Rich Syverson

Cinco de Mayo, the party of parties. I wanted to hit up an authentic fiesta this year, so I went down to Dallas, Texas, where thousands of Latinos were taking the party to the streets. How's your party going?

Cinco de Mayo, the party of parties. I wanted to hit up an authentic fiesta this year, so I went down to Dallas, Texas, where thousands of Latinos were taking the party to the streets. How's your party going?

Are you kidding? Look at all these moves I'm doing. What we're looking for is immigration reform. Here I am with my girls on Cinco de Mayo!

Are you kidding? Look at all these moves I'm doing. What we're looking for is immigration reform. Here I am with my girls on Cinco de Mayo!

So 5,000 people chose to waste their Cinco de Mayo by marching for more humane immigration laws? Nuh-uh. Not on my watch. I have a two-year work permit, but after that, it's very uncertain. We're supposed to be talking about party stuff, like, what's the craziest place you ever boinked somebody? Mine's beside an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. I don't have one like that.

So 5,000 people chose to waste their Cinco de Mayo by marching for more humane immigration laws? Nuh-uh. Not on my watch. I have a two-year work permit, but after that, it's very uncertain. We're supposed to be talking about party stuff, like, what's the craziest place you ever boinked somebody? Mine's beside an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. I don't have one like that.

All right. You know what that means. Parents away. You got to get wicked. Take the top shirt off. Yeah. I was trying to get the party started, but the negativity was wearing me down.

All right. You know what that means. Parents away. You got to get wicked. Take the top shirt off. Yeah. I was trying to get the party started, but the negativity was wearing me down.

These people were bumming me out. What's worse, what I thought was the beer line turned out to be for something called Votar. Clearly these people had a lot to learn about the American holiday of Cinco de Mayo. I took a few of these party poopers with me to show them the true meaning of the day.

These people were bumming me out. What's worse, what I thought was the beer line turned out to be for something called Votar. Clearly these people had a lot to learn about the American holiday of Cinco de Mayo. I took a few of these party poopers with me to show them the true meaning of the day.

We don't want to get into political stuff.

We don't want to get into political stuff.

This is why Cinco de Mayo's all about! They had much to learn about our traditions.

This is why Cinco de Mayo's all about! They had much to learn about our traditions.

See, it's a taquito, a taquito.

See, it's a taquito, a taquito.

Taquitos, yeah.

Taquitos, yeah.

I even figured out a way to combine our ritualized drinking with their bizarre need to constantly crusade for basic rights.

I even figured out a way to combine our ritualized drinking with their bizarre need to constantly crusade for basic rights.

Inhumane! That's the one! Everybody in here! Ah! A cross-cultural success. One of the activists even offered to be a designated driver. Four. I can take four. In the back. Maybe we need each other after all. They do the jobs we don't want to do. Staying sober and being politically engaged.

Inhumane! That's the one! Everybody in here! Ah! A cross-cultural success. One of the activists even offered to be a designated driver. Four. I can take four. In the back. Maybe we need each other after all. They do the jobs we don't want to do. Staying sober and being politically engaged.

Drinking for a single day, Trinco.

Drinking for a single day, Trinco.