Melanie McGuire

I still care.

And I don't wanna care.

And I don't wanna cry.

And I don't wanna keep living.

This loss over and over and over again between the loss of my family, of my husband for better or for worse, of the father and my kids, for Brad my whole life.

If I were a juror, I would want to hear it from me.

But I understand the concerns that the attorneys have, which is why you've already been cross-examined by two people you loved and trusted.

The way they've presented it, it's damning.

And I'm scared.

All right.

I think that's about enough for tonight.

I love you more than life itself, and I would never have taken your father from you.

We had a life together.

Because this is not who I am.

I have spent my life, my professional life, giving people life, trying to bring life into the world.

I am so afraid to feel optimistic, to feel hopeful.

I felt responsible, not because I killed my husband, because I didn't, but because if I hadn't stayed with him this long, if I hadn't had the affair, if I hadn't moved the car, if I hadn't bought the gun, these people I love, let alone me, wouldn't be in this kind of pain right now.

It was the worst moment of my life.

It was like a death.

This is my life now.