Brave Love Great Sex – Couples Therapy Podcast

313: Are You A Good Kisser?

10 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Let’s talk about all things smooches! Types of kissing, “good” and “bad” kissers, what a kiss means to you… Labeling someone as a “good...

312: Forbidden Dark Places – Shame & The Sexual Cycle

03 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Shame and disgust are heavy words that inhabit dark places, but we can't avoid dark places if we want to experience the highs a relationship can provi...

311: All The Feels – Sharing 5 Primary Emotions with Your Partner

26 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Let's talk about five primary emotions: joy, fear, anger, sadness, shame, and disgust – feeling all of them is important, especially with your partn...

310: The 3 Roads of Connection – Is Your Relationship On the Right Path?

19 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Let's use the 3 road analogy to discuss the sexual and emotional cycles: the High, Middle, and Low Roads. Research highlights the importance of naviga...

309: Script For A Sexual Breakthrough!

12 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

EFT (or Emotionally Focused Therapy) walks couples through a de-escalation process, but what sets EFT apart is Stage Two. The second stage of EFT focu...

308: 5 Sexual Initiation Styles – Which Turns You On?

05 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How do you initiate in the bedroom? ;) George and Laurie explore (and joke!) about 5 different initiator styles: Seduction, Touch, Emotional Connectio...

307: The Yin and Yang of Sexual Energy

29 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Both Yin and Yang are needed for our sex lives to flourish. Where do you fall on the spectrum? Partners in relationships can both be dominant in one t...

306: Body Blocks – Moving Past Your Sensory Turnoffs

22 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Touch, smell, sound, taste, vision... Which senses cause you sexual "blocks?" Perhaps touch feels unnatural, painful, or irritating. Maybe you are sel...

305: "Still Face" In Bed – Rethinking Unresponsiveness

15 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Laurie and George discuss the 'still-face' experiments and how that shows up in the bedroom. Still face – a look on our partner's face that spells...

304: Love and Sex – How They Go Together

08 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Sex and emotions—there’s a delicate balance between the two, an overlap that can’t be ignored. Emotions can enhance sex or inhibit sex, and sex ...

303: Sensual Moves from the Movies – 3 Hollywood Tips

01 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What can we learn from Hollywood about balancing sexual 'yin and yang'? In this episode, we'll focus on sensuality as a pure act of giving, and on the...

302: How to Ask Your Partner for Variety in the Bedroom

24 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Want to explore new moves with your partner, but don't know how to ask? How can Pursuers approach and encourage their Withdrawer partner to open their...

301: The #1 Sex Life Destroying Habit & How To Fix It

17 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

All of us have struggles communicating, and these struggles often seep into the bedroom. As sex and couples therapists, we often run into couples who ...

300: The Shared Trauma of 9/11

10 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Where were you on 9/11? We all remember. It's been 20 years. Most of us were stunned, watching the twin towers fall, but George was with the FDNY rus...

299: Vulnerability Can Spice Up A Boring Marriage

10 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Couples who find themselves stuck in the boring and mundane are often couples who have failed to be vulnerable. George uses a three-road analogy to e...

298: Frustrated Pursuers–The Pain of Rejection

03 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We always talk about sexual Pursuers and Withdrawers—those who seek sex and those who withdraw from it. Because sexual Pursuers are usually the sex...

297: When Does Sex Become Compulsive?

27 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It is believed that 3-6% of people in the U.S. struggle with sexual compulsion, all genders can be affected. Sometimes sexual activities become compul...

296: 4 Steps To Romantic Sex!

20 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We talk a lot about romance outside of the bedroom, but what does a romantic interlude look like? “I wish my partner were more romantic in bed” is...

295: How To Talk About Sex While Grieving

13 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, we explore grief through the lens of sexual intimacy... For many couples, sexual intercourse is a safe space where they can be vulner...

294: Red HOT—The Color of Attraction

06 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Q&A episode!!! We're answering a bunch of different questions from our listeners about the science of attraction, faking it, and how to bring sexy bac...

293: It Takes Two to Tango!

30 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We often use the word "tango" in EFT in context of the cycles, patterns, or feedback loop that couples can get stuck in. How do you change that dynami...

292: Healing After An Affair

23 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Affairs devastate the trust and connection in a committed relationship… Although healing after an affair is a delicate process and can feel impossib...

291: What Turns Men On?

16 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We’ve talked about what turns women on… let’s hear about men!! It might not be what you expect... We’re borrowing from Michael Castleman’s ...

290: Turnons and Turnoffs

09 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

All gas, no brakes!! We're using our acronym B.E.S.T. sex to talk about turn ons and turn offs. What works, and what doesn't work. Body, Emotional, Sp...

