Pico Iyer

But the more times I stayed there, the more I realized, first, that I was never alone because my friends and my loved ones lived more powerfully inside me in that cell than they do when they're in the same room or when I'm driving down the freeway with a thousand things on my mind. but also that the only point of being there was to be a better friend to them.

And that's where witnessing the sense of community and the compassion that the monks exemplify really made a difference. And so I was thinking recently after writing the book that one thing I never could have guessed and that amuses me is that I'm a solitary soul. And I assumed I was never going to get married. And it was only by going to sit in the solitude of the cell that

And that's where witnessing the sense of community and the compassion that the monks exemplify really made a difference. And so I was thinking recently after writing the book that one thing I never could have guessed and that amuses me is that I'm a solitary soul. And I assumed I was never going to get married. And it was only by going to sit in the solitude of the cell that

And that's where witnessing the sense of community and the compassion that the monks exemplify really made a difference. And so I was thinking recently after writing the book that one thing I never could have guessed and that amuses me is that I'm a solitary soul. And I assumed I was never going to get married. And it was only by going to sit in the solitude of the cell that

that I decided to get married. At one point, I think my second year in the monastery, I was there staying in a beautiful trailer for three weeks. And I drove down to the payphone at the bottom of the hill and called my then girlfriend in Japan. And the blue-green waters were at my feet, and the slopes were flooded with orange golden poppies and lupins. It was a brilliant spring afternoon.

that I decided to get married. At one point, I think my second year in the monastery, I was there staying in a beautiful trailer for three weeks. And I drove down to the payphone at the bottom of the hill and called my then girlfriend in Japan. And the blue-green waters were at my feet, and the slopes were flooded with orange golden poppies and lupins. It was a brilliant spring afternoon.

that I decided to get married. At one point, I think my second year in the monastery, I was there staying in a beautiful trailer for three weeks. And I drove down to the payphone at the bottom of the hill and called my then girlfriend in Japan. And the blue-green waters were at my feet, and the slopes were flooded with orange golden poppies and lupins. It was a brilliant spring afternoon.

And she could hear the light in my voice. And finally, she said, you know, I'm never worried about losing you to another woman. I can be more and more excellent. But how can I compete with a temple?

And she could hear the light in my voice. And finally, she said, you know, I'm never worried about losing you to another woman. I can be more and more excellent. But how can I compete with a temple?

And she could hear the light in my voice. And finally, she said, you know, I'm never worried about losing you to another woman. I can be more and more excellent. But how can I compete with a temple?

And that sentence went so deeply through me that a few weeks later, I did move across the world and to the tiny two-room apartment in the middle of nowhere she was sharing with her two children, now my children, and made this commitment for life. And oddly, when I think back on it – and I was slow to get married, as I say –

And that sentence went so deeply through me that a few weeks later, I did move across the world and to the tiny two-room apartment in the middle of nowhere she was sharing with her two children, now my children, and made this commitment for life. And oddly, when I think back on it – and I was slow to get married, as I say –

And that sentence went so deeply through me that a few weeks later, I did move across the world and to the tiny two-room apartment in the middle of nowhere she was sharing with her two children, now my children, and made this commitment for life. And oddly, when I think back on it – and I was slow to get married, as I say –

I don't think I could have made that leap towards living with other people and trying to give myself as much as possible to them had I not had that very special kind of silence and witnessed how the monks were living. Because, as you said earlier, they're not living with silence and solitude, but the opposite, with constant busyness and community.

I don't think I could have made that leap towards living with other people and trying to give myself as much as possible to them had I not had that very special kind of silence and witnessed how the monks were living. Because, as you said earlier, they're not living with silence and solitude, but the opposite, with constant busyness and community.

I don't think I could have made that leap towards living with other people and trying to give myself as much as possible to them had I not had that very special kind of silence and witnessed how the monks were living. Because, as you said earlier, they're not living with silence and solitude, but the opposite, with constant busyness and community.

The self that you're listening to now is chattering. I don't think it's just chatter.

The self that you're listening to now is chattering. I don't think it's just chatter.

The self that you're listening to now is chattering. I don't think it's just chatter.

Yeah, exactly. Our talking selves are our social selves, and they're very different from our silent selves. And, of course, when I'm sitting here in Santa Barbara, part of me is in the world, and I want to have a nice conversation with Terry, and I'm concerned about my book that's just coming out, and all of that fluctuates.