Not All Roman Emperors Are Visible | Claudius (Part 1)
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Who was Claudius and why is he significant in Roman history?
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Welcome back to Finn vs History. Joining me is Horatio Gould. I'm the Emperor. Today we're talking about Claudius. We're back in ancient Rome. These have been some of my favourite episodes.
Yes. We're going back to the ancient world, but these are very much the lily pads in which you feel safe, right? I love the Roman emperors. It's the only place that you feel you can... It's the wall of the ice rink which you can hold on to in the ancient world. It's the only place where I get to explore the ancient world where you're not half asleep or purposely nosediving the podcast.
I don't think that's fair. I think I found a prehistoric statue of a guy doing a Hitler salute.
Yeah, that's true. That really fired me up. That got me through that episode. Yeah, you very much so.
We're talking about Claudius today.
And we're also, sorry, we're dressed as the sofa today.
We are dressed as the sofa. And before anyone comments, I'm aware that there will be a lot of gunt on show in this episode. You're a gun buncher. My gun is bunching in this suit. There's a lot of material in it. I'm essentially dressed as a corduroy curtain. And I apologize to any ladies watching, but my gun is punched.
But it sort of looks like we're like kind of hit men who are trying to hide. In the sofa. In the sofa. We're dressed up as one of the cushions. I mean, I'm dressed as the sofa cushion. You're dressed as the wall.
We're assassins at a Nigerian wedding.
What were the circumstances surrounding Caligula's assassination?
We're going, what are they wearing? We're going to have to dress as they do. Yes, I do. For anyone looking, I've got a lot of room in the fupa. My pussy hair is not as fat as it looks in this suit. But we digress. We need to talk about Claudius. Okay, so we have previously, we've talked about Nero, who is the emperor after Claudius. And we've talked about Caligula. Probably our wildest episode, I'd say, was Caligula. And this episode will be a kind of sequel. It will be, you know,
where are we let's just so this is the emperor claudius is between caligula and nero it's betwixt the mad cunts basically yes caligula and nero are by words for tyranny and um but claudius is kind of the hipster's choice i think so he's my favorite emperor we've looked at so far i think it's a very interesting story it doesn't follow the normal narratives because a lot of roman emperors they're either like chads yes or they're just mental with no real light and shade. It's just, I marry my whore. It's just a zany fucking... Well, I'll fuck you then. Yeah, I fucked everyone's wives. I burn it all down. There's not really any sort of nuance there. It's just full throttle. I'm mental. But Claudius has a lot... His whole life story is very...
It's kind of the most interesting character.
It's a very unique story, actually. I'd say so. Of any ruler, really. But we ended the last episode with Caligula. Now, Caligula had been a promising early leader. He'd been raised on Tiberius, who was Epstein, Epsteinius. Yes. Epstein's Island.
So it's not been a great... Yeah, the track record so far for Epstein.
No, it goes Blair... pedophile, mad cunt, Claudius, mad cunt. Caligula had been assassinated by his Praetorian guard. He'd been a promising ruler, but then he'd had a stroke and the stroke had pushed down on the pedophile bit of his brain and the foreign accent syndrome. So he'd gone to sleep a Caligula, he'd woken up a Carigara, and he was then assassinated by his Praetorian guard.
Because he was fast bowling babies against the wall, was he not?
How did Claudius become emperor despite his disabilities?
No, they then took his baby and they Cambodian cricketed it into a wall. Sorry. Yeah. So, yeah, it's the long road to Pol Pot, bowling babies against trees in Cambodia. They took Caligula's son, they killed his wife, and they take his son and they play squash with it, I think was the term you used. They chucked it at a baby, lights out, night-night.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
Who was Claudius and why is he significant in Roman history?
0:00–1:47
2
What were the circumstances surrounding Caligula's assassination?
1:47–3:49
3
How did Claudius become emperor despite his disabilities?
3:49–6:57
4
What role did the Praetorian Guard play in Claudius’ rise to power?
6:57–8:35
5
What were Claudius' early life challenges and how did they shape him?
8:35–10:08
6
How did Claudius navigate his family dynamics and political intrigue?
10:08–12:48
7
What were the notable achievements and failures of Claudius' reign?
12:48–14:53
8
What can we learn from Claudius' approach to leadership and governance?
14:53–53:28
Speakers
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