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Am I doing it wrong? For Doctors by Doctors.

23: TELL ME I'M PRETTY (Valentine's Special)

13 Feb 2024

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Sticks and stones may break my bones but SILENCE… Well, it makes me a wee little bit crazy…   Negative feedback is not the only place that our minds can spin out on us. For many of us, we have a painful reaction to receiving no feedback at all. In that space, our mind fills in the gaps between people's (in)action and their implications.   Specifically, the situation we're talking about is when we're consciously or subconsciously expecting recognition or positive feedback ad we don't get it. We make a simple calculation: if positive feedback means I'm on track, I'm not failing, I'm good enough.    … Well then, a lack of positive feedback means I'm not on track  … I'm a failure  … I'm not enough    You personally may not recognise such blatant statements filling this space in your mind, but nonetheless, this episode is here to encourage you to notice where you have unmet expectations that a reaping havoc on your happiness and confidence.   This is particularly important for those of us working as doctors or in the healthcare in general as a culture that hasn't got a lot of positive feedback (or feedback of any flavour) built in. This isn't something that is going to rapidly and dramatically change, so let's do what we can to best support ourselves to show up and have the experience we want.    In what situations do you have quiet expectations of positive feedback? Where do you notice your brain jump in and fill the gaps? We'd love to hear. (TELL ME I'M PRETTY) 

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