Unpacking Comp Het (a.k.a. Compulsory Heterosexuality): Desire, Obligation, and Identity

This week, we dive into the concept of compulsory heterosexuality—or “comp het”—and explore how it shapes our understanding of attraction, relationships, and identity. Coined by poet and theorist Adrienne Rich, comp het describes the ways society pressures people to perform heterosexuality regardless of their true desires. We break down where the term comes from, and how it continues to show up in culture today. From media portrayals, to family and community expectations, to those confusing moments when you’re not sure if you’re attracted to someone or just conditioned to believe you should be, comp het can be hard to untangle, but we gotchu. We also dig into: 💕 How the internalized pressure to be straight can complicate dating and self-discovery📺 Real-world examples from pop culture and our lives that illustrate what this is🌎 How everyone is affected by this—not just women or queer folks📚 All of the policing around terms just like this oneA few of the reads we mention this week:Adrienne Rich's milestone 1980 essayThe Lesbian Master DocA few resources: A, B, CCome back every Friday for new episodes, and don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and follow us for more:Email us: [email protected] Follow us: Instagram, TikTokEmail us: [email protected] Follow Meaghan: Instagram, TikTokFollow Sadaf: Instagram, Twitter/X

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