After a series of recording misfortunes, this title spoke to Hunter. In Peter Frost David's tale, time is moving too slow to bear. After a man participates in an experimental drug trial, he is forced to reach out to have the public put him out of his misery. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What happened during the recording session?
Isaiah, you're doing the intro today. You're doing the welcome back. There's no Will left after what we've been through this morning. Which, mind you, it's now been an hour. A little over an hour.
Chapter 2: What story are they discussing?
Welcome back to Creepcast. There, did I do it right enough? That's fine. Today, we are going to be reading a story called If You're Armed and at the Glenmont Metro, Please Shoot Me.
Indicative of how I feel today for these recordings. Do you want to tell the audience what happened? I have no will. You're going to have to spill the beans, and I just need to emotionally chime in when I can.
So we went to... We've went to five different stories. We've recorded two of them. We started to record dialogue for two of them. We started to record the first one, which is one you guys have recommended. We read forever and Hunter hated it. He, I have the recording that may eventually see the light of day. He immediately began to crash out.
Chapter 3: Why does Hunter feel frustrated with the stories?
He got so upset and he's like, we have to change stores. We have to go something else. So we find another story he likes and we start reading it. But then the author of the story has posted like in giant letters across their Reddit, like I will take you down if you read this story. Or like if you read this story without first getting permission.
So we had to ask for permission and now we're waiting to hear back on that. And then we looked at all these other stories and they all had like individual problems. It's been over an hour.
I've said this story. Twice now. Or three or four. An infinite amount of times. Yeah. We are in the end of the year of doing this show. We have... Some obligations we have to do as well, and also just want to make sure that you guys feel like you got enough content for the month as well. But I leave the country this week, going to be gone on vacation, going to Japan. My soul is there already.
It's kind of like whenever you know something's coming up, you're kind of just checked out. That's how it feels. Now, here's the thing about the story we read earlier, and I don't want to say the name because I don't want to... I don't want to crash out again. I don't want to freak out, but we could revisit it in the future.
Maybe I'll, you know, better mindset or whatever, but it has been, you know, we are, I am here to make sure that we deliver a nice show, but my God, is it pulling teeth? So I'm here to be a good little boy during this recording, no matter what, to make sure that this gets fucking done. And that we can end this year on a nice upbeat note.
And I will say that if you're armed at the Glenmont Metro, please shoot me. It's a great title. And I think we, I think I'm pretty sure that we're going to do something similar. He did for the Whistler, which is because this is a short story. This isn't, it's pretty short. So I think we're going to try to read a couple by this author.
Either a couple from this guy, but it also seems like there is, if we like this, there are two following like addendum parts to this story. So we could just read those two.
Yeah, so we could just pick and choose how we go about this.
So the story is written by Reddit user Sarcasinomicon. Sarcasinomicon, I believe is how it's said. His name is Peter Frost David. And he has an interesting website called A New Kind of Monster. And across the entire website, it's like him theorizing the best monsters that could be created for stories. He has a store.
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Chapter 4: Who is the author of the story being read?
Let's see if we can't turn the tides on today and get this recording going.
All right, so let's go. We'd like to take a minute to thank today's sponsor, Rocket Money. I guarantee that you would be surprised by how much money you're spending on unneeded subscriptions. And with Christmas around the corner, it's time to be spreading holiday cheer instead of your wallet. Well, today's sponsor, Rocket Money, is here to help.
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All of this gets me one step closer of my eventual goal of buying Hunter for all he's worth and finally escaping this purgatory of a podcast. So take control of your finances today and head to rocketmoney.com slash creepcast or click the link in the description to get started for free. That is right for free at rocketmoney.com slash creepcast to get in on this incredible offer today.
Thank you so much to Rocket Money for sponsoring the show. It means the most. And now, a word from Hunter. If you're armed and at the Glenmont Metro, please shoot me. Make it a headshot. Shoot me in the temple. I mean slightly downwards. I need the bullet to travel the shortest possible distance from my brain before it hits my hippocampus.
If I'm lucky, the sensation of the gunshot ripping through my skull will only last a few decades. This sounds like you right now.
Already. That's what the perpetual hell I'm in already is that sitting down to open up reddit slash r slash no sleep feels like a thousand years is what it feels like. So good on you. I do want to say that's a sick way to end it. It will only last a few decades. It's kind of fucked, right?
Yeah. Look at that. Look how quick this one hooked you.
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Chapter 5: What are the themes of the discussed story?
We'll see that. You know what? I'm trying to be a positive little, little, little bear.
