something going on. They're not just, they didn't just step out and waft. They're on a line of something where they're going or what they're holding out for. And that's what I was doing. I was kind of on the picket line. I was kind of holding out.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Mud came. No, Mud came.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
When I was 12, would have come to me and said, hey, buddy, you see this movie, Mud? And I'd have gone, no, sir. And he'd have gone, oh, we got to watch together. It's a good one. Plus, the tree house that I built as a kid that's in that book was my boat in a tree. That was in Mud. The fantasy, the magic reality through a child's eyes.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And then the aristocrat of the heart, the love story that Mud has with Jupiter, Juniper.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I love ketchup. I put ketchup on my ketchup.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Right. I think I fell in love with ketchup first. With the ketchup.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
All in one. And let's admit it. Can we say it online? Can we say it live? Heinz has got the monopoly on fucking ketchup. Get the money out of here, guys.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Whatever not put ketchup on. Scrambled eggs is not crazy.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, my editors did too with me. There's times where... Yeah, there was a lot cut. But once I declared and we kind of put it all together and tried to make it a bit of an interactive play, interrupted by a prescribe or a poem or a picture and had that playfulness and every time I'd get going. Every time I'm preaching something. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. So, I mean, I put it on. We had one throw-up vegetable in our household. We had one vegetable you didn't have to eat. And mine was boiled squash. My mom boiled everything. She was not a good cook. Ma, I know you're out there in 92. You were not a good cook. Boiled squash. And that's how I got it. But you had to eat it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, that was the one, I'm sorry, the one I didn't have to eat, but then you had to eat everything else. So the boiled okra, nobody in the family liked it, but man, that's where ketchup became my favorite because I got to drown that shit.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And I remember sitting there in our family, if you didn't finish it, you finally had to go to bed at dinner time, and then the next morning it was on the breakfast plate. Oh, wow. And if you were late for school, you got the demerit, then it just went back to sort of structure. So now what's your punishment for being late for school? So you're like, oh, man. Ketchup was my friend.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Get over things, to swallow things, and also just to... And it's where the ketchup is. I love ketchup on a burger, but it's best to dip it so the ketchup's the first thing to hit the palate.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. And there's a whole bunch behind him, but he does the intro. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Like on the flight later? On the fucking flight. Just give it a lick? Just a little... Yeah. Just to have a buddy there.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Next time I have ketchup, I'm going to not be able to not think about you licking on your hand.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
My buddy actually, Marcus Stowers, made me a T-shirt, a red T-shirt in white, writing it and said, I put ketchup on my ketchup. Yeah. Heinz the one. Viva la ketchup. Cheers to that.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I don't even know them. No one does. This is how we busted my mom. Mom would always save money. All right, let's go to peanut butter.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. For me, right? Heinz catch up. We'd finish, and we'd come back to dinner, and all of a sudden, next night, you'd be at the inn the night before. And the next night it'd be full. You'd pour it and it'd just pour out of the water. You're like, mom, bullshit. This is not. Yes, it is. And they're like, no, it's not.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And she did the same thing with peanut butter for a while. And we're like, this is not peanut butter pan. This is your local. Yeah, the bullshit knockoff. And we bust her every time on it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Have to come off of that or come in, have to precede that with a story where I eat shit. Yeah. Or so the reader can stomach it. You want to let, you know?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I bet you like, it's the Jamaican prickly, what's that Jamaican? It's a dark sauce like A1. It's Jamaican. Pick a pepper. You like pick a pepper? If you like A1, you probably like pick a pepper.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Asian? More than that English mustard? We have that tight, tight, tight, little white, little teaspoon of that.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Where's Asian mustards between English mustards and wasabi?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You're like, am I fucking breathing through my eyes?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I've been using wasabi pretty liberally lately. I do too. To mix up even with tuna fish salad. I'm a tuna fish salad mastermaker. Really? Yeah. Every Sunday night, clean out the fridge, mochito style, going to make a badass tuna fish.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
