Glen Reads Gothic Horror (to you)

'Much Ado About Nothing' by William Shakespeare - Act 4

03 Jul 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: The dad asks the audience for a knife so he can kill himself Apparently, when someone passes out, it’s normal to ask “oh, are you passi...

'Much Ado About Nothing' by William Shakespeare - Act 3

18 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Everyone is an idiot don’t take the part where you can ruin a woman’s life seriously enough to question the bastard Being a cop has alw...

'Much Ado About Nothing' by William Shakespeare - Act 2

02 Jun 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Claudio is a spaz, Don John basically wants people dead and people are tricked into liking each other. Great. Go on, read it for yourself: h...

'Much Ado About Nothing' by William Shakespeare - Act 1

19 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: If a child-servant wants to get married to a woman he’s barely spoken to, men fall all over themselves to make that happen. . Go on, read ...

'Softie' by Noel Loomis

12 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: You can be a sensi-poo piss-baby and still be respected by alpha males? . Go on, read it for yourself: https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/6968...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 9

05 May 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Nick might be gay? But still doesn't stop him from being a huge jerk. There’s a huge review of this book at the end. This was a book recom...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 8

28 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: You got a dead Gatsby, and a fussed Nick who pretends he didn’t like him anyway. This was a book recommended by my friend- go check him ou...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 7

18 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Have you ever got stuck at a couple’s house while they argue? Did you like it? Then you will LOVE this. This was a book recommended by my ...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 6

10 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Daisy is a turd, Tom is a turd, Gatsby is a turd so I guess we like Nick? This was a book recommended by my friend- go check him out: verisi...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 5

03 Apr 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: This author makes up words that are probably anti-semitic. This was a book recommended by my friend- go check him out: verisimilitudino.us G...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 4

27 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: That this book is anti-semetic. Surprise, surprise. This was a book recommended by my friend- go check him out: verisimilitudino.us Go on, r...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 3

20 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: The chapter actually ends with the protagonist saying he’s the most moral person ever. This was a book recommended by my friend- go check ...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 2

06 Mar 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: When it came to physical abuse in the 20s, the only concern anyone had when a man hit a woman is that they have to call it a night. This was...

'The Great Gatsby' by F. Scott Fitzgerald - Ch 1

13 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Reading a book recommended to me 2 years ago by https://verisimilitudino.us/@baki We learn: Its basically the first season of Vanderpump Rules. This w...

Conan: ‘The Tower of the Elephant’ by Robert Ervin Howards

06 Feb 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Once you know an author is racist, it’s all you think about while you read this crap. Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p...

‘Conan: The Phoenix on the Sword' by Robert Ervin Howards

31 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

I can’t believe that I’m going to say a sword and sorcery book is boring. But I am. Because it is. Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.o...

'Winnie-the-pooh' Ch 9 & 10 by A. A. Milne

24 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Its just more whimsey. What did you expect? It was written for kids. Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/winnie-the-po...

'Winnie-the-pooh' Ch 7 & 8 by A. A. Milne

18 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

The only thing to be learned in these chapters is: Whimsy . Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/winnie-the-pooh-classic-gift-edi...

'Winnie-the-pooh' Ch 5 & 6 by A. A. Milne

12 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Never trust a flesh God . Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/p/books/winnie-the-pooh-classic-gift-edition-a-a-milne/1208585...

'Winnie-the-pooh' Ch 3 & 4 by A. A. Milne

05 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

If you see your friends severed arm in the woods, don’t make it into a door knocker. At some point you have to take responsibility for your decision...

'Winnie-the-pooh' Ch 1 & 2 by A. A. Milne

01 Jan 2023

Contributed by Lukas

No romance section in the master bedroom for you this time- this is a kids book. Instead, I take you to the 'snuggle closet'. . Go on, read it for you...

'The Assistant' by Tiffany Reisz

27 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Where I can finally read about a REALISTIC sexy party. Go on, read it for yourself: https://www.tiffanyreisz.com/the-assistant Visit https://www.nuzzl...

'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens - Ch 5

24 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

I'm done. This will teach me to never stray from the source material: 1983's 'Mickey's Christmas Carol' . Go on, read it for yourself: https://booksh...

'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens - Ch 4

21 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I still hate rich kids The ghost of Christmas Future was just a prank by the other ghosts This book could have ended by now, but we gotta l...

'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens - Ch 3

19 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Charles Dickens had a rough childhood Dickens must have written with a thesaurus next to him to increase that word count My kid shows up to...

