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Everything Happens with Kate Bowler

When Caregiving Becomes Codependency: A Conversation with Elizabeth Gilbert

09 Sep 2025

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When someone you love is in pain—whether they’re sick, addicted, or falling apart—you show up. Again and again and again. You make the calls. You hold the line. You carry what you can. But what happens when love, loyalty, and devotion blur into something harder to name? When care turns into codependency, and compassion starts to erase your sense of self? Kate sits down with best-selling author Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love; Big Magic) to talk about the toll and the tenderness of caregiving. Liz’s new memoir, All the Way to the River, chronicles her years caring for someone she loved deeply through addiction and illness—and what it meant to finally let go. Together, they explore: What it means to walk someone you love to the edge of life How codependence disguises itself as devotion The permission we need to be more than someone’s lifeline This conversation is for anyone who has ever loved to the point of exhaustion. Who wonders if love is meant to cost this much. Who needs a blessing for the moment when helping means losing yourself. 🧡 Listen with care. Leave with permission. Find Kate on Substack.Grab your Everything Happens Merch. Books by Elizabeth Gilbert All the Way to the River – A raw memoir of caregiving, addiction, and release Big Magic – On creativity, inspiration, and the discipline of making Eat, Pray, Love – A bestselling memoir on desire, spirituality, and selfhood The Signature of All Things – A novel of science, wonder, and the search for understanding Resources + Mentions TED Talk: Your Elusive Creative Genius – Liz’s viral TED talk on creative brilliance Alcoholics Anonymous – A spiritual practice of surrender discussed in the episode Sky Cave Retreats – Where Liz spent five days in total darkness See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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