When Holidays Hurt: Gentle Rituals and Safe Havens for Grief and Joy to Coexist

In this tender, timely episode, Kathi Lipp welcomes her friend Tenneil Register to help listeners who feel the pressure to be merry when life hurts. If you’re carrying loss, change, or exhaustion into the holidays, this conversation offers slow, practical steps to honor your grief—and still make room for moments of joy. Listeners will learn how to: Identify your core need this season (quiet, simplicity, or supportive people) and adjust traditions accordinglyCreate a “safe haven” at home or a mobile breathing space to check in with your heartSet loving boundaries and reset expectations with family when energy is lowUse a simple permission slip to skip activities without guiltTry gentle remembrance practices (a candle at dinner, an empty chair, a ribbon or ornament) that bring meaning without overwhelmUse grounding techniques for overstimulation (engage one sense at a time, savor small joys)Build a nourishing rhythm of rest, connection with safe people, and small acts of creationReflect and release—recognizing what’s hard while noticing new strength and hope They also share a resource to walk beside you: Tenneil’s "When Joy Takes Courage: A Guide to Healing Through the Holiday Season" —a 12-day, retreat-style guide to help you move gently through the season. If your holidays need to be smaller, slower, and softer this year, you’re not failing—you’re being faithful to the season you’re in. This episode will help you breathe again.

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