Complex PTSD Recovery [Reports]: We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers
Episodes
5.11 Cognitive Basis of Depression
26 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
'Stop seeing everything so negatively." they say. But the cognitive behaviors underlying depression don't allow it. Let's talk about mental reactions ...
5.10 Back to High School: Secret Sources of Peer Pressure in the 2020s
30 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
"Peer Pressure is a high school problem." Or is it? Let's talk about adult brains drunk on social influence through the illusions and purposeful manip...
5.9 Costs of Impression Management
30 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If Facades of Conformity feel a bit much, how about Impression Management strategies? Let's talk about common strategies, the risks vs. rewards, and n...
5.8 Facades of Conformity (FOCs)
27 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's a summary episode! What have we been talking about lately? Facades of Conformity as they overlap with CPTSD, RSD, and life-destruction.Free Video...
5.7 Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) x CPTSD Life Experiences
26 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The RSD - "typical CPTSD experience" overlap is deep and wide. Let's talk about shutting down life, expression, and healing from heightened rejection ...
5.6 Pub Ep! Environ-Mental Illness: Fear vs. Anxiety, Stress, Phobia, Paranoia
28 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Video!let's talk about environ mental illness, discussing how external stimuli and personal experiences contribute to psycho-emotional disruptions. To...
5.5 Behaviors for Preventing PTSD
31 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We can't prevent trauma, but we can help ourselves prevent long-term disordering in the aftermath. Here's the ultra brief rundown of behaviors to prev...
5.4 Practical Ways to Regulate Your Nervous System
30 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
FREE VIDEO!Coming off a natural disaster trauma, let's talk about 47 *practical* ways to rebalance your nervous system.... that aren't all "yoga and b...
5.3 Boundaries to allow compassionate, love, and self-existence
31 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
VIDEO (FREEEEEE)Compassion requires protection in the form of relationship-allowing boundaries. read: not relationship-ending rules. What are boundari...
CHILL SOUNDS for/from an unchill week
15 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
So my CNS has been plugged to a 50amp this week, hburs?Gratefully heard some sounds under the near-full moon that swept a bitta anxiety awayHave an im...
5.2 Trauma Perspectives & Egos
27 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
A VIDEOMemories detached from the whole -> views too big or too small which lock the brain into patterned behaviors and outcomes. Talking perspecti...
5.1 STRESS | Societal Trauma x CPTSD Management Begins
29 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Free VideoIt's time! To support ourselves by applying everything we've learned in 5 years of research together. Today: stress utilization.On the marke...
4.12 Your Haunted Self: DISASSOCIATION
31 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A FULL LENGTH SHARE! Let's talk about the directions of disassociation and what to do about the pattern of continually ditching this bitch.VIDEO HEREH...
4.11 Exploring Yer Haunted self pt 1: STRESS, BIG EMOS, MISALIGNMENTS, EMBARRASHAMING MEMORIES
01 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
What waits inside your self? STRESS, BIG EMOTIONS, MISALIGNMENTS, AND HUMILIATING MEMORIES, anyone? Let's summarize these stops on our spooktacular se...
BONUS Entering Yer HAUNTED self đź‘» Choose your own spookventure begins!
31 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We're doing something extra đź’€ It's a halloween, election, and holiday season special! đź’€ Today we begin exploring our abandoned selves and exorci...
4.10 Reconnecting with your haunted self
31 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Being with you... isn't an innate skill after trauma. And yet, we must, or we'll never recover. Take this long treat of an episode to start practicing...
4.9 Obstacles to Actual self-Love After Trauma
28 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The filthiest words: love yourself. 🤮 Why does trauma create barriers between us and... not hating us? Talkin' lost relationships, criteria for lov...
4.8 Self Compassion; the Daily Battle for Recovery
28 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Education and Responsibility are important for t-recovery... But progress peters when self-punishment predominates. Without self-compassion, regressio...
4.7 Major Image-Distorting self-Defenses [Splitting and Projective Identification]
29 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
When life serves conflictual and confusing information, our brains simplify it to survive... and fuck us over in the long-run. Let's talk about the "A...
4.6. Acting out, Help-rejecting complaining, and Passive Aggression; The (most) Immature Defenses
27 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Ready to learn about the maladaptive tendencies of your most difficult relational partners? When we don't believe we're "entitled" to a need or emotio...
4.5 Narcs, Defense Mechanisms, & (non)Recovery: Intellectualizing, Rationalizing, and Reactionary Decision Making
28 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We've learned that narcs don't generally recover because of their "creative narration" abilities. Now, let's talk about some of the ways they spin tho...
4.4. Pathological Structuring of Narcissists (Or, No Integrity without Integration)
24 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
They'll shake your hand while pissing on your leg, plead and then pulverize promises, and generally give the sense that they're one hundred people who...
4.3. Healing with "Adaptive Narcissism" and Uniqueness | Leveraging Stigma for Permissive self-Healing
01 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
"Just feel good about your authentic self and don't let anyone wreck your recognition of specialness." Right. Let's talk about what may be holding us ...