'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens - Ch 2

16 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Varicose veins in someone’s legs can look like they’re ‘winking’ at you I’ve just started burping while I read words. It’s a ne...

'A Christmas Carol' by Charles Dickens - Ch 1

12 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

I figured I should read this at some point in my life. It's pretty much what you think it would be. . Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.o...

'Judgement on Janus’ CH 16 17 & 18 by Andre Norton

04 Dec 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: That apparently people who are into Anime LOVE legs I was upbeat about finishing the story, until I had to keep reading it I vow to never r...

'Judgement on Janus’ CH 13 14 & 15 by Andre Norton

27 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: My 'fun fact' really killed the vibe of the episode This story is sapping the life out of me, I can't even get horny anymore I'm desperate ...

'Judgement on Janus’ CH 10 11 & 12 by Andre Norton

23 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I Go off on a long rant about Twitter Desperate to finish this turd, I read 3 chapters Longest episode ever. Go on, read it for yourself: ...

'Judgement on Janus’ CH 8 & 9 by Andre Norton

11 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I really can't stand this book I got to tell a Charles DICKens joke thanks to grunge.com This book just keeps creating new sci-fi words and...

'Judgement on Janus' CH 6 & 7 by Andre Norton

05 Nov 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I REALLY hate reading this book I never get used to ridiculous 1960s sci-fi names Both daughter and wife INTERRUPT ME . Go on, read it for...

'John Charrington’s Wedding' by E. Nesbit

23 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I almost forgot to talk about seeing a satanic Do-wop band last week. E. Nesbit kinda sucked I don’t like Jerry Seinfeld . Go on, read i...

'The Spook House' by Ambrose Bierce

16 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Apparently all the ‘fun facts’ can be found in the Wikipedia page My daughter is a better host than me My kid will bust in while I’m ...

'The Specter Bride' by William Harrison Ainsworth

06 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: I’m married! Just like the people in this story. My 26 year old cat is dying. So that puts a damper on things. This story doesn’t reall...

'Judgement on Janus’ - CH 4 & 5 by Andre Norton

06 Oct 2022

Contributed by Lukas

We learn: Thanks to the Canadian Spirit Podcast (@spirit_canadian on twitter) we learned what “Gentlehomo—” means "Gentle Homo sapiens&quo...

'Judgement on Janus’ - CH 2 & 3 by Andre Norton

08 Sep 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes We learn: Apparently “Gentlehomo—” is a term that was made up for this bookI start playing old commercials from the ‘80s because...

Judgement on Janus - CH 1

22 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes We learn: Kids always get in the waySci-Fi novels always have the worst namesGertie decides to turn my smoking room into a sewing room ....

‘Peter Pan’ by J. M. Barrie Chapter 6

10 Aug 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:The author is a horrible pedophile who ruined the lives of the kids he abducted. So I’m giving up on this book.My girlfriend g...

‘Peter Pan’ by J. M. Barrie Chapter 5

24 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:That you can just steal food out of a birds mouth and everyone is friends in the end.Everything is racist all the timeThe lost b...

‘Peter Pan’ by J. M. Barrie Chapter 4

19 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn: That you can just steal food out of a birds mouth and everyone is friends in the end.I had to work fast- the bachelorette is on...

‘Peter Pan’ by J. M. Barrie Chapter 3

13 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:I went back to the mansionNothing STILL makes any senseIf a fairy pees in your hand… you can use it.. . Go on, read it for you...

‘Peter Pan’ by J. M. Barrie Chapter 2

03 Jul 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:Learn more about how to fight against the Supreme Court's decision by visiting https://www.podvoices.help/get-helpI went back to...

‘Peter Pan’ Chapter 1

18 Jun 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:Nothing makes sense in this chapterThis author might actually NOT be a dickDisney was a dick, and his company didn’t get bette...

