Stu Burguiere

And you have changed my life.

And I truly thank you for that, you quitter.

And...

So today, I mean, we're not really saying goodbye to Stu because, I mean, if history teaches us anything, it's that goodbyes with Stu's are more a little like intermissions.

You know, he leaves, he fails.

It's kind of a little more like, hey, we'll see you after the snack bar situation.

You know what I mean?

I don't know where that's coming from.

Stu started as an intern, which means at one point in his life, he fetched coffee and thought, you know, I might be able to do better than this.

And to his credit,

He did.

He was producer, executive producer, head writer of the program, which is not really a career ladder.

That's more of like a hostile takeover, you know, conducted with sarcasm and impeccable timing.

And he has been with me for 28 years, which is longer than most Hollywood marriages, longer than both of our marriages, longer than most governments last.

Longer than the average Eagles Super Bowl window, you know, and here we are.

Here we are again because Stu is leaving again.

I just want to let, I mean, just let's be clear.

He left this show once to start his own show and it failed and spectacularly.

None of this is true.

failure is the failure is real i mean it wasn't a dignified creative differences kind of failure this was like come crawling back like a vietnam vet looking for his old platoon kind of thing you know and i welcome him back