Tyler Perry
speaker
187 appearances
2 recordings
2 series
first heard Jan 2025
last heard Feb 2025
Tyler Perry’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
But no, it was the same show. And every year I would try to do it, it would fail. But there was somebody in the audience out of every show, this is what I call a ram in the bush, who wanted to invest in it every time. The most I saw was probably 1,400 people in New Orleans in a theater that sat 3,000. But out of that, somebody said, well, let's keep this going.
Because during this time, there were a lot of plays, these black shows that were traveling the country and making lots of money for black people. It was on something that's affectionately called the Chitlin Circuit. The rename's weird. Urban... There's a rename? Yeah, they rebranded it. Oh, well... Kind of like Aunt Jemima. You have to rebrand it. I'm just going to call this shit what it is.
The chilling circuit is when black performers could not perform in white establishments. They would travel all over the South into all of these different places and become famous among their own people. So here I am doing this play in the early 90s. and hitting some of these spots where black people were allowed to go everywhere.
But the spirit of the Chitlin' Circuit was still there where black people supported each other. And for my play to not work all of those years, then in 1998, take off one night. So the play itself didn't change all that much. It didn't change. You know what changed? The play was about adult survivors of child abuse who had forgiven their abuser because it was a happy ending.
They all forgave the abuser, the woman who did all this stuff to them. And I hadn't forgiven my father. So it was hypocritical that I'm in this seat and I'm talking about forgiveness and it hadn't happened for me. So in 98, he and I got into a really heated argument, the man who raised me and I forgave him. And that is when the show changed. Oh, wow. It was spiritual for me.
I went from nobody being in the audience to having eight sold out shows after I forgave him. And the forgiveness was such a scary thing for me because I didn't realize how powerful it was for me. It was my anchor. You're with me. What are you thinking? You got something on your mind to say?
The ripping away of my anger toward him was like a car that kind of runs on gasoline. Then all of a sudden you fill it with diesel and say, go be motivated. Because everything I was doing, every time I was trying to work, it was like, I'm going to make some money. I'm going to take care of my mother. I'm going to prove to you that I am something because you said I wasn't shit.
Once that was gone and I forgave him, it didn't matter anymore. I had no motivation to keep going, even though the purest sense of where I started was about making enough money to take care of my mother so she didn't have to be with him. So forgiving him ripped that from me. I had to figure out, OK, how do you operate now? I also found this out in therapy.
I shifted from the anger to caregiving, and I did not know that my caregiving was a problem. Is the caregiving still an attempt to be safe? The caregiving is an attempt to save everybody else.
I would expect that if I'm kind to you, you'll be kind to me or you'd be kind to somebody else. However, it doesn't work that way. However, yes, I let all that go years ago. I gave up expectations, which was a problem.
That's the same. Wow. I gave up expectations because I thought if I'm good to this person, if I'm kind to this person, if I'm doing this and they give me their ass to kiss or just become horrible, then I'm going to feel bad because they did that rather than going. I'm just going to be good to you whether you do whatever you want to do or not. You do what works for you.
I'm just going to be good to you. Right. For me, for me, because my entire life was based on the anger and now I've shifted. So I've got to do this for me. But where it became a problem, and I could not wrap my brain around this when I first started talking to these folks, they were saying, Tyler, caregiving is a problem. I'm like, how is that a problem? It's such a good thing.
It's a problem if you're using it to cover what you're dealing with. So I was caring for everybody else. So I wasn't dealing with what I was dealing with or going through.
This is beyond suspicious. I have a tremendous amount of people who need a lot of help.
Yeah.
That's incredibly kind. Thank you, Monica. I appreciate it. It's good when people will acknowledge it and say it. So it's really great. Thank you.
I set limits on how far I'm going to go. I'm going to help you to this point. And you've got to get up and be on your own because I'm not going to let you be dependent on me for everything. And then they get angry because of where you stop.
I've seen that, of course. Yeah. But listen, it's OK. It's not OK, but it's life. You keep moving. You deal with their anger, whatever way it comes. But I always know my intention. My intention is pure.
There's another option there because I found this out because I was helping so many people and they just kept coming back, kept coming back. Oh, I need this. I need that. I was praying about it. I clearly hear this voice, which I believe inside of me to be the voice of God. It's like, stop. You are blocking a midnight. And I thought about that.
I went back and looked at what midnight represented in the Bible. Sometimes God designs midnights for people to go through. And if you run and rescue them all the time, you're not making them better. You've robbed them of the thing that would make them better. That might change them. Or be that thing that gets them up and gets them on their feet and gets them going. The catalyst.
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