Simone Stolzoff

And so I think it does require some tolerance, some ability to say, okay, I know this is an uncertain situation.

Even if I gather all the information in the world and survey all my friends, I might still not have certainty.

How can I develop the conviction to make a choice regardless?

I think the big misunderstanding is that treating uncertainty as a problem to be solved.

When we're making any sort of decision at a crossroads like this, we might think that there will be certainty if we just bang our head against the wall at the right angle, or we just talk to the right person or have the right couples therapist.

But often when we're at these crossroads, whether it's a career crossroads, in a relationship, what have you, you often have to make a decision and commit in spite of the uncertainty or the doubt that you feel.

One of my favorite quotes is from this guy named Rollo May, and he said, commitment is healthiest not in the absence of doubt, but in spite of doubt.

I think making decisions in spite of uncertainty, one, is an inevitable part of being alive.

And two, it gives you an opportunity to build your character, to make decisions on behalf of the type of person that you want to be.

Well, the big thing that I got talking to the couple was that it helped them figure out who they were.

So one of the things that I think is really important when we're in these moments of uncertainty is to have a clear sense of who you are and what your values are so that you can make a choice.

And even if it doesn't work out, you can still be proud of the choice that you made.

So I'll give you an analogy from the business world.

So in the past, you've had Brian Chesky on this show.

In the pandemic, he lost 80% of his business at Airbnb.

And he had to make all of these decisions in spite of not knowing exactly how they'll turn out.

And the first thing that he did is he wrote down a list of his values, these principles that he was going to stand by during the pandemic.

One was to keep all stakeholders in mind.

Two was to try to win the next travel season.

Three was to not be the villain.