Sabrina Zohar

Off the bat, let's talk about what ghosting is. By definition, ghosting means an abrupt ending in a relationship. That's the key word here. So that means we have had to build some kind of rapport. To me, the I haven't answered on an app, that's not ghosting to me. You don't know who this person is. You have never met this person. You don't owe these people anything.

So scientifically, right? This isn't me just making shit up. This is an actual study. If you Google, anybody that wants to Google the spark by Harvard, that's it. It'd come up to 2015.

So scientifically, right? This isn't me just making shit up. This is an actual study. If you Google, anybody that wants to Google the spark by Harvard, that's it. It'd come up to 2015.

So scientifically, right? This isn't me just making shit up. This is an actual study. If you Google, anybody that wants to Google the spark by Harvard, that's it. It'd come up to 2015.

So scientifically, right? This isn't me just making shit up. This is an actual study. If you Google, anybody that wants to Google the spark by Harvard, that's it. It'd come up to 2015.

So scientifically, right? This isn't me just making shit up. This is an actual study. If you Google, anybody that wants to Google the spark by Harvard, that's it. It'd come up to 2015.

My friend, Scott, he is a doctor, like a psychologist, and he calls them the trauma tingles because scientifically what they've seen is the spark is just your nervous system giving blood to your, I call them the phalanges, but to your hands and your feet so that you could run. Because there's something that your body is recognizing that feels familiar.

My friend, Scott, he is a doctor, like a psychologist, and he calls them the trauma tingles because scientifically what they've seen is the spark is just your nervous system giving blood to your, I call them the phalanges, but to your hands and your feet so that you could run. Because there's something that your body is recognizing that feels familiar.

My friend, Scott, he is a doctor, like a psychologist, and he calls them the trauma tingles because scientifically what they've seen is the spark is just your nervous system giving blood to your, I call them the phalanges, but to your hands and your feet so that you could run. Because there's something that your body is recognizing that feels familiar.

My friend, Scott, he is a doctor, like a psychologist, and he calls them the trauma tingles because scientifically what they've seen is the spark is just your nervous system giving blood to your, I call them the phalanges, but to your hands and your feet so that you could run. Because there's something that your body is recognizing that feels familiar.

My friend, Scott, he is a doctor, like a psychologist, and he calls them the trauma tingles because scientifically what they've seen is the spark is just your nervous system giving blood to your, I call them the phalanges, but to your hands and your feet so that you could run. Because there's something that your body is recognizing that feels familiar.

And that to me means expectations, right? If I say, well, what the hell? This person ghosted me on an app. It's like, why are you expecting some stranger on the internet to owe you anything?

They might not even be real, right? Catfishing is so huge. They're bots, right? And also there's a reality that I don't know who you are. I've talked to you for a day. I don't owe you anything. Maybe you said something that was a huge turnoff and I was just like, I'm good, I'm out, right?

So you felt the spark with these guys and you look back and you're like, yeah, they were all abusive or whatever, not abusive, but controlling or this or that, right? Whatever, insert this word. Because what ends up happening is, let me ask you this, the spark, right? You feel that. If you weren't attracted to that person, you'd probably be like, I need to get out of here. Something feels off.

So you felt the spark with these guys and you look back and you're like, yeah, they were all abusive or whatever, not abusive, but controlling or this or that, right? Whatever, insert this word. Because what ends up happening is, let me ask you this, the spark, right? You feel that. If you weren't attracted to that person, you'd probably be like, I need to get out of here. Something feels off.

So you felt the spark with these guys and you look back and you're like, yeah, they were all abusive or whatever, not abusive, but controlling or this or that, right? Whatever, insert this word. Because what ends up happening is, let me ask you this, the spark, right? You feel that. If you weren't attracted to that person, you'd probably be like, I need to get out of here. Something feels off.

So you felt the spark with these guys and you look back and you're like, yeah, they were all abusive or whatever, not abusive, but controlling or this or that, right? Whatever, insert this word. Because what ends up happening is, let me ask you this, the spark, right? You feel that. If you weren't attracted to that person, you'd probably be like, I need to get out of here. Something feels off.

So you felt the spark with these guys and you look back and you're like, yeah, they were all abusive or whatever, not abusive, but controlling or this or that, right? Whatever, insert this word. Because what ends up happening is, let me ask you this, the spark, right? You feel that. If you weren't attracted to that person, you'd probably be like, I need to get out of here. Something feels off.

And so then what I see the people that are like, I can't believe they ghosted and they message a thousand times. It's like, that's probably why this person said, no, thank you. I'm kind of the same. Listen, let's say you have a first date. No one texts each other after. That's not ghosting. No one said anything. You move on with your life. You don't owe anyone anything.

I feel this intensity. I'm dysregulated. I don't feel safe here. The problem is we see someone attractive and go, oh, Oh my God, it's a sign. What we want to look at is we want your nervous system to feel regulated. We want your nervous system to feel safe with this person. And that means that the spark isn't going to be present. That doesn't mean you can't have attraction.