So you can see me self-deprecate and tell a story where I ate shit. And then after that, you can stomach me going, so here's the lesson I learned from it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Well, it's a long list of all kinds of things. I mean, it starts with the, with, with the base. You get your good, get your good tuna. Yeah. Um, Next, you got to watch how much lemon and vinegar you add. Because if you add the mayo mixed with wasabi. Oh, shut the fuck up.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Whip it up. A little light green. Get that in there on the tuna. Because if you put, whatever you put on the tuna first is gonna soak it up.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
We should have been talking about this the whole time. Get a base. Yeah. And then all the rest of the stuff from the chopped red onions or the dill pickled gherkins. I'll finally slice the dill pickled gherkins. There's a jalapeno product now. It's been seared in hot oil, so it's crispy jalapeno chips to give it a little crunch. I come in with... To balance that out. At the end, I do go.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You know? But don't be going straight advice across the board. People shut that thing on. Shut up. Quit telling me what the fuck to do. For sure. Did you notice this? This is something, big thing. The person. First, second, third, I, you, we. So it's about us telling the first person. This is my experience. You can have an opinion, but you can't really judge me right or wrong.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'll go with some apple for some sweetness, a touch of agave to balance out that wasabi here. Yeah, yeah. And at the end, I do go, man, I always have corn in there. I always got corn. Really? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And then at the end, I'll go some frozen green peas. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And then, as you know, as every redneck knows, is it better right then or is it better covered after you put it in the fridge the next day? It's all coagulated. All the tastes are right. You're sitting there now. I've hit the home run. So it sat in there.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Oh, yeah, he did. Well, then I pull out extra pickles because I love to dip my pickle, take a bite of tuna, bite the pickle with the Heinz ketchup on the end of the pickle.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That's all I heard. Yeah, man.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Steak, what cut do you eat? One and five-eighth inch American Wagyu ribeye. Rib eye's the steak. Rib eye's the steak. Rib eye's the steak. Admit it or not, if we're not talking about, oh, I want to eat lean, I know I have my elk, I do fillet.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Well, there are different ways. So I go one and five eighth inch, which means it's a big, thick piece of meat, which means I don't take it to the oven to ever bake it to get the middle cooked. I do like to sear it. I either go... On the grill. Yeah. I mean, if I can get that green egg to sit there and hold at 455, then I'm, then I'm enclosed that thing and trust it. Beautiful. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Other times where we're just inside and I'm time for that. I'm a big 16 inch black skillet. oil, butter, cast iron, get that baby height and sear that and flip some oil and butter on top of that thing because I just learned this, that that butter doesn't brown if you put it in early with the oil.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And then obviously that old trick that everyone forgets, let that son of a bitch sit for as long as you cooked it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's got to settle. Yeah. And all those tendons have to just kind of relax.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And also, do you all know this one? This may be obvious, but it's the cook it at room temperature. You can't pull it out of the fridge. You can pull it right out of the fridge. Yeah. No, no. You got to let it. You got to let it sit. Get back to room temperature. That's a good one. And all those pores open up. So one and five eighth inch American Wagyu ribeye.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
That's like a religion around here. I mean, look, man, I've never tasted any brisket I like better than Franklin's. Yeah. Have you had the steak over at Lambert's? No. I won't be doing that tonight. Taste that dirty little brown sugar top, son of a bitch. Oh, it's a dirty little dog. It's good. Ooh. Yeah. The ribeye over there. Taste it. Make you want to go.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Peter, please get us reservations for tonight. And they're not afraid of salt. No. Oh, neither. I'm on blood pressure medicine. I mean, come on. It's serious. Mm-hmm. Um... The barbecue I've had. I mean, there's so much good. Yeah, it's so good. I'm not a barbecue nerd. I'm not religious about it. Right. I've had great barbecue in many places. But Franklin's brisket, what he figured out.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yes, it's incredible. Walk away. Yeah. Drop your mic. That Opie's jalapeno cream corn with the jalapeno sausage. Take the chunk of sausage, fork it, dunk it in the Opie's. Cream of corn and jalapeno, then eat it. That's one of the top three bites I've ever had in my life.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm just telling you how I experienced it. Second person is you. Now we're giving advice. You've got to watch. You're telling people what to do, right? You've got to watch that because no one likes to be told what to do. Third, the royal we. Which you got to watch that because then your shit can all sound like big platitudes. Like, what are you, God or something?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