289: Strengthen Your Erotic Mind

02 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How can you develop your erotic mind? The BRAIN is the best sexual organ we have! Engagement of the mind is important and developing eroticism can bri...

288: New Moves—For Pursuers and Withdrawers

25 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Do you feel stuck in the negative cycle? What's not working? Couples usually understand what’s not working, but not what they could do differently....

287: Hope For A Sexless Marriage?

18 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

When someone is committed to fidelity and their partner absolutely does not want sex—is there any hope? Technically, sexless is considered less tha...

286: What Turns Women On? Female Sexual Cues

11 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What sexual cues turn women on? Here’s a hint—interest is sexy! 32% of women lack sexual interest, according to a research study by Meston & McCal...

285: Q&A: Sexual Crossroads—Breakthrough Or Breakup?

04 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, we’re answering YOUR questions!! We find that the questions can be repetitive because couples are struggling with the same sexual a...

284: 3 Tools for Better Communication—Reflect, Evocative Response, Validate

28 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How can you better approach and communicate with your partner about your feelings and needs? Reflect, Evocative Response, Validate... In this week's ...

283: Finding A Sexual Flow State—Merging As One

21 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Have you experienced a state of “flow” during sex? What is the correlation between flow and sexual satisfaction? A new research study by Jamea, E....

282: 4 Hot Techniques for Female Pleasure—OMGYES Research

14 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are keeping HOT this week! Real talk about female pleasure and the clitoris… Discover new techniques to increase pleasure during sexual intercou...

281: Anal Play - It's Okay If You Want It; It's Okay If You Don't

07 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Anal play, anal penetration, prostate stimulation or anal sex.  While we may feel squeamish about this subject - the anus IS an erogenous zone charge...

280: My Partner Won’t Go Down—How Do We Go On?

30 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Maybe you or your partner is uninterested in or uncomfortable with certain acts, such as oral sex.  Both men and women can resist oral sex. What’s ...

279: 5 Erotic Blueprints—What's Your Sexual Style?

23 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

This week we’re talking about erotic blueprints. Like the 5 love languages—but all about sex! We all have different ways that we get turned on… ...

278: Erectile Dysfunction—Overcoming Anxiety with Vulnerability

16 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Erectile dysfunction is a common issue and can be caused by a number of reasons such as anxiety, age, medication, and physiological issues. The good t...

277: Overcoming Sexual and Emotional Blocks

08 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What are the blocks that keep us from each other?  Withdrawer blocks might look like taking space through laughing, walking away, or being too positi...

276: Longings Fulfilled—When Your Lover Loves You Back

02 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Does your partner feel just outside of your grasp? Are you longing for a deeper physical and emotional connection? Pursuers and withdrawers have diffe...

275: Online Dating—Finding Connection Beyond the Profile

26 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How can you navigate the world of online dating and find a partner with the qualities you’re looking for? How can you avoid wasting time on drama an...

274: How to Have Hot Makeup Sex—Minus the Fight!

19 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Why is makeup sex so hot?! Emotions are so raw in the moment… and anger can be arousing! The passion is mutual and therefore, even hotter! Energy is...

273: Stop the Fight—How to Break the Negative Cycle

12 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Are you always having what feels like the same fight? Does the negative cycle leave you feeling frustrated and angry? Or misunderstood and like you're...

272: Secrets of Her Erotic Mind

04 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Let’s open the door to the erotic mind of a female…What do women fantasize about? What gets them hot? Not just fantasizing in the moment—but ev...

271: Vulnerability—Why Do Men Have a Hard Time Expressing Emotions?

26 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Why do men struggle with expressing their emotions? Often they’ve spent much of their lives learning how to avoid feeling vulnerable at all costs—...

270: 4 Female Inhibitions in Bed – How to Overcome Them

19 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

What are some of the common sexual "blocks" that women experience? Reservations around the idea of sex can come from a number of things – religious ...

269: 5 Ways for Men to Get Their Mojo Back

12 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Pursuers become burned out after being turned down time and time again... This rejection causes them to lose their confidence and be more cautious. Ho...

268: Sex on the Table: How to Respond to a Pursuer's Request

05 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

When sexual pursuers make attempts to initiate sex, they are coming from a good place-- but their method of delivery may not be the best.   When ...

267: The Gleam in Their Eye Makes Us Hot

29 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In early dating years our partner’s face lights up at the thought of sex, they tell us with their eyes that we make them hot. The gleam in their eye...

266: Anxiety is a Sex Killer - Gain Confidence with Playfulness

22 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Have you lost your confidence in bed? Anxiety is a sex killer. Whether it’s anxiety over your performance, being vulnerable, being naked, expectatio...

265: Do You Have Sex on Her Period?

