Steven

But it's still happening over and over again. They're still living out the same pattern in their life and still getting the same results and dissatisfaction. So when we think about trauma at an early age that results in this sort of cyclical pattern of getting same behavior, same results, I wondered if you had a perspective on how one can let go of that and therefore break the pattern.

But it's still happening over and over again. They're still living out the same pattern in their life and still getting the same results and dissatisfaction. So when we think about trauma at an early age that results in this sort of cyclical pattern of getting same behavior, same results, I wondered if you had a perspective on how one can let go of that and therefore break the pattern.

And then train those.

And then train those.

Those new patterns. We don't often think about training some of the virtues that we want to acquire and the patterns we want to have. We kind of think that we have to select them and then we'll do our best to live them. But the idea that I might have to train...

Those new patterns. We don't often think about training some of the virtues that we want to acquire and the patterns we want to have. We kind of think that we have to select them and then we'll do our best to live them. But the idea that I might have to train...

certain new behaviors is a really compelling one because you're right in the context of any physical development i have to go to the gym and i have to do my repetitions to build that thing that strength but i um was just thinking about creating a training regimen from for certain behaviors and new patterns that i want in my life and trying to make sure i do them every day which is not something that i've i've ever considered

certain new behaviors is a really compelling one because you're right in the context of any physical development i have to go to the gym and i have to do my repetitions to build that thing that strength but i um was just thinking about creating a training regimen from for certain behaviors and new patterns that i want in my life and trying to make sure i do them every day which is not something that i've i've ever considered

Three months ago, you became a dad to a young boy, to a young son. Yes. So you're now in the process of raising a man yourself. And there's a lot of dialogue at the moment in the UK, but also just broadly in the Western world around what it is to be a man and how to raise men.

Three months ago, you became a dad to a young boy, to a young son. Yes. So you're now in the process of raising a man yourself. And there's a lot of dialogue at the moment in the UK, but also just broadly in the Western world around what it is to be a man and how to raise men.

I think much of this dialogue has been sparked by some shocking statistics that show young men are struggling now more than ever in various ways. I think the single biggest killer of men under the age of 45 is themselves. And also there's just an overarching sense of, I think, purposeless meaninglessness that they're struggling in school more so than women are.

I think much of this dialogue has been sparked by some shocking statistics that show young men are struggling now more than ever in various ways. I think the single biggest killer of men under the age of 45 is themselves. And also there's just an overarching sense of, I think, purposeless meaninglessness that they're struggling in school more so than women are.

Some forecasts predict that for every two women that graduate university or college, only one man will graduate in the near future. And it's pretty shocking. So when I think about the way that you're intent on raising your young man, but also what it is that young men in particular are missing in their lives, I wondered if you had... had an answer.

Some forecasts predict that for every two women that graduate university or college, only one man will graduate in the near future. And it's pretty shocking. So when I think about the way that you're intent on raising your young man, but also what it is that young men in particular are missing in their lives, I wondered if you had... had an answer.

Why do you think so many young men are struggling?

Why do you think so many young men are struggling?

You gave a TED Talk in 2020, almost five years ago now, about the five hindrances. What are the five hindrances? You described them as five mental states that are holding us back

You gave a TED Talk in 2020, almost five years ago now, about the five hindrances. What are the five hindrances? You described them as five mental states that are holding us back

When we think about this first hindrance of sensual desire... Is this where discipline comes into play? The idea of discipline, because that word is often used, but it's often lacking a clear definition, but also a clear understanding of how one attains and exhibits discipline. Because when I think about the things that require me to have discipline, it is these desires. It is the five gates.

When we think about this first hindrance of sensual desire... Is this where discipline comes into play? The idea of discipline, because that word is often used, but it's often lacking a clear definition, but also a clear understanding of how one attains and exhibits discipline. Because when I think about the things that require me to have discipline, it is these desires. It is the five gates.