Mike Carruthers

You say yes when you mean no.

You stay quiet when you know you should speak up.

And then afterwards, you're not just frustrated, you're confused because it's not like you didn't see it coming.

So why do smart, self-aware people keep repeating behaviors that make them unhappy?

It turns out these patterns are not random.

They're learned, reinforced, even rewarded in subtle ways.

And until you understand what's driving them, willpower alone probably won't fix them.

Licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Morton has spent years helping people uncover the hidden reasons behind their self-sabotaging habits.

She's the author of Why Do I Keep Doing This?

Unlearn the Habits Keeping You Stuck and Unhappy.

And she's here to explain why we get stuck and how to stop.

Hey Katie, welcome to Something You Should Know.

So start by throwing out some of these behaviors that you're talking about.

I just mentioned a few, but give people a flavor of what you mean.

And do you think when people do those things, they know it's a problem or that's just the way they do things?

And so where do these things come from?

These are patterns, you say, but patterns had to start somewhere one day.

How?

In order to address it, though, you have to realize it's a problem.

If you don't think it's a problem, then there's no problem.