15 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

How do you feel about having sex during your/her period? There can be a negative connotation to intercourse during a woman's menstrual cycle that goe...

264: Premature Ejaculation - How to Last Longer

08 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Premature ejaculation is very common, but also very treatable. It can be caused by a number of things such as performance anxiety, biological factors,...

263: Sizzling Resolutions

01 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Jump into 2021 with a sense of direction for your relationship! Join sex therapist Laurie Watson and couples therapist George Faller as they talk abou...

262: Making the Most of the Holidays

24 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The point of the holidays is to share love and connection! It's also a great time to spur meaningful conversations! Set aside time to ask each other ...

261: The 5 Love Languages of Christmas

18 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The holidays are busy for everyone! But you can't forget to make time for your partner... Let's talk about the 5 love languages and ways to express yo...

260: The Madonna/Whore Split

11 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Originally identified by Freud, the “madonna/whore complex” is the inability to maintain sexual arousal in committed, long-term relationships. It ...

259: What To Do With A Hot-Tempered Man

04 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Women who have felt or seen their partner’s anger will not be able to feel his erotic vibe.  Sexual pursuers can become demanding when their partne...

258: Variety - To Spice Up The Bedroom

27 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This one comes at you fast! George and Laurie talk through a variety of sex acts that couples choose to liven things up. No judgements just a curious ...

257: Intersection of Emotional and Sexual Cycles

20 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

How can you and your partner align your emotional and sexual cycles?  We can be on different planets sometimes when it comes to these cycles, but wh...

256: Desire versus Willingness

13 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Can willingness replace desire? Are you wanting or just willing to have sex? Sometimes willingness can mean being vulnerable and communicating with yo...

255: Mailbag! Unrequited Sexual Fantasies, When to Compromise and Being Vulnerable

06 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mailbag!! George and Laurie answer questions from the Foreplay Fam in this week’s episode! They’re talking all about unrequited fantasies, comprom...

254: Low Libido Joe

30 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

What should a woman think about a man who doesn't initiate sex much and doesn't even seem to want it?  She wonders if he's even attracted to her. Lau...

253: Resilient Sex - The Female Sexual Pursuer

23 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

What does resilient sex look like in a female? George and Laurie take another look at how a different woman - a sexual pursuer - might answer question...

252: Sex During COVID (Still)

16 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sex during COVID (still!) - while kids are home, while we're stir-crazy, closeness is feeling claustrophobic; and we've got the big sex killer - stres...

251: Setting Up An Early Relationship for Sex Success

09 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Thinking about getting married and want to make sure sex is good and you stay emotionally connected? Never had these important conversations about bas...

250: Do Creams, Meds, Pills, Gadgets, and Toys Really Help Her in Bed?

02 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

George and Laurie talk with Dr. Polly Watson, MD (no relation!) about all the new exciting advances in sex medicine to find out what helps. We discuss...

249: Closing the Arousal Gap

25 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

With the average Joe and average Jane so different in their approach to sex and the ways and timing of arousal, what can a couple do to close the arou...

248: Sexual Self Improvement Plan for Her

18 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week it is Average Jane's turn! Join sex therapist and author Dr. Laurie Watson and couples therapist George Faller as they talk about what the s...

247: 12 Ways To Get Better In Bed For Guys

11 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

George wants men to have a method to improve their sexual game in 3 zones—pre-sex, during sex and post-sex in 4 different areas: heart, mind, body, ...

246: Ask a Sexual Question and Get "I don't know" For An Answer - What to Do?

04 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

As a sexual pursuer, how can you open a conversation with your sexually withdrawing partner? What are some typical questions that pursuers ask and how...

245: The Killjoy Cycle

28 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Let's talk about “killjoy” – the negative cycle that squashes the love life is so many millions of couples out there and how we can name it, not...

244: Orgasm Gap and How Big is Big Enough?

21 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Is the orgasm gap fair? Laurie and George don't think so. But it's so natural to feel criticized when your partner tries to tell you what they need; h...

243: Why Do YOU Want To Have Sex? Five Motives For Sex!

14 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Why do YOU want to have sex? George and I talk about the 5 most frequent motives to get it on! Pleasure, Intimacy, Approval, Coping and Procreation. E...

242: Come as you are with Emily Nogaski

07 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome Dr. Emily Nagoski, PhD, fellow podcaster and award-winning author of the New York Times bestseller, Come As You Are: the surprising new scienc...

241: What Withdrawers Can Do Besides Walking Away

31 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Knowing that their withdrawal triggers their partner, what can someone who feels attacked or criticized do - other than walking away? Wrestling with t...

240: Do Men Really Want Directions In Bed?

