Nicole LePera

Now it gets confusing when those moments are at night, right, when we're resting.

Yeah.

But now, right, the awareness here and the exploration is, well, was there moments to rest in my childhood, right?

Was there enough safety, security, predictability?

Was it quiet?

Or did silence and stopping come with everything from the message of not to be lazy, rest when you're dead, to it just wasn't safe to rest?

Hmm.

There was dysfunction in the home, abuse.

There was loud noises.

And so when I look back at my childhood, not only was it what was happening in the home, I grew up in a very urban setting.

I grew up in the middle of Philadelphia.

There was noises.

There were sirens.

I went to sleep with noise.

So it's not surprising that when I discovered I went to college in upstate New York and it was much quieter, I had to put a television on to sleep because silence, right, meant what's going on here.

Where's the next noise going to come?

Is it going to be a bump in the night and something terrible happening to my family?

So awareness, again, while I have somewhat of the idea of the story from where it came from, I've been able to piece it together.

We start now, right?

We tune into our body in real time.