For osos. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Here's what the inspiration that was. I was going through some old scrapbooks, and there was a picture of my mom and dad at Halloween. And they had taken these. She was in glad trash bags taped up, and it said M&M's with tape on it. Plain. I fucking love your parents. M&Ms with nuts. I love your parents.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Oh, wow.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I kind of, after reading your book, feel like you're... I'm a whole lot more my mom than I realize, and that's a happy... Trail for me to recognize and learn along the way. Look, my mom, I'm still aspiring to understand and be some things that she is. My mom is like real grade A proof in the value of denial if you truly commit to it. And she commits to it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Not intellectually talks herself into it and then commits. No, bam. That's what, I don't have cancer. Well, mom, you do. No, I don't. She's not doing an intellectual trick. I do not. Okay, well, then would you take this pill anyway? Okay. But I don't have it. Life, I don't like you. I don't like whatever. You don't like someone. Nope. Boom. Out of my life.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Mom, I mean, do you want to let him down easy? No. Why do I want to waste any time? No. Not for me. I didn't. But she does. I mean, I don't know if I wrote about it. I've shared this many times. I went to this. The way, her ability to forgive herself. or actually not even feel guilty about anything in the first place to forgive herself about is amazing. And this is not a shallow woman.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
This is a woman who, 92, mom, what's the secret? Well, I can't imagine not being here. Walk off. Okay. It's not a line. It's not a Hallmark card. It's not an intellectual choice she's making to say, oh, I want to think positively. Uh-uh. She's beyond that to where it's a full-on capacity. That's her identity. Yes is her favorite word.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Dude, I went to her because she pulls wild-ass stunts. Wild stuff. My brother's playing golf one day after my father passed away and the four older men on the other fairway are like, hey, congratulations, Pat.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
The proverbial we? But the interplay of those was something that I got real conscious of along the way. Because if I would go into the you too much, it comes across preachy. Definitely. Going to the I all the time, you're going, well, it's your story, but what's that have to do with me? I don't see myself. And if you use the proverbial we, you're like...
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
My brother's like, what? I ain't getting married. They're like, oh, yeah, anyway, sorry. You tell them that, mom, what'd you do? What are you talking about? Mom, what'd you do? What's it say here about you and Jack getting married? Oh, that. Mom, what'd you do? Well, first, I didn't think you'd find out, but here's what we did.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Look, the Country Club dues are $400 a month if you're just together, but they're only $250 a month if you're married. So we just told them we were married. Mom, come on. And she'll cry, say I'm sorry, and then boom, forget about it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
To have told everybody at the country club that they were married. To save $150 a month. Just like badass like that. And then he'll sit there and cry and say, I'm sorry. Not a shallow woman at all, but just bam.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Asks for show. Makes all the girls scream. Gets you on TV. That's for dough. Puts the roof over our head, food on the plate, takes care of business. It's a work muscle. Work ethic was a big thing to him. Don't half-ass it. If you're gonna do it, man, do it. And if you can't, don't say can't. If you're having trouble, ask for help. But don't sit there and say I can't because there's a solution.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah, to dads, man. Hey, and to more Govans out there because there's no... There's no better. You got kids? Two. And you got kids. Dude, this is a... If more dads, the dads out there, you're not in a toast here and say, can we be as good of a dad as we can be? Good of a father? This whole planet's going to be looking good for all of us, man. A lot better. Amen on that. What do you think?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Oh, that's nice and easy. It's vodka. I don't drink much vodka. Not a lot of men do. But a little on the backside kind of opens up.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I walked in, he was doing a Speedo shoot. It's in his contract. It's in my contract. It's in the contract.