Sarah Wildman

Did you have your own questions about God and your child's suffering? You know, at the very beginning, we have a very close relationship with our rabbis. And early on, one of them asked me, are you angry with God? And that's a question that actually has come up again and again within the family. But for me, it wasn't angry. It was more, as my grandfather would have said, wo ist Gott?

Did you have your own questions about God and your child's suffering? You know, at the very beginning, we have a very close relationship with our rabbis. And early on, one of them asked me, are you angry with God? And that's a question that actually has come up again and again within the family. But for me, it wasn't angry. It was more, as my grandfather would have said, wo ist Gott?

Like, where is God? Can you even see God in this? How does it even, what does it mean to have come from a faith tradition? and feel like you've done the right things, whatever that means. Whether it means religiously, because we actually have Shabbat, we keep a kosher house, we follow many of the rules. We thought of ourselves as relatively good people.

Like, where is God? Can you even see God in this? How does it even, what does it mean to have come from a faith tradition? and feel like you've done the right things, whatever that means. Whether it means religiously, because we actually have Shabbat, we keep a kosher house, we follow many of the rules. We thought of ourselves as relatively good people.

Like, where is God? Can you even see God in this? How does it even, what does it mean to have come from a faith tradition? and feel like you've done the right things, whatever that means. Whether it means religiously, because we actually have Shabbat, we keep a kosher house, we follow many of the rules. We thought of ourselves as relatively good people.

I mean, what does it mean to face this question and have... The whole world turned upside down. It felt like there wasn't really a space for God within it. And you had to constantly search for what that looked like. I had to really see it in the divinity of people who went out of their way to help us and that weren't afraid of us.

I mean, what does it mean to face this question and have... The whole world turned upside down. It felt like there wasn't really a space for God within it. And you had to constantly search for what that looked like. I had to really see it in the divinity of people who went out of their way to help us and that weren't afraid of us.

I mean, what does it mean to face this question and have... The whole world turned upside down. It felt like there wasn't really a space for God within it. And you had to constantly search for what that looked like. I had to really see it in the divinity of people who went out of their way to help us and that weren't afraid of us.

It is very easy to be afraid of a family going through a catastrophe.

It is very easy to be afraid of a family going through a catastrophe.

It is very easy to be afraid of a family going through a catastrophe.

It's really difficult because sometimes I also felt that people wanted me to cry with them. And I cry a lot, but I can't cry every time someone cries to me. And I sometimes... felt that it was hard. I didn't know who to comfort in that space. Sometimes what ends up happening if someone cries to me is that the roles reverse. I end up comforting them. I can't say it's okay because it's not, right?

It's really difficult because sometimes I also felt that people wanted me to cry with them. And I cry a lot, but I can't cry every time someone cries to me. And I sometimes... felt that it was hard. I didn't know who to comfort in that space. Sometimes what ends up happening if someone cries to me is that the roles reverse. I end up comforting them. I can't say it's okay because it's not, right?

It's really difficult because sometimes I also felt that people wanted me to cry with them. And I cry a lot, but I can't cry every time someone cries to me. And I sometimes... felt that it was hard. I didn't know who to comfort in that space. Sometimes what ends up happening if someone cries to me is that the roles reverse. I end up comforting them. I can't say it's okay because it's not, right?

And I think one of the really difficult things about facing a parent who has lost a child If you think anyone who's lost anyone, but particularly in parental bereavement, is that you cannot make it better. There is no betterment of this. There's no, it's going to get better. She's not coming back.

And I think one of the really difficult things about facing a parent who has lost a child If you think anyone who's lost anyone, but particularly in parental bereavement, is that you cannot make it better. There is no betterment of this. There's no, it's going to get better. She's not coming back.

And I think one of the really difficult things about facing a parent who has lost a child If you think anyone who's lost anyone, but particularly in parental bereavement, is that you cannot make it better. There is no betterment of this. There's no, it's going to get better. She's not coming back.

What's easier, though, is when people aren't afraid of mentioning her name or reminding me of a story or telling me something I didn't know that she'd told them or that she'd done for them. It's very hard when people cry to me, and I am a little bit at a loss as to where I fit in their grief.

What's easier, though, is when people aren't afraid of mentioning her name or reminding me of a story or telling me something I didn't know that she'd told them or that she'd done for them. It's very hard when people cry to me, and I am a little bit at a loss as to where I fit in their grief.

What's easier, though, is when people aren't afraid of mentioning her name or reminding me of a story or telling me something I didn't know that she'd told them or that she'd done for them. It's very hard when people cry to me, and I am a little bit at a loss as to where I fit in their grief.