Venerable Ajahn Chah

Personally, I didn't know much about the theory of practice.

I'd been a monk for three years and still had a lot of questions about what Samadhi actually was.

I kept trying to think about it and figure it out as I meditated, but my mind became even more restless and distracted than it had before.

the amount of thinking actually increased.

When I wasn't meditating, it was more peaceful.

Boy, was it difficult.

So exasperating.

But even though I encountered so many obstacles, I never threw in the towel.

I just kept on doing it.

When I wasn't trying to do anything in particular,

my mind was relatively at ease.

But whenever I determined to make the mind unify in Samadhi, it went out of control.

What's going on here?

I wondered.

Why is this happening?

Later on, I began to realize

that meditation was comparable to the process of breathing.

If we're determined to force the breath to be shallow, deep, or just right, it's very difficult to do.

However, if we go for a stroll and we're not even aware of when we're breathing in or out, it's extremely relaxing.

So I reflected.