BAD AT KEEPING SECRETS
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Episodes
This Is Why You Are Tired...
15 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Almost everything will work again if you unplug for a few mintues inclduing you.-Anne LemottHey, it’s Carissa, and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets. T...
How to slow down and find magic again...
08 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In celebration of darkness, this week I want to revisit my chat with Katherine May, a best-selling author and podcast host, of whom I adore in so many...
What If Motherhood Wasn’t Meant to Be Solo?
10 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hi, it’s Carissa, and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets.For the past few months, when people have asked what I am reading, I have replied a book about ...
How to know when you need to leave...
21 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Today I’m joined by Jessica Baum, a psychotherapist and the author of Safe: A New Way of Looking at Attachment. Her book comes out next week! I pro...
To Love Someone More Than Love Itself
13 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
More Than Love: A Conversation on Grief, Legacy, and Becoming OurselvesThere are some stories that never stop unfolding, they just shift shape as we m...
What Safe Feels Like.
29 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Today I’m joined by Jessica Baum, a psychotherapist and the author of Safe: A New Way of Looking at Attachment. In our conversation, Jessica opens u...
Wanting Both: Motherhood and Art
22 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Before we start I just wanted to invite you to come hang with Ruthie Ackerman and I at Womb House Books on Wednesday, September 24 · 6:30 - 8:30pm PD...
Ask this post a question
27 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What if you had a magic 8 ball… but it actually knew you? And instead of spitting out “Ask again later,” it handed you a question so sharp, or s...
Holding the s**t show of grief.
23 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hi. It’s Carissa and this is bad at keeping secrets. How do you feel sad? What does grief look like? This week I have the pleasure sit down with Car...
Saying the Quiet Things Out Loud
17 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Need permission to share your story? This episode is for you.This week, I talk with psychologist and author Dr. Jessica Zucker about grief, vulnerabil...
There is Enough for YOU with Jennifer Pastiloff
26 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Proof of Life. Proof of Enough.This week, I had the joy of talking with Jennifer Pastiloff, bestselling author of On Being Human, about her powerful n...
I have a crush on...
16 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hi, it’s Carissa, and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets. Are you an anxious person? I am. So when I saw the headline “This book is for anxious women,...
What is enoughness?
19 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Wanting Both: Motherhood, Art, and the Questions That LingerHi, it's Carissa, and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets.For the longest time, I believed I’...
The Short Magnificent Life of Flowers
24 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hi, it's Carissa, and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets. Before I had a kid, my garden was my holy place. Still is, just things are a little more wild no...
What to do when you get dumped.
07 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hey everyone, it is Carissa and this is Bad at Keeping Secrets. What to do when you get dumped? There is no real guide, telling you how to actually ju...
What if we stayed? The sacred space is already here.
24 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I am what they call a runner. I felt a connection with Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride—the idea that if you don’t like your situation in life, you ...
How to feel alive again.
03 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We can control whether we merely endure our days or experience and enjoy them. We can control whether we arrive on our deathbeds feeling like we've wa...
What is the point of art?
27 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Hi, it’s Carissa, and welcome to Bad at Keeping Secrets! Today, I’m chatting with Liana Finck, an amazing cartoonist, author, and regular contribu...
It's not you. It's your stress.
11 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
What is your stress telling you? Just curious… Mine is that I need to change my expectations for myself…Before we got sick, and then my business s...
What if the great love of your life was friendship?
20 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
“Inside our words and actions, the people we love live on through us.”-Lissa Soep, Other People’s WordsWhat makes us… well us? What makes our ...
How to create meaning.
15 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Recently, I read something somewhere that admitting you were lonely was one of the most shameful things someone could do. And yet, I do it all the tim...
Do you wonder if you are doing more? You are.
25 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We are in this amazing moment where we are trying to make a more equitable future by the ways that we structure our time and resources. We have never ...
Setting Yourself Up For Failure.
19 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
“To witness one life's miserable devastation and see her reach, instead, for joy. Let your life rest on what is already good. It's just another day ...
Avoidance of pain leads to more pain.
29 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I grew up thinking that addiction was not something that ran in my family. So I didn’t have to worry about it. My parents were both not really into ...
Why do we avoid rest?
08 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I have known Ashley Neese for years. We met when we gave a talk together in the winter of 2019. I have been obsessed with her ever since. Her new book...
Is depression a character flaw or illness?
11 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
“It's startling to realize how narrowly we avoid, or miss, living radically different lives.” - Rachel AvivHave you ever wondered why your life wo...
How to slow down and...
03 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In celebration of darkness, this week I want to revisit my chat with Katherine May, a best-selling author and podcast host, of whom I adore in so many...
What is a lie? The unraveling of our shared reality...
13 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
“...sometimes, when something is such an integral part of your life, it's hard to see where the raw material ends, and the inspiration begins.”Sar...
How to feel alive again.
23 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We can control whether we merely endure our days or experience and enjoy them. We can control whether we arrive on our deathbeds feeling like we've wa...