All right. I'm proud. I'm proud of you. Little bear. As awful as this sounds, you'll be doing me an enormous favor. Death by a headshot as soon as possible is vastly better than the alternative. My ordeal started over 10,000 years ago at 10 15 this morning. Okay. That's pretty cool. That goes, that goes kind of hard, right? Was he a caveman? No, he's saying 10,000 years ago at 1015 this morning.
As in 1015 this morning was 10,000 years ago.
Oh, I see. Okay.
I earn extra money by participating in drug trials. I'm a so-called healthy subject who takes experimental drugs to help assess side effects. Once it was a kidney drug. A few times it's been something for blood pressure, cholesterol. This morning, they told me the drug I took was a psychoactive substance intended to accelerate brain function.
Oh, that's kind of fun. Like drug, not to get too sidetracked, but like drug testing, like pharmaceutical drug testing. I would never do it. I don't care how much of a pinch I am. I would be too afraid. There's too much crazy shit that they make too. You know what I mean?
I mean, logistically, yes. But some people, yes, some people need the money, but even then some people don't know like the level of like how much drugs can mess you up. Right.
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Chapter 6: What challenges do they face with the podcast?
Well, yeah.
Maybe I'll feel bad for a little bit and that's it.
Chapter 7: What is Rocket Money and how does it help?
Yeah. I'm like, I will just assume that everything's fine. I don't know. There's nothing where they're just like, well, it's just, you know, this is just a vitamin. I wouldn't trust it with any fiber of my being. Absolutely not. Yeah. Also, here's another thing. I would gladly shoot somebody in the head if they were saying yes.
I knew you were going to go somewhere with that in a second.
If someone asked me to shoot them in the head? Yeah, if somebody was just like, hey, by the way, meet me at the mall tomorrow. Let's set it up. Let's meet me at the mall tomorrow. I want you to just go there. Everyone else knows you're not going to get arrested. That's just the most convenient place for me to be.
I want you to put it in the back of my tent pole, point it down slightly, and shoot it into my brain. I think I should be doing me a big favor. Thanks, buddy. If you want to get arrested, clean conscious, would you do it?
I don't think that makes it legal. I think you're still wanted for murder. Let's just say in this world it is. No, I would not kill someone because they wanted me to. All right. It would have to be like a mercy kill. I would do that if, say... I don't know. We were in an apocalyptic scenario and someone's ripped in half. They're not going to make it.
If I was on my farm and I was underneath a tractor... Would you kill me?
No, absolutely. What do you mean? If you were on your farm, you're underneath a tractor, I'm calling an ambulance.
There's no time, Isaiah.
Grab the gun out of my tractor. That's not how that works. It is 2024. There's hospitals you can go to. I'm not going to make it. I think it's funny in my head because like your legs ran over like the rest of you is fine.
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Chapter 8: What are their thoughts on extreme situations?
Okay, let's change this. Let's say this is in a no, like an infrastructure breakdown, right? Like I can't call an ambulance, right? Sure. Because that would be the decision maker. Because if there is a micro percentage of a chance you could live, I would not kill you.
Even if I was like, Isaiah, I have no point to live. I will resent you for the rest of my life.
No, just because a friend wants to die doesn't mean I grant them that. I would do you that favor. No, no, no. Look at this. What if like, this is a couple of years from now. Okay. What if, what if you, what if you had a child right during this scenario? And then like you, you abandoned the child. Like, no, I'm not letting you do that.
Just cause you want to go in the second bed of the child with no cock balls or asshole. What kind of father figure could I be? I can't teach my boy's father figure a teacher. No, no. No, I don't think so. I would. Your son is going to appreciate that. I didn't shoot you in the field. I would think that he doesn't even have to know. This could be our secret.
He doesn't have to know that dad has a bullet in his forehead. Okay. Look, listen, back to what I was saying. I can't patch you up. If you're, if you're ripped up from like, you know, rip cage down. And I doubt we would have the resources to do that if there was no ambulance police. So if this was like an apocalyptic scenario and you were ripped in half, I would shoot you. Is that what you want?
That's a good enough for me. Okay. If I can call the police, I'm not doing it.
Okay, well, first off, if it's an apocalyptic scenario, then there probably is no police. I'm saying that if... That's what I'm saying. If they... If... I think that under the right circumstances and under the right pressure, I think I could get you to do it. That's where I'll end it. I don't think it'd be easy.
I don't think that... Like I said, if I had no means of getting you to a hospital or an ambulance or something like that, then I would do it, yes. I would sit there and I'd just be looking at you like this.
I'd put my hands up and I'd be like, Isaiah, don't do it. Don't do it, Isaiah.
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