Unknown (main narrator, possibly Aaron Tracy)

When Anne Hathaway was preparing for her role in a film called Eileen a few years ago, she, quote, got a lot of inspiration from Patricia Neal, specifically from a coffee commercial that she did.

Hathaway continues, Such a weird reference, Anne, but I totally hear it, and I totally agree.

But while Neil might be hypnotizing to me and Anne Hathaway in this commercial, Dahl's attention is drawn to the beautiful young woman standing just out of frame.

He quickly makes a game plan.

He decides to totally ignore her, just as he ignored Neil at Lillian Hellman's dinner party all those years before.

That's his move.

The day after the coffee commercial, again mirroring what he did with Neil all those years ago, he begins to pursue.

Felicity, to her credit, totally rebuffs him.

He's a married man, but as usual, Dahl isn't phased.

He decides to orchestrate a really convoluted plan that feels like it was ripped out of a bad sitcom.

As she's rejecting him, Felicity mentions she has an upcoming trip to Paris.

That's when Dahl strikes.

He asks her, would you mind terribly picking up my favorite umbrella?

I left it in Paris at my friend Annabella's place.

Now, you may remember that Annabella is Dahl's actress ex-girlfriend.

She's the one that Dahl chose to go up on stage in front of millions of people and accept the Oscar on his wife's behalf.

And now she's going to repay the favor.

What follows is less the retrieval mission of an umbrella and more an elaborate ambush.

Felicity gets to Paris and shows up at Annabelle's apartment, expecting the umbrella.

And this better be like an umbrella made out of gold if she schlepped all the way here for it.