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Okay, Mr. Big Stuff, speaking with the voice of God.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Because, look, you can sell snake oil with a good marketing campaign. You can get away with shit. You can put lipstick on the donkey and call it thoroughbred and people will go bet on it in the race. But we said, look, let's make some real good fucking juice first. We're serious about our tequila. Let's make some really good juice first.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Let's be formal about that process, which took two years and 47 tasters. But once we got that, we said, boom, circus. Now let's have some frickin' fun. People have been talking real snooty up nosy about tequila for a long time. Now let's have some fun. Pantalone is a great name. Oh, I can run with that. Oh, what can you do with your pants off? Pixels will be our friend.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
The pixels that cover in our midsection are joke. And they're a running joke. They're like the beep, mother beeper. They're like the beep. You laugh. Ah, I think they cussed right there. Ah, I think they're naked under there. And we can run with that forever. I also think, though, and ask me this. Curious if I'm giving this too much justice.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Do you think it would have worked if I'd have been with anyone other than my wife?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I don't either.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Right?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Because there's a good, clean fun of it that whatever you know about Camilla and I, her and I married, we got kids. It's like, all right. There's a certain demographic, I think, if it had been me and, I don't know, another actress, there's a certain demographic that would have been like, no, I'm not. This is too much of a stunt. I don't want to think that those two are naked in front of each other.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Who's my best friend? Great question. That's two great questions I got in this interview. I think it's the third.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Who's my best friend? Probably Camilla. I'm happy to say. I mean, I got some really close friends, and I don't have a best friend like I had a best friend in high school. I had a best friend in college. I had a best friend.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Early part of my career, I mean, as far as the person that I share with and that sees me express myself and sits there and comes to me and pops me and gut checks me on places where maybe I'm trying to get away with something that she's like, no, no, no, no, that ain't gonna fly. Or lets me know, hey man, here's a glass of pantalones, man. Be easy on yourself for a second.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
She walks a good line with that. She's great about... Next day is after the party. She's great about this. You know, everyone goes to the weekend wedding in Mexico. And it's Friday, Saturday night's the wedding. And then Sunday, everyone gets out of there, shade in their eyes to make it to work on Monday morning. She's great about this.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Let's make sure that we have Monday open and the first thing on Tuesday is after 2 p.m. And we're going to not leave until Monday afternoon. So while everyone rushes out, we're going to merge out. Have a beer by the pool. Grab another sign. Have another cocktail that night. Eat a good meal. She's really great about the soft landings.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
She's really good about that.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Sorry. And I've got some other friends. I've got some real good... I have some girls I'm good friends with, but I have a lot of good male friends. And I've been seeking elders. I found myself in the last eight years. Mentors. Older men that have done it well, held their stuff together, been about themselves. We should get some mentors.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I'm with you, man. It reminds me of another. This is not a trick, but it's a good reminder. And it's a simple one that I think is a really good one. It has been in my life. in this world where so many of our relationships, whether it is for us or not, it is for the other, transactional.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
To sit there every month, and I've tried to, is reach out to people. It's just a five-minute howdy, and I don't ask for nothing. And I've noticed that it's almost like they go, well, what do you, nothing. Don't need anything. It can go a long way.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
And it's a quick little hit. It's not a deep, long thing. It's just a quick little hit for nothing at all. Just checking in.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Get the audio book. It just fucking talks. It was fun to read. They said it was going to take like four days to record it. And I remember just sitting there going... man, I know these stories. I wrote this. It's not going to take four days. Popped a couple of buds and eight hours. One take.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It ain't going to be long.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
You ain't going to go take a long walk to go sit down. And it's just a...
