Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
In our next episode at Club Random Classics, we visit my conversation with the one and only Lisa Kudrow. You know her from Friends, but you haven't heard the audition story so awkward it almost ended her career. We dig into sitcom madness, jaw-dropping backstage stories, and a surprisingly deep chat about acting. I even confess which Lisa series I secretly love, and it isn't what you think.
Oh, wait, we're not supposed to hug because of the mics. Can you still hear it?
Chapter 2: What was Lisa Kudrow's most awkward audition experience?
And the Omicron. I said, oh, no, I don't hug because of Omicron. Oh, I have none of that. And then I forgot because I saw it. I'm full of monkey pox. No, that's the old Dean Martin show where he didn't know who the guest was.
Chapter 3: What backstage stories reveal the madness of sitcom sets?
Do you remember that? No. You don't? You don't remember the Dean Martin show? No. Really? Really.
Chapter 4: Which of Lisa's shows is Bill Maher secretly a fan of?
You're too young for that? Well, I might be a little. Unless my parents watched it. I don't think they did. I bet you your mother did. My mother had such a pussy boner for Dean Martin in that show. He was a very attractive guy. Yeah. And of course, that character he played, sort of a character who was like drunk, he really wasn't drunk, but he did really. Oh, he really wasn't, ever? No. Really?
But he really did only show up for the taping. So he had these three broads called the gold diggers, something you would never. Wait, no, that sounds familiar. Yes. And they would lead him, literally lead him, and prop him up in front of the card, which he would read, and fuck up, which made it funnier. Right, right, right.
And there was one section of the show where he didn't, he walked, it was at the piano with this piano guy tinkling, and it was like, and the door would open. I'd tell if it's Geraldine or if it's Sammy Davis. He had no idea. I really think that was true.
Chapter 5: How did The Andy Griffith Show influence Bill Maher's views on animal rights?
Oh, my God. I did know. I mean, I've been asking from the beginning. I said, if I could get you here, what hipper person for this little hipper place? Come on. What? I'm your biggest. Really? Why? Why would you think I wouldn't want you? I mean, I would never want anyone here, first of all, in my house. That's true. Who I didn't adore. Oh my God, I'm so happy to hear that.
Well, why did you come? I feel like I'm just a big disappointment. What, disappointment? No, because I'm in awe of you. Oh. I adore you. See, that's why. But I don't assume it's a two-way street. Of course. I live in the real world. Oh, oh. No, this is my home. This is, I mean, I don't know. This is only for fun. Yeah. This whole thing. I mean, I did. Yeah. Are you liking it? Oh my God.
I mean, look, I'm not going to lie. I spent quite a bit of money so that we could, you know, set this place. I mean, it's almost like a reality show combined with a podcast, but that's the way I wanted it so that we could have, you know, I mean, there's a lot of podcasts and I find them, some are great, but they're, you know, there's a big penis mic in your face. I haven't done that one.
Well, you know what I mean. There's a giant... I've done the one with the big flower in your face. What's that? My vagina. Oh. Yeah, I've seen those too. I went too far. I went too out of obvious. I wanted just to be like the way I really am, except there's no music. Of course, we can't while we're talking. But it just feels like there is something missing and everything else feels right.
It's just us. There's nobody else in the room. There's liquor and these clove cigarettes. I don't know what they're putting in these things, but let me tell you. It's too bad you're not allowed to know. No. That's the surprise. Well, cloves. I know you're a history buff. Do you know anything about the history of cloves? No. Well, make it up. Me? Make it up? Yeah. Oh, okay.
Well, tobacco was for export, so they couldn't afford to let regular folks smoke it. Isn't that interesting? But that sounded possible, right? So incredibly real. Like, if I had not set it up, like, make it up, I would have just gone with it. I could make up anything. Yeah. Many of us could, you know.
When the kids feel bad about not knowing shit, I always try to comfort them by saying, you know, we all don't know, like, I mean, when you think of the infinite amount of things that you could possibly know in this world. Even the smartest person does not even know 0.1%. Right. Yeah. We're almost fully ignorant of everything, what we, you know, obviously, some people more than others.
