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Chapter 1: What humorous introductions set the tone for the episode?
Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers, and welcome to Distractible. From hyping hairlessness to expunging Wade... Yes, it's time for Doing Too Much. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome back to another episode of Distractible, the most hype, the most handsome, the most hairless podcast you're gonna find anywhere online.
I was trying to... I could be handsome, or I could be hype. Wait, do I have to be hairless? Pretty much, yeah. I guarantee I have more hair than you on every part of my body that has hair. Plus, I have hair where you don't. The esophagus? I guess if we're counting body hair, I am quite a hairless individual. Markiplier up top, mole rat below. Why did I introduce this podcast that way?
Couldn't fucking tell you. Anyway, Wade Spauld, welcome to Distractible. This is the show where the points are like apples to your doctor. They matter as much as you think they do. But your doctor doesn't really give a shit if you eat apples. You still have to go see him. I tried that. I told my doctor I was eating like three apples a day. Still made me come in. Didn't matter.
Said I needed Edison. Anyway, if you've never seen the show before, this is a great warm-up for what you can expect for the entire time. It's an improvised show. I have a topic. We might not even get to it. It really depends how things go today.
Chapter 2: What unexpected health issues did the hosts face recently?
We poured our hearts out last time, so I'm sure we'll get to the game today. I'm sure it'll be fine. But I'm the host, Bob, because I won the last one. And I only am Bob because I won. If I had lost, I'd be somebody else. I'm joined, as always, by my two competitors slash co-hosts, Mark and Wade. Hello. Hey, hey, hey. It feels like it's been like a month and a half to me.
The amount of shit that happened since the last time we were here doing this, which was only one week ago, is crazy to me.
Chapter 3: How did travel visa issues affect the hosts' plans?
Do you guys know that five hours after we hung up the last recording session, I was doubled over a toilet vomiting so hard that I was pulling muscles on my ribs? No, I thought you were on a plane. I kind of suspected that. Actually, yeah, Mark did know that. No, I didn't go. Didn't end up going to England. Was supposed to go to England. Didn't happen. Crazy.
Wait, neither one of you made it to England? Nobody made it to England. No one made it.
Is anyone in England? England, are you there? It wasn't just us. Nobody could go to England because their whole government system to get travel visas exploded. I don't know. I don't know what happened. It just stopped existing for a while. But you were sick, which is different than the problem I was having.
Chapter 4: What exciting new products did the hosts receive?
I haven't been that sick in such a long time. Last time I was like, oh, James was sick. It was so bad. I don't even care if he was sick anymore. God, I was sick. It's awful. Me. If you don't laugh, it's really awkward, guys. Sam, take a laugh from another episode. Put it here. I just have spent a hell of a week. How are you guys doing? Well, to echo on that, I also was supposed to be in love.
I've got a lot of small talk to talk about. It was also one of the most eventful weeks of my entire existence. I think all three of us could probably agree this past week has been loaded with all kinds of incredible, horrifying things happening.
Mine was pretty on par with normal. I don't know if we all three could agree, but it sounds like you two really.
I know one thing that happened to all three of us that we can all be excited about. We all bought it. Wait, what? Wait, is that the ILM one? No, it's a 3D printed...
no wait no and you i know you bought they sent this to me with a handwritten note that said hey distractible thanks so much for being so hyped up about gopro and our new products and we thought we'd send you guys they sent us one camera and by us they met you i assumed they sent it to each of us like we i am not distractible the it was we are the three of us are distracted anymore apparently you are mr distractible
Cause I knew Mark had bought one. So I thought like, oh, well, he's not going to be, you know, he's not gonna be like hyped as I am about that. But yeah, they sent the, and they sent the, the, the cage that goes with it. That's pretty nothing. You got, nevermind. I mean, nothing happened to all three of us this week.
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Chapter 5: How do the hosts feel about their experiences at events?
We all had very different experiences. Did they actually, did they actually, Yes. Honest to God. A package showed up, and it was addressed to Distractable, and I was like, huh, that's weird, because we haven't had any sponsors lately. Previously, when we had lots of sponsors on the show, we would occasionally just get boxes that were like, here's your supply of gummies for some reason.
You're going to do a sponsorship. But this, it was a very nice note that was like, ah, you guys are such good fans. We love you, Distractable. Here's that camera you were talking about so much. Go shoot your movies with it. Do they think they're funny? Do they think they're funny?
I think they're funny.
I was sad until I realized Mark didn't get one, too. Now I feel a lot better. I have one. I have actually multiple because I bought multiple of them.
If Wade didn't get one, I'm happier. I didn't get one, so you can be happier.
I didn't realize I was so important. I didn't realize I was the figurehead of this show. I represent all of distractible. Look, you know, you, Mark, I'm sure that they meant to send it to you. And there was just some mix up because they were like, oh, Mark's big Cincinnati guy. He must be one. It must be the Cincinnati address. And we all live in the same house. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I mean, it's house.
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Chapter 6: What are the humorous critiques of overly multifunctional products?
It's going to be an honest mistake, right? Because you talked to somebody, I thought. I have been. I have been.
