Victor (Vic) Strecher

At the same time, you may need to learn to say no as well.

Wonderful question from Julie.

I think I'm going to separate the word goal from the word purpose.

So a goal is achievable.

I mean, almost by nature, a goal typically is something that there is a possibility of achieving.

Now, goals are very close to purpose, but purpose doesn't necessarily need to be achievable.

It needs to be aspirational.

So I may aspire to teaching every one of my students as if they're my own daughter.

That's probably not achievable.

But it is aspirational.

In other words, I go into the class with the mindset or into my office hours with the mindset that I am going to try to do that.

That becomes a purpose, a direction, an intention of mine, but not necessarily a goal that's achievable.

So the two are different.

And I have to accept the fact that the purposes I have in my life are not going to necessarily be met.

Well, first of all, there is another episode that you did with a person named Tony Burrow, Anthony Burrow at Cornell.

And Tony Burrow is a developmental psychologist.

So he focuses a lot on that developmental process.

And he's one of the world's experts on purpose.

So first of all, I'd suggest you go to that episode and listen, because it's such a powerful episode.

But what I would suggest, and I have worked with kids, different times, different situations.