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
He's writing and he's writing. He's making a living writing scripts. For real? Yeah. I'm like, he's writing scripts that are being made by major studios. So he's got, he found a good, I met with him. It's been a couple of years, but he's, I think he's doing, when I talked to him, he's doing well.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Fucking wasted that. Got some killer black and whites from it. It's so cool. Well, I don't know. I mean, that's kind of what... If you try and be cool... I don't know anyone that's really cool. We try to be cool. We always talk about this about the city of Austin. All you got to do is be you. A lot of people move to Austin going, okay, well, I'm going to try to be what I think being me is like.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
No, that's not cool. Or I'm going to try to be what Austin is like. No, no, no. No, just be you, bro. Stay in your own lane. Do your own thing. Yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Uh, dude, I think cool comes from just ownership. You know, if it's an actor, I'll owning my man. Uh, yeah. For instance, first role I ever did, Wooderson, Days Confused. Fucking love it. There's a line written in there, Richard Linklater, one of the original lines. I call it a launch pad line. Those lines that you go, this character means that.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
There's a book written I could write on that character, right? Wooderson's hanging out in front of the pool hall. High school chicks walk by. He checks him out the backside. His buddy leans in his ear and says, Wooderson, you've got to cut that out, man. You're going to end up in jail. He says, no, man, that's what I love about those high school girls, man. I get older, but they stay the same age.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I went, who the fuck is that? Now, what if that guy is not saying that line to be cool? What if that guy's, that's not an attitude. He's not trying to make a joke to make Sasha laugh. He's like, I got life figured out, man. This is how the math works. I am living in the salad days, to quote the Coens, right?
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. Wow.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
life philosophy yeah now that unpacked all kinds of stuff because it was truth truth and the guy's saying this truth and i think what happened and i look back at the scene i actually stepped forward on the curb and kind of set it to the ether set it to the universe like yeah we're good man yeah yeah that's why i like a wooderson and i wasn't trying to be cool but owning owning it is your your your your life your politics whatever it is you're what you want what you can do what you can't do yeah
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
What works for you, what doesn't? Without soliciting, without intruding, cool doesn't really intrude. Cool doesn't trespass. You know those people you talk to, you're like, man, I love talking to them because they kind of hold their space, man. You know those people you talk to that are always trying to get in there and solicit and get the, you're like, be cool, man. Yeah, yeah. Own your shit.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Yeah. You don't need me to convert to make you cool. Right.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Right. Right. So I think it's ownership. And if I can find that or any performance I see where you see somebody own whoever they are, the most, nerds are cool.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
right when they're like i'm a nerd man i like this that's cool yes i don't think dorks are cool because dorks what's the difference between a nerd and a dork nerd dorks don't want to want to say dorks change their answer for wherever they are to fit the circumstance to do what they think is the cool thing you need to come to the comedy mothership fucking green room there's a bunch of dorks in there okay
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
There's no compass. Everything's an affair. There's no marriage on any sort of POV or stance.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's like... We talk about improv a lot. Y'all know improv, but I mean movies. And comedians do this sometimes. Some comedians are very good actors. Some... are better performers at a skit and not necessarily a great actor.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
There are some scenes, and I won't point them out, but there are some scenes in the movie that we've all laughed at very hard, but I look at it and go, that's a great SNL skit, but that had nothing to do with the relationship and the circumstance in that movie. Right. So riffing and improv is not an amendment.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Oh, hell yeah.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
It's not a one-off of, I've got to find a spot to get this joke in, and if I get a gap, I'm going to throw it.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
If it has no context. Yeah, it doesn't. Then it's like, okay, that's a skit. Improv comes from the... Good improv, I think, comes from the written word, from what was the base of who the character is, what's the circumstance, what's the relationship. And then if you can riff on that, then you're like, I don't know. You call it improv? I don't know. It's coming from... You're just expanding.
2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Matthew McConaughey Is The Coolest Dude In Texas | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
I get a launch pad line like that. I'm going... I come back, work for three weeks. Linklater throws me in scenes. I'm going like, everything's based off the guy who believes that I've got life figured out because that's what I love. But high school girls, I get older, they stay the same age. You know what car that guy drives.
The Megyn Kelly Show
Megyn Kelly Details the Curious Case of Carlos Watson, and Shocking Downfall of the Disgraced Media Mogul | Ep. 969
Hey, Matt.
The Megyn Kelly Show
Megyn Kelly Details the Curious Case of Carlos Watson, and Shocking Downfall of the Disgraced Media Mogul | Ep. 969
Hey, Carlos, how are you? But now, you know, with this terrible situation, with COVID, I'm at home yelling at the screen like my grandfather used to yell at the professional wrestlers.