4.2. Filial Obligation Narratives, Ambivalence, Perception, and Guilt
22 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Why is the decision to sacrifice or save our brains so difficult to make? Let's talk about subconscious narratives we probably all carry, the ambi...
4.1. Making of a Vulnerable Narcissist
30 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A big 'nouncement; so long TMFRS! Then let's talk about what constitutes a VulNarc versus "a person with CPTSD." Where does the chro...
3.12b. Sex on Parts and Survival Programs
15 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
This year we spoke about Intimacy. Now it's time to confront *Intimacy.* Let's look at the discrepant programs that live inside of us, gathere...
3.12a. Transference, Projection, Monkey-barring, Displacement
11 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We're tying up loose ends in our discussion of relationships! Today, discussing the cognitive copy-pastes we accidentally carry out between past a...
Self-abandonment vs your best Spanksgiving
22 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Let's cut the brainy shit, the real answer to surviving the holidays is not abandoning yourself.Need more holiday support? Don't we all. For all the o...
3.11. Ten Destructive Responses that Set Off Trauma Defenses
03 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Back to NonViolent Communication! Here are 10 things the experts say destroy our attempts at vulnerable disclosures and requests. Just in time for the...
3.10. Chronic deprivation, self-sabotage, psychosomatic illness, and abuse dynamics
20 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We learn to neglect ourselves at an early age and then everything goes to hell forever after. Stuck in unfixable suffering, toiling away with ineffect...
3.9b Ending Deprivation and Rehabbing yer Brain with NonViolent Communication
29 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
"Depression is the reward we get for being good children."NVC helps yer relationships, sure. But it'll also rewire your t-brain trashhab...
3.9a NonViolent (Effective) Communication
15 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Ever feel "unheard"? Well, here's the key to getting your point across and sparking collaboration rather than opposition.Today, we'r...
3.8b. Shitpologies (AKA non-apology apologies)
01 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
So, how do we apologize "the right way"... Rather than creating MORE damage through half-assed "I'm sorrys"?Today, let's t...
3.8a. The Key to Healing Relational Ruptures (and two people)
16 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
How DO we heal what's been broken? I've got a short phrase for you - it's what we've all needed to hear all along. And let's talk ...
Extra "survival Fs" to give in relationship; Fronting and Feigning
27 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We all know about the 4 survival Fs at this point. But how about the additional F reactions- Fronting and Feigning?Let's talk about learned reactions ...
3.7. Determining "Are they a good relational partner?" before committing
15 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We've talked a lot about committing fully to relationships and overcoming our conflicts together, through examining the subconscious wounds that a...
3.6b Overcoming spiraling conflicts in trauma-impacted relationships
16 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Ever feel like "the issue" isn't really "the issue" in relational conflict? That's because the real issue is buried under ...
3.6a. Lost love and authentic connection; the fragmented brain explanation
05 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Why do we start close relationships and love connections feeling one way... only to watch them disintegrate, become survival-based, and turn into &quo...
3.5 Shadow parts vs. successful relationships | Internal VIT for healthy connections
05 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We MFs struggle to begin or maintain healthy relationship dynamics, with a lot of externalized finger pointing about why. "Abusers just flock to ...
Special release | "Ah Hell Naw" Learned obstacles to forming close relationships
21 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Why don't we sign up for close connections anymore? Especially after learning about our CPTSD patterns? It's an episode pulled from the privat...
3.4 Vulnerability, Intimacy, and Trust Issues in Relationship
07 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
"So how do you feel about relationships? Complicated? You want them? You despise them? You fear them? You long for them? You try them? You exit...
3.3. Subconscious Self-loathing
10 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
So you're doing your damndest to be "your best self." Maybe you're confident and comfortable in your identity these days. But, at the same time, you s...
Hardening versus Healing
24 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Today, sharing a mini essay I wrote for another platform, where controversial perspectives are the topic of conversation.In so much of this "trauma re...
3.2. Healing self-contradicting brains with Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy
10 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Ever feel like you've got a whole household of people contained in one skull? Fighting, just like they did in your family home? Turns out, that's norm...
3.1. Loneliness and Isolation in CPTSD
25 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Surprise, we're back! Keeping up with the private stream's topic of the month, we're here to talk about Loneliness. Let's discuss the varieties of lo...
2.12. Challenges of breaking the cycle | AKA - generational upset, NC, a new world
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Let's talk about the opposition we face during trauma recovery - namely, from our social contacts who aren't ready to have their own histories and per...
2.11. Forming new lives | AKA - reintegration efforts for lasting change
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
So we do this painful and energetically expensive inner work. And then what? Return to the same old lives? Naw, Fucker. That's the fastest way to hit ...
2.10. The resources needed for brain recovery | AKA - mediums for new perspectives
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Aiming for recovery, but finding that you never have the conditions to make progress?Let's talk about what it takes for a brain to heal. The basic med...