You know, I have been. Well, they definitely don't have Mark's address from the purchase he actually made through them to get one. So, yeah, odds are a very easy mistake.
I'm not even completely clear how they got my address. I've never worked with GoPro ever directly. They work in tech. They have all of our addresses. They know us. I just asked ChatGPT, like, where does Bob live? Where does Distractable live? And your address came up. I bet yours is in the mail.
I mean, this came almost a week ago, but... I think that while I was sick the day after we recorded last, I think this showed up. So it's been here for a while. I've been using it for trains. James likes me to film his trains, you know, so that's pretty important.
Mark's like on the edge of a volcano like, man, I really hope I can film this with my new camera.
Bob's like, I have this little Fisher-Price train set. It's a Brio train. It's a Brio train with custom 3D printed accessories. Okay, just calm down. I'm just going to see if there's a distractible code that works on the site because that would be fucking funny.
Mark is going into chat GPT to change the distractible address.
Well, you've been using it, so I can tell you you were right on, Mark. It's a great camera. Probably the nicest camera I actually own. Well, it's old, but I do have a Sony a7R II. So that's probably, but that's not fair because this is like one tenth the size of that thing. I will say it's very good. Maybe not that good. Maybe it's not that good. Why did your voice crack during that? Are you okay?
I actually okay I was at Apple for the event and I felt afraid to pull this out of my pocket because you know them and their phones they're all like I was talking to the the this is a whole other I'm jumping into the middle of my I went to Apple small talk portion of this but I was talking to the Are we gonna get another MS Paint saga? No, it was the lead photo esthetician.
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Chapter 7: How do the hosts discuss the absurdities of everyday items?
Esthetician? Aesthetic person. The person who's in charge of defining the aesthetics of photos. And so I was talking to them about like, it was like, oh, yeah, what are you? It was a car in the movie. You know we use reds for my main YouTube. We got like an a7s3 And I have a Nikon Zr. And then I have a GoPro Then they're like how how do you how do you match all your stuff as well?
I go do when do you use your phone? I
But they all have to say, like, the iPhone 17 Pro Max.
I legitimately had a great time at the Apple trip, and I didn't mean to do it, but I was like, yeah, here's my phone. And I pulled this out, and then I pulled out this monstrosity next to it. I was like, and then I got this in my other pocket. I was like, what is that? I was like, oh, I 3D printed this little macro thing. It was made by... What kind of camera do you keep in your front pocket?
And I could just see, like, the color drain from her face. Oh, God. I'm just saying, hold on, wait. Hey, look, episodes of, an episode of this podcast was filmed on iPhones. iPhone. Mark's iPhone. Can I tell you why I was invited? Well, we now know why you won't be invited back, but yeah, sure. No, no, I was. I swear.
I have to shout out the subreddit Homelab because legitimately the reason I was invited is because Apple heard that I had 54 Mac studios in my bathroom as a runner for Mac. And they legitimately told me, yeah, no one's ever done that before. And so I got an invite. I got to talk. I shook hands. I shook hands with Tim Cook himself. Mr. Tim Apple.
I showed him the picture of my bathroom and he said, that makes my heart sing. And I legitimately was like, that is the most, I almost wept. I was just like, oh my God, it's so nice. Oh my God, I just put it in a bathroom. I met John Ternus. I shook hands with him.
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Chapter 8: What conclusions do the hosts draw about reliance on products?
I showed him the picture of it and he went, wow. Wow, cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool.
Mark's like, I went to Apple because I had a bunch of computers in my bathroom. Yeah, that is actually the reason.
Did you tell them about your Capri Sun hack? You know, it didn't come up. It didn't come up. Did you tell them they should make it an adapter so it's like a Capri Sun holder heat sink situation?
Mark pulls out his phone, he pulls out his GoPro, he pulls out a Capri Sun. He's like, guys, I have the next big thing for you.
I think that BTUs are an outdated way to measure thermal capacity. I think it should be Capri Suns, you know? I had a whole thing where I was gonna say, like, it was such a wonderful experience, which it was. I'm not saying I wasn't gonna say, oh, fuck.
Oh, God. I was gonna lie and say it was a great time.
It was such a wonderful experience. I, the entire architecture of the Apple I campus is mind-blowing. It looks fake. Like, it looks like a weird VR background when they do, because they do walk-in talks in front of it and stuff, and I'm always kind of like, is that really the thing, or is that, like, a weird rendered, because that looks ridiculous. It does. It looks insane. It's real.
It's legitimate. Every single inch of it has like this polish to it. And it's every like there's so much glass. I don't know how they made all the windows. I don't know how they did it. They have the largest moving glass doors in the world. And it takes seven minutes for them to open and they calculate it specifically of when they can maximize the temperature exchange.
And it's a marvel of engineering. That building is actually legitimately incredible. And I said to them, like, oh, I get it. Like, you want your employees to be inspired, but aren't you worried that they'll just kind of like wander in the park and never come back? Because the entire interior courtyard is like 80 acres of just like lovely landscaping with trees and gardens and fruit on art.
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