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Adam Carolla Show

Patrick Muldoon (Carolla Classics)

24 Apr 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

1.769 - 46.7

Salkku X. We meet again. Five numbers. Five wishes. Estimates. Conclusions. Power. As a reward, the X-Pen G6 electric car is completely yours. 10 weeks to solve the code in the address power.fi.x. Don't miss it. Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni.

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46.74 - 57.271

This is the podcast where we play the best moments, highlights, and fan-selected clips from all 17 years of The Adam Corolla Show. If you'd like to hear any of the full episodes played today, make sure to check out Adam Corolla's sub stack, adamcorolla.substack.com.

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57.691 - 75.17

There you'll find the complete uncensored Adam Corolla Show archives, ad-free, along with the archives of The Adam and Dr. Drew Show, as well as the new podcast, Beat It Out. And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics at adamcorolla.com. Now let's get to the clips. This week, Patrick Muldoon passed away. He was a legendary guest on The Adam Carolla Show.

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75.19 - 93.573

He appeared once in 2012. Bald Brian, being a huge fan of Starship Troopers, was overjoyed. Allison was familiar with Saved by the Bell and his early career stint on the show. Overall, he was a really amazing guest. He was really cool, interesting. He was almost being too honest, where it's like, are you sure you should be this honest, buddy? All right.

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94.114 - 112.677

One of the most refreshing guests ever in the show's history. We've played clips of him before in classics. He's that good. An honor of his passing. I thought we'd play the entire episode in full. Rest in peace, Patrick. From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is The Adam Corolla Show.

113.258 - 122.071

Adam's guest today, Patrick Muldoon, plus Alison Rosen on news, Walt Bryan on sound effects, and a round of nerdwalking.

122.111 - 142.693 Adam Carolla

And now, long, cool woman in a black dress... Adam Carolla. Yeah. Get it on. Got to get it on. No choice but to get it on. Mandate. Get it on. He ain't heavy. He's my brother. People got to get into the hollies. That's a good band there. Good to see you, Alison Rosen.

142.714 - 143.635 Alison Rosen

Hello, Adam Carolla.

143.835 - 160.279 Adam Carolla

Good to see you, Bo Brown. I don't feel any sucking. Mm-hmm. A couple things. Some unfinished business. Stuff I'm looking... I forgot to bring up. First off, somebody tweeted... People tweet me this, everything I complain about, and then they tweet it back to me, which I appreciate, but...

Chapter 2: How did Patrick Muldoon impact the Adam Carolla Show?

208.504 - 229.28 Adam Carolla

And I wonder because I would find that guy and that guy would go, I just had to cough. And I'd be like, do you have a cold? Do you have a bronchial condition? Do you have a problem? Do you have a problem? Right. And they'd be like, no. And I'd be like, so you just felt like you had the need to cough for that one 10 second span. By the way, we've been talking for over 10 minutes.

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229.3 - 239.878 Adam Carolla

You haven't coughed once in this. There's a fake cough. No, I had a tickle in my throat. I think there's something going on with people. They're like, look at me.

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240.23 - 241.351 Alison Rosen

Yeah, now's my chance.

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241.431 - 263.114 Adam Carolla

But it's like they can't. This phlegm needs to be on center stage. They can't yell, look at me. So they just cough. Or there's, I mean, I do believe that everybody has a little bit of a sort of Tourette's syndrome, which is like when people come up to meet me, the more nervous they are, the more they fuck up their first sentence. Like they go, you've been a big fan of mine for a long time.

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263.555 - 263.655

Yeah.

263.635 - 266.662 Adam Carolla

I never correct them because I know what they mean.

266.762 - 267.684 Alison Rosen

It's a pleasure to meet me.

267.724 - 277.727 Adam Carolla

Yeah, they usually correct themselves. I hear people call in to talk radio shows all the time and call the host their name just because they're nervous.

278.388 - 282.437 Alison Rosen

When you're nervous, it's like... If someone yells hurry to me, I go...

Chapter 3: What are the main themes of the conversation about silence and public behavior?

544.166 - 558.023 Adam Carolla

Yeah. It makes it a little bit slippery. And then I said, why are they not on the ceiling in my kitchen? I was saying, I don't see them in the kitchen. Well, the kitchen is semi-gloss, too. And mine has this sort of plastic fake stamp ceiling. But it's not grippy.

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558.003 - 580.376 Adam Carolla

It doesn't feel... You know, the difference between semi-gloss and the difference between flat is one is sort of chalky and the other is wipe it clean. And the reason you go with semi-gloss in a kitchen is because when grease spatters on the backsplash or the wall or you spill or whatever, you can wipe it off with a sponge, meaning it's sort of a car finish versus a chalkboard finish.

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580.837 - 584.803 Adam Carolla

And I thought, when you're inverted constantly...

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584.783 - 586.645 Alison Rosen

Well, I have some experience with that.

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586.665 - 611.756 Adam Carolla

Yes. I think you like the grip of the flat better than the grip of the semi-gloss so that if you're a spider and you're going to be hanging around in Corolla's bedroom, you're going to hang out in this changing area, which is flat, rather than the bathroom. There's nothing in either area for you. Do you know what I'm saying? Just feeling secure with your legs. There's no food or anything.

611.816 - 632.578 Adam Carolla

I think the feeling of this one is better. And then I realized the ceiling's flat and they're on the ceiling. They're rarely on the wall. They'll probably be on the ceiling anyway. But I thought, I wonder if I put my clear glaze on the ceiling or I do a semi-gloss on the ceiling and I do a semi-gloss in this room if I can get them the fuck out of here. This is huge. At least off the ceiling.

632.678 - 635.581 Alison Rosen

If it works, then everyone can apply it. I'm going to Vaseline my walls.

