Zadie Smith

I mean, there's decrepitude, like you can't see me, but I'm speaking to you with an eye patch on because I've got macular degeneration.

So I had an operation on my right eye.

So there's that feeling of vulnerability.

I've been so lucky.

Again, I'm rarely ill, rarely having any physical difficulties.

So there's that shock of like, oh, yeah, here it comes.

this reminder of your human weakness.

So there's that.

Trying to work out what kind of a sick person you're going to be.

Are you going to be the kind who talks about it endlessly on the radio?

Are you going to be the kind who just soldiers on bravely and barely mentions it?

I don't know.

You find out.

I always love that line of Salman Rushdie.

He says, our lives teach us who we are.

That's how it is.

You can have all kinds of ideas about who you are, but your life shows you.

So I'm kind of finding out as I go along.

I am prone to self-pity when it comes to a cold, but I'm realizing when it's something more serious like this, I do kind of want to just get on with it.

When you're a writer, the thing about being self-sufficient is very strong.