Can AI tell how you're feeling?
03 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
This week, I’m revisiting a topic that is a little scary but also extremely hopeful. A few months ago, I had the pleasure of talking with Grace Chan...
Knowing what your body needs
27 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Lately I have been feeling under the weather without actually being sick with a fever - does that ever happen to you? I have a sneaking suspicion it i...
What makes life worth living?
13 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
The idea that the universe is ultimately meaningless is something that I have been sifting through all of my life. Meaning is super sexy, offering an ...
How to actually do the thing.
30 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
The older I get the more dubious I am of how much control we actually have over our lives. And question if the systems of knowledge familiar to us are...
When does positivity become toxic?
23 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
This week, I am super excited to revisit and share Whitney Goodman’s work with you. As someone who is drawn to the beauty inherent in sadness, I hav...
Should I quit or should I stay?
09 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
So, you came here for help. I am guessing. You want to know if you should leave your partner, quit your job, unfriend someone, leave the city you grew...
How to steal like an artist
25 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
“Everything that needs to be said has already been said. But since no one was listening, everything must be said again.”―André GideI’ve been ...
"Should I have a baby?"
11 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
A few months ago, I wrote about resources for people who were on the fence about if they wanted to have kids or not. Perhaps it is something that you ...
Where is the line between inspiration and copy?
04 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Where do we draw the line between inspiration and copying someone else’s original idea? Do any of us ever have original ideas? I had the chance to s...
We're a molecule away from madness
28 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Sara Manning Peskin takes on the idea of "madness" in her book A Molecule Away From Madness: Tales of the Hijacked Brain. It reads like a detective no...
Where does the mind stop and the world begin?
21 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
What would it mean to think outside of your brain? I am fascinated by the idea that we can think with our bodies, our surroundings, and our relationsh...
Everybody is trying to manage their pain
14 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
This week I am talking to Aamina Ahmad, author of The Return of Faraz Ali. Her book is about a murder, but it is like no other “murder mystery” I ...
What does a secure relationship look like?
07 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Hi friends, hi,I hope this week treated you gently and with care. And if it didn’t, well, then I am extra glad for us that it is the weekend.I have ...
How can we use our own imperfections to understand others?
30 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
I spend a lot of time thinking about how to make sense of this world that we live in - holding multiple truths, reconciling feeling like we know nothi...
Perfect is the enemy of the good
23 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Emma Straub’s paperback release of her NY Times Bestseller This Time Tomorrow is coming to us soon on May 16! She kicks off her book tour very soon ...
What do we do with our regrets?
16 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Regrets… I have some experience in this area because: a) I am a highly sensitive person, and b) I am always looking backwards. Always. I am a person...
Does laziness actually exist?
09 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever considered yourself a lazy person? I would say I do, when I walk past the sink of dirty dishes, telling myself I will do it later when i...
Is all love unconditional?
02 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt unconditionally loved? I guess I should start by defining what I mean when I say, Unconditional Love. I grew up with the understand...
We are not getting enough touch...
26 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
I am personally super fascinated by how our relationships with tech have changed the course of human friendships, romance, and family. How the communi...
How to accept ourselves as we already are
19 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Can you accept yourself as you are? Do you ever feeling like shame is running the show?Today, we revisit my conversation with Lisa Olivera, a writer a...
Why do we like to listen to sad music?
12 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
“Longing itself is a creative and spiritual state.” —Susan CainRecently, I have been spending a lot of time trying to define (and find meaning i...
Why we shouldn't wait for something to go wrong
05 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever wonder why we think our brains are separate from our bodies? In this week’s episode, author and psychologist (and former finalist of the...
How can we find wonder and awe in anxious times?
26 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Katherine May’s new book, Enchantment, comes out this week! Feb 28 in the US and March 9 for the UK - preorder here (preordering a book is super imp...
How to Be Okay When Things Don't Feel Okay
19 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Is comparison the thief of joy? Most days I think I can confidently say that I’m content with where I’m at, happy even, excited to celebrate in th...
How to move forward without closure
12 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us have a complicated understanding of the statement, “Things Were Meant To Be.” I know I do. So does Katie Hawkins-Gaar. It’s a concept...
Can we live a "good" life without suffering?
05 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
**Transcription of audio can be found at the end of this post**Humans are social beings, and we are happier, and better, when connected to others.- P...
What happens when we don't feel held?
29 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
**Transcription of audio can be found at the end of this post** This year, I’ve been curious about how holidays like Valentine’s may perpetuate co...
How to actually get through heartbreak
22 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
**Transcription of audio can be found at the end of this post** Florence Williams is a journalist, author, and podcaster. Her book, Heartbreak: A Pers...
Admitting life is hard can be a relief
15 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
There is something inherently beautiful in the human condition and being able to experience the entire range of emotions, both good and bad. But there...
How to Expand Time to Be Happier
08 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
I am not the kind of person who wants to be happy all the time. Actually, I am a wallower - sitting in pain is somehow worthy of time. But sometimes I...