2.9. Loss of functionality | AKA - overcompensation, collapse, resisilence not resistence
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
A brain is busy with all those survival processes running in the background and the second-by-second management of triggers and symptoms. So what happ...
2.8. Internal battles | AKA - healing your disintegrated brain
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Back to this self-limiting conversation... what happens when our "selves" are limited by incohesion? When we have inner wars over "the right thin...
2.7. Self-limiting modes of existence | AKA - life halting programs and parts battles
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
You've decided to enact new behaviors to change your life... only to find you can't actually put them into practice. You stall out and revert to ...
2.6. Default Mode Network (DMN) | AKA - memory throwbacks, bodily disconnection, and sub-sensory fear
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
So we all have a penchant for fear, it's a foundational aspect of PTSD. But what happens when our brain relay system is wonky due to those adaptations...
2.5. Entrapment, defeat, suicidality, and relationships | AKA - it's not worth your whole life
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We know, trauma brains create patterns that can stall us out and keep us stuck. This is especially true when talking "relationships" of all forms...
2.4. Filial obligation and family re-immersion | AKA - the family system trap
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
The time comes for all of us; the family call to duty. And then what. We know it's going to trigger unwanted trauma reactions. But resisting often fee...
2.3. “Perspective” | AKA - gaslighting, cognitive self-corruption, time distortions
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Perspective; A word with many meanings, depending on who's speaking it. Namely, the bane of, "that's just ONE perspective."Let's talk about the real d...
2.2. Retraumatization, backslides, and non-linear progress | AKA - current cult.ural triggerings
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Have you been struggling to make meaningful progress? Well, these global events don't help. Especially when they feel so... family-iar... to...
2.1. “Not bad enough to be trauma” | AKA - the aftermath is what matters
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Ever doubt that "it was significant enough to count as t-word"? Well, the key word is significance. Let's break this down simply and talk ab...
Intro to Season Two
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We're back! Let's wrap up a year of in-depth trauma research and community insights with a new season. Free holiday support Discord server: http...
1.13. Recovery
21 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Convinced you aren't individually damaged, doomed, or destitute yet? Sick. But that comfort doesn't do much good if your brain, behaviors, and life do...
1.12. Loss of "Self," Learned Helplessness, and Executive Functioning
13 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Do you edit your daily activities to feel "acceptable," to the detriment of your own wants, needs, and goals? Can you see yourself clearly from the ou...
1.11. Fawning, Anxious Attachment, and Enmeshment
06 Jan 2022
Contributed by Lukas
What's the difference between "being a good person" and sacrificing your whole life to support others? In most of our families and social structures.....
1.10. Family of Origin & Yer Brain Programming
31 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Here's a holiday release for ya. Merry whatever-you-do, and let's talk about families fuckin things up. Mental illness seems to run in fami...
1.9. The Trauma Trap: Avoidance, Rigidity, and Trauma-Bubbles
23 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
So, let's say your brain is on fire 24/7. Your body is doing the same. You're uncomfortable every moment, from the inside and out. You, very literally...
1.8. Losing Control of Your Brain: Triggers, Spirals, Addiction, Self-harm, Bad habits
16 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
What's the difference between your past high-functionality and current fears of "losing your fucking mind"? Bad information that was programmed i...
1.7. Anxiety, Obsession, and ADHD; The High Energy Hellscape
08 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Time to talk about perhaps the largest post-traumatic complaint. It's time for Anxiety. (When isn't it?) Let's also chat about those highly related co...
1.6. Depression, Shame, Rumination; The Low Energy Gang
06 Dec 2021
Contributed by Lukas
You know the team well. They all travel together. One feeds into and strengthens the next. And getting away from them feels inescapable. It's a T...
1.5. Life-Numbing Dissociation
24 Nov 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Emotional numbing. Over-intellectualizing. Depersonalization. Derealization. Fragmented Personalities. Let's talk about all the ways that our brains t...
1.4. Actually-Effective Therapy
17 Nov 2021
Contributed by Lukas
I know, therapy probably hasn’t been a walk in the park so far. If you’re here, you’re probably looking for more information, more help, or more...
1.3b. Yer Life on CPTSD
10 Nov 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Let's take an unexpected step back, and talk more about the EXPERIENCE of living with CPTSD, not just the brain processes that make it reality. With m...
1.3a. Yer Brain on CPTSD
01 Nov 2021
Contributed by Lukas
Let's talk about everyone's favorite new buzzdiagnosis - Complex Trauma (CPTSD). What is it? Why is it so difficult to name? And what does it really d...
1.2. What is Trauma? Brain Mechanism of PTSD
24 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
It's not so mysterious, actually. We’ve really made Trauma into a big word with a lot of negative connotation, qualification, and over-complica...
1.1. Intro
24 Oct 2021
Contributed by Lukas
So, how’s life been lately? But how has it really been? Having some variety of experiences that goes beyond your normal baseline standard depression...