Sarah Ruth Thomas

11-14-2020, 2-15 p.m.

Valerie left today.

It wasn't unexpected.

I just have a hard time accepting it.

We drifted.

We grew distant.

She grew unhappy.

We tried to fix the issues, but it ended up pretty clear that neither of us really had stock left in the relationship.

I guess it sucks because we still do have so much love for each other, you know?

Like, two people stepping away just because they know there will be better opportunities for us elsewhere.

I almost wish we hated each other.

Nah, I don't mean that.

Adjustment is just a nightmare.

Seeing her stuff leave the apartment just kind of hit me differently.

And no matter how often we talked about it, it didn't get any easier.

Life, huh?

Hey, you know, I think I'll move my computer around and try and make myself busy and distracted for the rest of the day.

So, I have a new hobby.

A weird one, I'll admit, but it does take me away from the rampaging rat race and overthinking about Valerie.

She still wants to talk from time to time, but I don't think I'm there yet.