Mike Della Rocha

Ship your kids away.

Get ready, Nora and Adler.

You're not sleeping over at your own house anymore.

It's older.

Whatever.

Jose, what's on your mind?

Well, last week I told you guys about this new massage parlor I've been going to.

Wait, you went again?

After that horrible experience?

Since I have a year-long membership here that I can't get out of, I had to request a new masseuse.

So the day of, they send me a text before I get there, and it says your hot stones for my hot stone massage are broken.

Oh.

how do you break stones that's my exact question i'm like how do you break stones too hot right they're earth stones they usually just put them in like a slow cooker i mean honestly look it's not a big deal i'm confused because i'm like okay but whatever i go in the new masseuse walks in she says i have good news they shaved down the stones so they can be smooth and they can use them now

You can't get a refund here, are you?

No, and this is an addition to a regular massage.

You pay extra for the stones, Brooke.

She says, look, the heater, it heats up one rock really good.

And the rest of them don't get.

So she starts to massage me.

with tiny rocks pebbles on my back and one of them is piping hot like i can feel the one and then the other one so imagine a bunch of small pebbles scratching my back okay sounds kind of nice hot skipping stone massage is what i'm calling it okay and then after that she's like well i'm so glad we were able to adjust and take care of you i'm like me too as i have like tiny little burn marks