No, and then the things you learn, you don't remember. So that's too bad. That's true, too. That part's really too bad. I think that has something to do with the clothes. I don't know. I can't make a direct correlation, but... Well, you know, now we'll know they're doing studies with clothes and cognition. Can I make you a drink? No, I have water. That's all you want? Yeah.
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Chapter 6: What does Lisa Kudrow think about the insanity required for great acting?
I know it's 5 o'clock, so it's okay. It's 5 o'clock somewhere. Oh, wait, here. Are you abstemious? Yeah, I don't drink a lot. I mean, you said abstemious, so I thought, okay. Oh, abstemious. Abstaining? I think I mispronounced it. Abstaneous, you said? Abstemious. Doesn't that mean you, yeah, you're... Are you? No. With drinking, the only time I drink really is here. Oh, really? Yes.
I used to drink, you know, like an Irishman. I was never a drunk, although I certainly have been drunk many times, but... I drank Irishly, you know, which is not good for your liver, I'm sure. And, you know, I don't want to look like Ted Kennedy. You know, so I, you know, especially now that he's dead, but even before, you know, that kind of like... No, it takes a toll.
Especially if you're Irish. Really? Well, sure, because you're lighter. Yeah. You know, it's like the opposite of black, don't crack. No, but European... Cracks the most. European... All Europeans are pretty white. But more so the... The Irish. Well, like the beautiful people of the Nordic countries somehow are even further north, but they have that beautiful olive skin usually. They do? Yes.
Olive? Yes. Wait, why doesn't that sound even a little bit right to me? You mean the, like, blond Scandinavian people? Yes, Scandinavian, of course. They don't look like the Gaelic people, my people. They're not ruddy. Wait a minute. What's ruddy? What is ruddy? What's ruddy? Ruddy is red. Yeah. That's what I thought. Well, that's... Think of somebody like, you know... Ted Kennedy. Yeah. Right.
I'll throw a name out. Ted Kennedy. But not Jack Kennedy. He looked more... Well, he had makeup. Always? He was just a good-looking guy. Yeah. It's funny how in families sometimes there's just, you know, siblings and one of them is the good-looking one. Yeah. You know, Bobby... Well, he was good looking. Not like Jack. He was a little... Was he that good looking, though?
He was just, he was sexier because he was grittier. I guess. Not my type. I think that's not your type. No. A Jack Kennedy? No.
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Chapter 7: How do Bill and Lisa discuss the evolution of sitcoms?
But a Bobby Kennedy. Was a little cuter to me. Physically cuter? Yeah. See, most people would say not that. They would say the reverse. Right. And I even think that you're... you know, as a woman who are deeper and feel things on a deeper level, well, it's true, especially in this subject. It's like the physical part is not as important to you.
I think something about Bobby Kennedy is getting to you in your deep woman way. Maybe. But here, I misled. I was just comparing. But none of the Kennedys are my type. None of the Kennedys? No, no. Because of their look or because of their actions? Their teeth. Teeth? No. Yeah. What? Yeah. What's wrong with their teeth? I don't know. That's the British who have the bad teeth.
No, it's not that they had bad teeth, but I didn't like their teeth. I just didn't like it. I don't... Uh-uh. No. Mm-mm. They all looked like... And did this inflect... I mean, infect your view of their politics? No. No. Well, I was... Well, I was... You would not vote for someone who gets their teeth, Lisa Kudrow, would you? Well, I don't like Bill Clinton's teeth. No, but I...
No, but I was born when John Kennedy was killed. 63? Yeah. I was seven, yeah. And I was five when Bobby Kennedy was killed. So, no, no. I mean, I didn't have politics about them. But my parents were huge fans. So were mine. Yeah. But that's because my father, again, Irish, Catholic, and, you know, I mean... And my father, my grandfather, had a full brogue. Really? Yes. I never met.
Oh, he was from? No, but he was, I guess, second generation. Raised with everybody, yeah. But this is, I mean, a man I never met. But it's funny, if I had done your show instead of Skip Gates' show, we would have heard it. You did? Did I not see it? Did I watch all of the shows? I guess I don't remember them. When did you do it? I would say four years ago. Oh, shoot. Something like that.
