Rob O'Neill

The way when your crazy aunt taught you about Jesus or whatever, I know this.

They know this.

They're that crazy.

So my plan is, here's the deal.

I'll go in there.

We'll ask the village elders where the Taliban is.

And if you tell me, I'll kill the dragon without a German B-52.

And I assure you, I'll even come in every day for seven days to make sure the sun comes up.

That's all me.

Tell me where they are.

And I told the bosses in the army, that's what we're going to do.

And they said, no, that's stupid.

I'm like, is it?

That sounds like a pretty foolproof plan.

It sounds okay to me, but that's the whole, you get into the military, this is the way we've always done it, bullshit, and that's how we end up in 20-year wars.

Yeah, that must have been frustrating for you, right?

It's almost like flying in an airplane.

You want to stop the person from getting his bag back, let everyone go, but then you realize what I say is not going to matter.

Just fucking watch.

Well, there's an argument that they want prolonged wars for business.