Stacy London
speaker
125 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Stacy London’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
Weil once you know your shape and once you know the shapes that fit your shape, which again also takes a little bit of work to understand. But that's what Dress Your Best was about, the book that Clinton and I wrote. That's geometry, that's color forms. Do you need more volume on top, more volume on bottom? How do you work those things out? It's like putting a puzzle together.
Dann musst du dein Gehirn, weil das ist, wo der Stil beginnt, zu stoppen, zu denken, was mir früher gut aussah, sieht jetzt nicht gut aus. Was du denken musst, ist, hier ist das Körper. Ich weiß, was ich mag, und ich weiß, was ich nicht mag. Ich beginne von Anfang an. Ich beginne mit dem Körper, das ich heute habe. And then you think about what in my closet compliments me still and what does not.
And I don't mean compliments or flattering in a way that's just patriarchal. Like, look at me, pick me, all that bullshit. In a way that makes you feel however you want to feel. For me, when I was younger on What Not to Wear, I wanted to feel sexy. I wore tight, you know, pencil skirts and five inch heels. And I wanted people to be like, she's kind of hot.
Ich fühle mich nicht in der gleichen Weise. I go to the gym because I want to be stronger every day, because I want to walk when I'm 85. And that is a question of perspective. Your perspective changes as you age. Your priorities change as you age. And if you can think about that across every aspect of your life, every aspect of your life will only get better.
You have to allow for things to be different. And we hate change. As humans, we hate it. We hate it. We're afraid of it. We're terrified. Who moves my cheese? That's what I always think about. What? Change? And also I saw it in my grandmother. I see it in my mom. There's a narrowing of what feels safe if we don't stay out there.
You want things to be organized in a certain way. I remember moving my mom's aspirin or something. She was like, put it back where you found it. Those are things your world will get smaller if you don't go out and do big things. You gotta do big things. You're always doing big things.
If it's family, you can't get rid of them, right? You can just be like, nobody asked for your opinion, Mom, thanks, right? That's one, I think it's really important to stand up for yourself. Like, and what not to wear, there was a sign that said, no miniskirts after 35, because at that time, we said, look, this is not age appropriate. If it works for you. I don't care.
I don't care whether you're skinny or you're curvy or you're plus size or you're petite or you're an extra tall. I don't care. If you feel the way you want to feel in that miniskirt, there is nobody who can tell you otherwise. And you can tell your family to stuff it. Ich liebe das. Ich denke, wir müssen das hören. We've said age appropriate for a long time. We've also put too much value.
And this is where I talk about societal and contextual. We put a lot of value on what other people think. Now, what you wear matters if it is going to get you what you want as well. So, for example, I always talk about the suit. If you are job interviewing at a bank that's 200 years old and it's old and it's The latex suit could work at the bank too, depending on how you want to show things off.
Depending on what you're there for. How you want things to shake out. So like maybe somebody hires you at the bank just not to work at the bank. Right. But I'm just saying contextually, we want people to accept us so we can move further in our lives. That's what that public opinion should be about. Public opinion by itself should make no difference in our sense of self. It's so hard.
Yeah, I wish that I had really understood that I was lacking so much self-esteem as a child, because then I would have known what to work on. I remember that You know, I'm a New York City kid, right? My parents got divorced when I was four. They threw me into therapy because that's what you did in the 70s.
Your parents get divorced, you throw the kid into therapy so she doesn't become like a serial killer or whatever. I don't know. But I didn't know what was wrong with me. I didn't know what I was feeling. And I, for a long time, felt that I... I look back on those child therapists and I'm like, they should not have a license. I mean, a lot of them just did nothing but sort of actually... Wow.
Und wirklich, wiederum, das ist alles Arbeit, die du selbst tun musst. Es ist großartig, als ein early childhood development. Oh Gott, hier gehe ich. Ich bin ein bisschen intellektuell. Michael Winnicott spricht über early childhood development und sagt, dass einer der Wege, wie Kinder wirklich ihre eigene Person werden. How did you figure out you were missing it?
You know, by my actions, really by who I have spent time with. Also... What I've settled for in my life, you know, staying in jobs for longer than I wanted to, being with partners that were probably wrong for me. I think that a lot of choices that I've made in my life, I chose things out of a low sense of self-esteem, a low sense of self-worth and really no self-awareness.
Self-awareness, that is, it is hard to face the dark side of yourself. It is hard to face the ugly, mean, yucky, spiteful, jealous, gross, awful side of yourself. Do you feel like you do it now? I do.
No, no, no. Because you have to face those things and accept them. Not be embarrassed and ashamed of them. Because again, that shadow side of yourself, that darker side of yourself... We all have it. And to ignore it is to live in a way that is not aware, right?
Instead of just being mean and spiteful because I've been triggered, now I can say, wow, somebody triggered me and I am feeling really mean and spiteful. Okay, what am I going to do with that? Well, now I know to talk about it. I feel mean, I feel spiteful, I feel awful, I feel so angry, I feel this.
It would have been amazing. But it would have been amazing to know that it was okay to admit to feeling like a shitty person instead of trying to hide it and be perfect and lovely all the time, like most women are taught to do. So anytime a woman is called unlikable or difficult, I struggle with that because I'm like... Who says that she's unlikable and difficult? And why?
Because if you have boundaries and you are a person who knows themselves and knows their worth, you're not going to put up with a bunch of shit.
Of course you can. And I used to be afraid of those people because I was like, wow, they're so strong, so tough. And now those are the people I admire most.
Showing 101–120 of 125 · page 6 of 7
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