From Rock Bottom to Award-Winning Therapist | Ben Kaye | A Bunch of Therapists Podcast | Episode 14

This episode contains discussion around addiction, rehab, grooming, cuckoo'ing, and chemsex. 🎧 Join us for an incredibly honest and inspiring conversation with counsellor and campaigner Ben Kaye as he shares his remarkable journey from addiction and breakdown to becoming an award-winning therapist specialising in LGBTQ+ substance misuse and chemsex support. This powerful episode reveals how life can completely change course twice - first when Ben's parents divorced at 15, derailing his university dreams, and again at 37 when a "tsunami of personal circumstances" led to his breakdown and recovery journey. Hosted by: Michaela McCarthy (Founder of The Awareness Centre, The Awareness Centre Training School, and Creator and Host of A Bunch of Therapists Podcast. Senior BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and Influential Leader) and Dipti Solanki (Therapist, Coach & Consultant, Mental Health Trainer and Founder of Grief Matters 4 All CIC). In this compelling episode, Ben openly shares: • How his parents' divorce at 15 changed his life trajectory overnight • Working in the City for 20+ years whilst feeling completely stuck • Using substances from age 15 to 37 as a way to change how he felt • His mental breakdown at 37 and the dangerous situations he found himself in • Walking through the doors of a Lambeth drug and alcohol service • His transformative three months in rehab in Bournemouth • Discovering he could retrain and pursue education for the first time since leaving school • Launching Dorset's first LGBTQ+ recovery groups and chemsex support services • Completing his counselling qualifications and psychology master's degree This profoundly moving conversation offers hope and practical guidance for anyone struggling with addiction, identity, or feeling trapped in their circumstances. 🔍 Key Topics Discussed: • The impact of family breakdown on teenage development • Feeling stuck in careers that don't align with your true self • Substance use as emotional regulation and escape • The chemsex scene and its specific challenges • Finding culturally competent therapeutic support • The importance of being truly heard versus just listened to • How personal struggles can inform professional specialisation • Building LGBTQ+ specific services outside major cities • The difference between MSM (men who have sex with men) and gay identity • Practical advice on finding the right therapist Chapters: 00:00 Intro 01:20 Parents' divorce and life derailment at 15 05:30 Working in the City and feeling stuck 09:00 Substance use as coping mechanism 09:32 Mental breakdown at 37 11:50 Accessing drug and alcohol services 13:10 Rehab experience in Bournemouth 13:30 Chemsex explanation 14:45 Rehab in Bournemouth 19:20 Mental Health & Being Believed 20:14 Working in Drug & Alcohol Services as an Addictions Therapist 20:29 Grooming & Cuckoo'ing 20:50 LGTBQI Specific Therapy 22:58 Training to Become a Counsellor 23:20 Volunteering at a Drug & Alcohol Charity 23:54 Launching the Charity's First LGBTQ Recovery Group 24:52 Creating a Chemsex Drop In Clinic 25:46 Launching the Charity's First LGBTQ Webchat Facility 26:20 Therapy Training & Psychology Masters 27:48 The Next Chapter in Ben's Journey & Returning to The Awareness Centre 28:57 Meeting Clients Where They Are 29:50 Shame Around Sex & Behaviours Around Sex and Finding The Right Therapist 31:16 Male Prison Population & MSM 32:12 Ben's Message to Listeners Who Are Struggling 32:40 Being Listened to vs. Feeling Heard 35:00 Outro 🎬 Watch full episodes of A Bunch of Therapists on our YouTube channel 🎧 A Bunch of Therapists is available on all major podcast platforms 🗓️ New episodes every Thursday Follow A Bunch of Therapists on Social Media: YouTube: @ABunchofTherapistsTV TikTok: @a.bunch.of.therapists Instagram: @abunchoftherapists Facebook: A Bunch of Therapists LinkedIn: A Bunch of Therapists #TherapyUK #LGBTQTherapy #AddictionRecovery #ChemsexSupport #MentalHealthUK #SubstanceMisuse #TherapyTraining #RecoveryStory

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