'The Preposterously Unlikely Plight of Lucious The Lama' by spookybookiwrite

08 Jun 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:Lama’s CAN be racistSnipers can be anywhere at any timeSometimes you just gotta go where the waters take you. . Go on, read it...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 10' by Carolie Farr

21 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThe final chapter was only TWO PAGES . .We learn:Two pages can STILL count as a chapterMost authors are racist, apparentlyI’m running o...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 9

15 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWho says you can't have your story arc at the second to last chapter of a book.. .We learn:East coast people can't handle a tornadoMy Dad...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 8

07 May 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesA whole chapter dedicated to a woman trying to prove that she's not just 'having a bad dream' when being almost murdered.. .We learn:I'm ...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 7

30 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesIt's the '70s. If a woman has something to say they're 'hysterical' and probably get slapped.. .We learn:That Bram Stoker was a Q-anon we...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 6

23 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhere we learn that a man can 'be known' for 'appreciating women' and you can commission a portrait of someone without their consent.. .W...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 5

17 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhere my daughter interrupts AGAIN- and nearly nothing happens in the story.. .We learn:Italy was FINE.My daughter learns the horrible se...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - Ch 4

10 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThey FINALLY take a tour of the torture chamber and a woman may, or may not, have consented to the hosts kink.Plus both my kids interrupt...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - CH 3

03 Apr 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe witness the 'help' having secret sex nights. Plus my daughter makes another appearance in the MIDDLE of my SHOW to talk about what she...

‘Castle of Terror’ by Caroline Farr - Ch 1 & 2

28 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesI read the first two chapters of a gothic horror which is all about a woman getting hit on by some guy she met at horse camp.We learn:You...

‘The Dinner Guest’ by Brandon Faircloth

20 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes We learn: I'm going to Italy and still don't have much to say about it.It's impossible to get 'fun facts' about authors lately.something...

‘Curse of the Evil Faries Fort’ & ‘Flesh on the Grill’ by Drac Von Stoller

13 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/books/31-horrifying-tales-from-the-dead/9781540800541\ . Watch some of Drac's movies! ...

'Tying the Knot' by Tiffany Reisz

06 Mar 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:I have nothing intelligent to add when it comes to Russia’s war with UkraineIf the author decides to sue me for reading this p...

'Piggly Wiggly' by Anonymous

27 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:The author won’t give out his nameI haven’t seen this guys face in 20 yearsHe threw big words at me like a JERK.Go on, read ...

'Anything I want, I can pull from a hole in the side of my head' by AliasForWhom

21 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:Tom Holland is America’s favorite British actorMysterious, living authors are making my show intro awkwardIf I could go back i...

'Misunderstanding' by Evelyn Michaels

13 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:The only things going on in my life lately are NONE of your BUSINESSBesides that, my life is really, really boring latelyI have ...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 14 & 15

06 Feb 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:I got the booster shot, and I’m waiting for those sweet, sweet fever naps.Starving a dog isn't enough, you need to put fire in...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 13

31 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe learn:Someone decided that Holmes has a 190 IQStapleton’s sister is actually his wifeCircumstantial evidence is ‘good enough’.Go...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 12

12 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhen a felon dies in the woods, apparently everyone is happy about it. .Go on, read it for yourself: https://bookshop.org/books/the-hound...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 10 - 11

01 Jan 2022

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesMore literary crutches like ‘diary entries’ and a pervert on a roof watching kids through a telescope.Go on, read it for yourself: ht...

Chapter 9 of 'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle

08 Dec 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesIf you have a secret, and someone asks you what it is- Just lie! Don't say, "I don't want to tell you." Just reference some porn you watc...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 8

29 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesNothing happens. Watson writes a letter to Holmes basically making a 'clip show' of the last chapter..Go on, read it for yourself: https:...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 7

08 Nov 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesStapleton is a monster who LOVES watching horses drown in the bog while he chases after moths. What a dick. Also, my daughter interrupts ...

'Zero Hour' by Ray Bradbury

31 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesA story about what happens when you let kids play with knives and openly talk about killing adults. Happy Halloween people. .Go on, read ...

'Hallowe'en at Merryvale' by Alice Hale Burnett

20 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWe are introduced to a world where kids have horrible nicknames like "Frog", and just "Fat" - and adults have questionable motivations fo...

'Castle Drac Von Stoller' & 'Death in the Wilderness' by Drac Von Stoller

14 Oct 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes Starting my spooky October stories with the master of horror- Drac Von Stoller. One story about an army of vampires to take over the wor...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 5 & 6

29 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesBen's got Covid. So we didn't record the Book Boys, and I had to poop out this emergency episode. Lets review what happens:Chapter 5? Not...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 3 & 4

20 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesJust looking worse, we find out that Sherlock Holmes is a fan of Phrenology. And he's constantly trying to be better than everyone else. ...

'The Hound of the Baskervilles' by Arthur Conan Doyle - CH 1 & 2

13 Sep 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhere Sherlock Holmes is a jerk to everyone he talks to. Books like this make me fussed.We also learn that my new dog won't stop secretin...