I'll re-watch it. That sounds like I'll re-watch it. I mean, but your show was fantastic. I mean, it's a great idea for a show. And the way you make it into it. I wish it were my idea. As a history major, I appreciate that. Oh, you're a history major. I was in college. Yeah. You know. That's a lot more history than history. Oh, yeah. Anyone learns in high school, right?
I love history, and I love when you weave it in. Yeah. No, because that's why I loved this show, because it's history, but it's the personal stories that drive it home. It's the actual effects of history. Like, why can't they teach it? But when I did his show, My Genealogy for Skip, I mean, the star of it was my grandfather, who, again, I never met. But he was a baller. He was a macho guy.
He ran the Boatsman's Union. Oh, yeah. in New Jersey and New York, you know, the circle day line of the stuff that went around. And this is in the days when the Irish ran New York. Right. Every cop, every fireman, you know, Officer Mike, yeah. And this isn't part of the Teamsters because that's... No, no, that's truck. It's nautical. Yes, it's nautical. Okay.
And it was also what happened, I guess, on the ports because... He had a headline from 1920, and it was my grandfather called a strike and was brought up to the White House because it had to be settled because this was the port of New York.
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Chapter 8: What insights do they share about the pressures of show business?
Oh, yeah. But he was a union captain who got in the days when, I mean, what unions had to fight for back then was like, you know. Yeah. We would like a 14-hour workday. We're not kidding. And you could only whip them if that, you know, it was just crazy what he had to fight for. And you don't get to choose who we marry. Yeah. Yeah, crazy shit. Yeah. So that was my grandfather. Wow.
William Marr also. I would have been William Marr III if I had been confirmed in the Catholic Church because I would have been William Aloysius Marr. That was my grandfather's name and my father's name, and I was supposed to be William Aloysius Maher. But you get your middle name at your confirmation, the Catholics. And I never made it that far. I didn't know that. Yeah.
But you're still, that's not your given name? Like the birth certificate doesn't say? I have no middle name. Oh, you don't have? Because you're supposed to get it at 13. Oh, you have to wait. You're supposed to get it at 13 when you're confirmed. That's a big thing in the Catholic Church. At seven, you have your first communion. That traumatized me like I can't even tell you.
And then 13, you're confirmed. I don't know. It's sort of like the bar mitzvah. Why did it traumatize you? What? You know, nuns, fucking sadists. Oh, they were? Well, of course. Well, some of them are nice, I assume. On trouble with angels, they were really nice. But, I mean. Well, nuns are married to Christ, and apparently he's not putting out. Okay. Because they have a kind of a...
Anger issues that you only get when you've never been late. I don't know what it was and I was seven years old. All I know is one of them one day, for example, this one sticks in my mind, said, we're in the church and they're doing their shit up there and I guess I was like, you know. And she said, the boy who's slumping is going to go to hell. Oh, wow. They did shit like that. Wait a minute.
Okay, but I thought your mom is Jewish. Right. That I never even knew until I was 13 because I was so traumatized by going to church. I didn't even think, why doesn't mom come? I don't know. She just never does. It never crossed my mind to ask. I just wanted to get out of it. But I thought it was tricky for a Catholic to marry a Jew. It was. So how did that all happen?
Especially in 1951 when they did it. It was like an interracial marriage, not even today, like 20 years ago. Yeah. Well, it was in the 60s, too. And even into the 70s, it was sort of starting to get like, wow. Did you watch Mad Men? Yeah. Remember the first season or second, there was a plot line of he goes out with the girl from the Jewish department store. Yeah, yeah.
I mean, they had their own, Jews had their own department store? Or owned a very successful department store. Right, but I mean, I think Gimbels, the real Gimbels was that. Yeah. I think in a day when, what, what, what? Oh, so the Jews would have a place to shop? Yes, well, just the idea that this was the early 60s and Gentiles and Jews shopped separately in department stores?
Oh, I wasn't aware of that. Wait, I wasn't aware of that. I wasn't aware of that. Are you sure, history major? I'm not sure that a Jew couldn't walk into Macy's. He did. I guess so. And Bloomedale. Yes. But it seemed to me like he was, of course, cheating on his wife, as he always was. Right. But also he was sort of like crossing into a different world is the way they sort of presented it. Right.
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