Will Friedle

I wish I had a way.

I don't.

It's crap.

Yeah.

Too long.

No, it's just it's not crap.

It's just too long.

And when it comes to, by the way, again, reiterating, didn't hate this movie, but didn't love this movie.

Everyone else is like, Cadet Kelly is the thing.

Loved some of the performances.

And when it comes to writers, we've got Gail Parent, a seasoned TV writer who cut her teeth on some classics like Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman, The Carol Burnett Show, and Golden Girls, Three Juggernauts.

But she's also a two-time Emmy winner for the Tracy Ullman-led TV show Tracy Takes On.

But not a lot of movies on Parent's IMDb page.

We've got the main event starring Barbra Streisand and Ryan O'Neill, Disney's Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen starring Lizzie Lohan, and this movie.

And as is a common occurrence with DCOMs to see, we shared a credit with a relative newcomer.

And Cadet Kelly, of course, is no different.

We've got Michael Walsh.

His only credits are an episode of American Masters and Cadet Kelly and the narration parts for the 1999 video version of the musical Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

The journalist slash author was mostly politically focused, writing for the San Francisco Examiner, the New York Times, Vanity Fair and many others.

And now it's time for a cinematic obstacle course.