Rob Dial

So one person can be locked in from an event and the other person can get better and learn from it.

So the brain will find evidence for the meaning that you assign to the event.

So if you assign an identity to it, like I'm a failure, your brain will look for all of the evidence to prove that true.

It doesn't matter what it is.

It doesn't have to actually be true.

It will try to prove it true.

So if you say I'm a failure because of this thing, it'll look for all of the evidence to prove what you believe about yourself to be true.

But if you assign a lesson to it,

Your brain will also look for all of the evidence to prove that true and to prove, hey, this is actually something that I should be learning from.

And so like, let's go a level deeper behind this, right?

The best way that you learn is from failing, not from reading a book, not from listening to a podcast.

Those are great and they do have their places in your life, but failure is the best teacher, right?

And most people are trying to avoid it, right?

From going out, from trying, from fucking up, from learning, from getting better next time, right?

Imagine a failed relationship, for instance.

The fact is this, a relationship ended.

Everything else is full-on interpretation.

Yet most people immediately think, oh, well, the relationship ended, and they immediately add in, like, I'm unlovable, and I'll always be abandoned, and nobody ever stays in my life, and I'll be alone forever.

This is the example of the data, which is a relationship ended, getting contaminated.

The event happened.