24 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Men want an engaged partner and frequently ask for communication in bed.  Yet, how can a women ask for what she wants without sending the message tha...

239: Two Ways Pursuers Can Calm Down & Love Their Withdrawing Partner

17 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Pursuers have beautiful motives to push toward their partners - wanting more connection, more intimacy and more sex. But they often feel rejected and ...

238: Four Sexy Questions

10 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's so hard to ask for what I want in bed or how to answer what do you want me to do to you sexually. Why? George says we either want to protect our ...

237: 49 Year-Old Virgin and Other Mailbag Questions

03 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Mailbag! - A 49 year-old virgin wonders if it too late for love or if she has lost her mojo. George and Laurie discuss having hard conversations about...

236: You Excite Me -- Seeing Your Partner as Sexy

26 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

When we are falling in love, we notice all the positive attractors in our partner. Over time, the inevitable negatives which were there all along beco...

235: I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt -- Getting Sexual Confidence

18 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We all resonate with how sexy confidence is in the bedroom. But how do we get it back when we've been repeatedly rejected? Or how do we love ourselves...

234: Rooting Out Racism

11 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

George and Laurie add their hearts to the conversation about racism. We need to have the conversations that are uncomfortable. If we're marginalized, ...

233: She Only Wants Sex to Keep Him Happy

04 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Join us for a sample conversation with "Eleanor" who is always anxious about sex, preoccupied with whether or not she is pleasing her husband, but una...

232: Talking to a Man About His Sex Life

28 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Conversation is the best foreplay. But to have a deeper, more satisfying relationship you must ask deeper, specific questions. Have you ever wanted to...

231: Sharing Your Sexual History - Assessment Part 2

21 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

In therapy and in our partnerships, sharing our sexual histories takes vulnerability and courage. Have you told your partner about your sexual develop...

230: How to Assess Your Present Sexual Relationship

14 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We invite you into a thoughtful reflection about what is happening in YOUR sex life. Bring your spirit of curiosity and stay with us in the discovery ...

229: Sex During Hunkering Down

07 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The stay-at-home orders across the country because of the Covid-19 Pandemic has increased the economic and health security. Dealing with feelings of h...

228: Male Arousal -- What Turns Him On

30 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

What turns him on? Visual stimulation is very important. Seeing his partner naked works if women can let go of their insecurity.  Join sex therapist ...

227: Overcoming Shame in Sex

23 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

A married woman listener asks George and Laurie about how to overcome 15 years of shame regarding her thoughts about the 'right kind of sex to have', ...

226: Do Women Enjoy Sex?

17 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

In this Mailbag episode, a listener raises a question about given the difficulty many women have in orgasming through intercourse, why would women wan...

225: De-escalating Conflicts

09 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The Pursuer - Withdrawer dance can escalate negative emotions and lead to misunderstanding what each partner is wanting, thinking, and feeling. Join s...

224: Connecting During Covid

02 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

STAY CONNECTED! - our most important mission during the COVID-19 outbreak! In times of stress we need to turn to each other. George and Laurie talk ab...

223: I'm a Burned-out Pursuer

26 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Pursuers get exhausted. After trying everything... talking, begging,  holding back their needs, getting angry... sometimes they just give up.  When ...

222: Let's Talk About Sex, Baby!

19 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Laurie and George demonstrate best ways to initiate a conversation to get your partner to open up about sex. And secondly, they talk about how to chan...

221: Do 2 Withdrawers Ever Get Together?

12 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Do 2 withdrawers ever get together?  They do but when there is little conflict there is usually little sex.  Both people are so intent on being nice...

220: Affairs - Different Reasons Pursuers/Withdrawers Cheat

06 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Why would a withdrawer have an affair when their partner is begging them for more connection? How can a pursuer get over their shame to see their part...

219: Forgiveness After an Affair

28 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Affairs devastate the trust and connection in a committed relationship. Recovery and reconnection is possible. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Wa...

218: Stress and Sex

21 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Nothing more sexy than talking about stress! How we perceive stress is how it impacts our body and which makes it inseparable from sex. Connection wit...

217: Men Who Don't Go Down

14 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

One of the big disappointments for some women is when their partners don't want to do cunnilingus with them and they do. Join sex therapist and author...

216: Masturbation -- We All Do It

07 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Masturbation is a topic few couples are comfortable talking about; yet it is something that we all do. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and...

215: Sexual Fantasies - What Do You Want?

31 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Most fantasies have the theme of someone being so into you. In our fantasy, our partner is showing high levels of engagement, high levels of passion a...

214: Healing Childhood Sexual Trauma

24 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sexual trauma in childhood can wreak havoc on adult emotional and sexual relationships. While challenging, traumas of this gravity can be healed. Join...