635.781 - 636.542

I hate it.

636.522 - 660.323 Adam Carolla

I had a breakthrough, yes, and I don't think it's going to drive him out the house, but I really, to me, I don't really mind so much if the spider's in the kitchen or the pantry because I don't sleep in the pantry unless I'm really stoned. So that's only like three days a week, you know? Yeah. I don't like the idea. I'll tell you what bothers me.

Chapter 4: What are the reactions to Sherman Helmsley's death?

4167.937 - 4175.235 Alison Rosen

Well, also, Sherman Helmsley died from the Jeffersons and Celeb Rehab. I mean, not Celeb Rehab. Sorry, Surreal Life.

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4175.315 - 4180.799 Adam Carolla

That song was about fucking. For sure. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

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4180.819 - 4181.279 Alison Rosen

What was it?

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Chapter 5: How do societal views on age and death change?

4181.319 - 4184.143 Alison Rosen

Was it Jefferson's song? Fucking. About fucking?

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4184.163 - 4184.664 Adam Carolla

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

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4184.684 - 4185.464 Alison Rosen

They're moving on up.

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4185.485 - 4188.368 Adam Carolla

Oh, yeah. To the east side. Yeah, that's pussy. Yeah.

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Chapter 6: What are the implications of celebrity interactions with tragedy?

4188.829 - 4194.595 Adam Carolla

I'm sure. Come on, pussy. Uh-huh. Deluxe apartment. That's your cock. That's right. That's your cock. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh.

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4194.616 - 4195.777 Alison Rosen

Finally got a piece of the pie.

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4196.898 - 4201.464 Adam Carolla

Uh-huh. Hello. Hello. It's all there. It's all there. Yeah. I liked him.

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4201.704 - 4203.706 Alison Rosen

He was 74. He died in El Paso.

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4204.107 - 4204.187

See?

4204.353 - 4226.521 Adam Carolla

You know, tell me if this makes me an asswipe, but I was listening to the news, and I go, he was only 74, and I thought, that's not that bad. Like, you can't put the only in front of 70-whatever. Right. You can do it in the... In the 60s, if you can. Yeah, under 60 or 60-something, but only 74. You know, that's two or three years off, whatever the average age is, where dudes kick off.

4227.242 - 4240.956 Adam Carolla

I feel like he got a lot of living out of those years, and I loved that show when I was a kid. Weezy and... Speaking of super uptight white guys, they had the most uptightest of all the white guys who was upstairs, and he'd come down, and he'd be like... Postal wait?

4240.976 - 4241.476 Alison Rosen

Is that who it is?

4241.656 - 4251.104 Adam Carolla

No, but he looked just like him. Okay. And he'd come down, and he'd say, Hey, George, what it ain't, my sister? And then everyone would laugh, because he's a white guy.

Chapter 7: What thoughts does the speaker share about advertising and financial firms?

8159.729 - 8163.754 Adam Carolla

It's like, listen, I got a bloody Mary in me. I'm running fucking late. What am I looking at here?

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8163.734 - 8164.957 Alison Rosen

Yeah, what are you advertising?

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8164.977 - 8171.614 Adam Carolla

And then I don't even know. I feel like half these advertising, like these big firms, ITG, you know, like, what do you want me to do?

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8171.674 - 8172.356 Alison Rosen

Right.

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8172.436 - 8181.096 Adam Carolla

Like, should I take some of my money out of my bank account and put, I don't know what you guys are. Like, I know you do something with financial something. But I don't know what to do.

8181.396 - 8182.438 Alison Rosen

I think that's how they want it.

8182.898 - 8197.093 Adam Carolla

Is that how they want it? Are there people – but there's no ITG store at the airport? Like, is it just for – I mean, again, is it just for, like, Wall Street guys? Is it just for stockholders or something?

Chapter 8: How does the discussion shift towards personal experiences with financial advice?

8197.113 - 8201.158

What's the end goal when, like, your financial guy says you've got to put money in IGT? You're like, oh, I saw them on a bench ad.

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8201.338 - 8204.442 Adam Carolla

Yeah, so they must be good. They got the Griffin thing.

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8204.643 - 8205.725 Alison Rosen

You must have been in O'Hare.

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8205.785 - 8228.528 Adam Carolla

But I don't know what to do. I can tell you I've walked through a million airports and seen a million of these sort of ads. Some of them seem like social commentary mixed with semi-philanthropic, mixed with sort of a modern-day version of showing – it used to just show a bald eagle and it'd say rise above or something. And then you'd go, all right, I get it. It's corny, but I get it.

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8228.548 - 8237.896 Adam Carolla

But this is now too avant-garde. Like, I don't really understand. I can't slow down long enough to really drink it in. And I don't know what I'm supposed to do with it. I just feel like I'm being bombarded with it.

8237.916 - 8239.32

You're like, I don't want to talk to Chuck.

8240.33 - 8263.597 Adam Carolla

I don't know what it does. I don't know what they're paying for. I get the feeling some of these things are just to be seen by the people that work at the place. So they feel like they're working at a cool place. I understand a movie poster and I understand the Cinnabon posters. You know, like I understand the right around the corner and over here. And I understand that.

8263.717 - 8284.461 Adam Carolla

Oh, when in Cincinnati, definitely swing by Ruth Chris Steakhouse like that. I understand this is getting way too out. There should be some sort of sanctioning body that goes, that's too confusing. People have to stop. They're going to ask questions. Yeah, I don't know. They don't know what to do. And I don't need it in the jet way going down the thing. I think it slows things down.

8284.441 - 8293.712 Adam Carolla

I wanted just big fat arrows going, shake your ass. All right. Where were we? Oh, speaking of advertising. Oh, do we have an outro, by the way? It's been a while.

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