'Campfire Tales' by Drac Von Stoller

30 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes The story of a group of weirdos that are just looking to get killed. I mean, seriously, they all have sing-alongs with someone playing a...

'A Mother's Arms' by Sarina Dorie

16 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesAn octopus finds new purpose in life by forcing a human to be it's baby.Go on, read it for yourself:https://www.amazon.com/Wont-You-Neigh...

'A Mate Not A Meal' by Sarina Dorie

09 Aug 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThe story of a spider who wants love, but in the end has to settle for 'good enough'.Go on, read it for yourself: https://www.amazon.com/...

'Day of the Nuptial Flight' by Sarina Dorie

27 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThe story of a space hornet that just wanted to mate, and sorta gets what he wants.Go on, read it for yourself: https://www.amazon.com/Wo...

'My Curse, My Flavor Town' a Guy Fieri creepy pasta by JordanRotten13

12 Jul 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThe story of a simple man carrying on the tradition of taking on the role of becoming the new Guy Fieri. And there's a giant Burrito that...

'Cocaine' by Pendleton King

28 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesA hypocritical Nora decides that they need to kill themselves. And after being called a chicken, Joe is all in. Then they don't when it's...

'Facing Death' by August Strindberg

21 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesMisunderstood and whiny, a man decides he'd rather kill himself than find a new line of work or get his kids to like him for who he is.My...

'Planchette' & 'A Visit from the Greys (Aliens)' by Drac Von Stoller

14 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThis week I check in with an author I've read before by reading about greedy teens who search for a haunted ouija board, and a greedy fam...

'Bringing the Heat' by Tiffany Reisz

10 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhat starts out as a boring date for Jada at a minor league baseball game, turns into the most graphic MLM Jada has ever peeped on. Just ...

Warrior-Maid of Mars by Alfred Coppel - P2

08 Jun 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesOur man is tricked into thinking he had a successful escape, then he fights his nemesis, and decides that rain is key to his conquering t...

Warrior-Maid of Mars by Alfred Coppel

31 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesI decide to declare war against the Ladies Fright Podcast, because I TALK NORMAL. Then the 'short story' I'm reading is the longest thing...

Chapter 23 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

17 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWell, I'm back on this book again. We learn that David gets a new job. He gets a sweet pad in London. And Mr. Dick was right, there's mor...

'Confessions of the Orgasm Fairy' by Sarina Dorie

13 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesA heart-warming story about how working hard can make all your dreams come true.About the AuthorSarina Dorie has sold over 170 short stor...

'The Little Prince' Part 2 - by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

10 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes What do you do when wanda over at the 'From Words to Ideas" podcast gives you a story that is impossibly sad, and the turds at the 'Ladi...

'The Little Prince' Part 1 - by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

06 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode Notes What do you do when your plane crashes and you're trying to get home and some kid starts talking about a fussy flower on his planet? You...

‘Ponies’ by kij johnson

01 May 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesWhat would you give up to finally be popular? Would you give up your pony? You’ll learn what sacrifice means in this episode.Go on, rea...

Chapter 22 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

27 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesDavid STILL can't get over his man-crush, and Dickens clearly doesn't like small people. All this and a neighbor with a vague sexual issu...

'The Egg' by Andy Weir

23 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Episode NotesThe story of a man who dies and realizes he's god.. and you. And me? I don't like him being me.Go on, read it for yourself: http://www.ga...

'A Country Doctor' by Franz Kafka

20 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Like Taylor Swift, Kafka seemed to love writing about his failing relationships. Especially if he thought he was being cheated on.The romance corner b...

'The Intoxicated' by Shirley Jackson

15 Apr 2021

Contributed by Lukas

I decided to take a break from 'David Copperfield' this week because I miss feeling inadequate and un-cool around teens. Lucky for me, Shirley Jackson...

Chapter 21 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

30 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

In this chapter, we learn:David is thinks he's nailed acting older than he really is... until he meets Steerforth's butler, Littimer.Steerforth take o...

Chapter 20 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

25 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

David can't stop being in love with Steerforth. Nothing will stop this obsession. He goes to Steerforth's house and learns that he's a brat that threw...

Chapter 19 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

18 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

David finishes school and is trying to find a career so he's going back to where the actions- Yarmouth. He makes his rounds to say goodbye to everyone...

Ch 18 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

16 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We suddenly get the narration point of view of David when he's really, really old for some reason. He thinks back fondly of all the women he was hot f...

Ch 17 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

11 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Mr, Dick starts hanging around David's school (which someone should have been concerned about) but he's so lovable that even Dr. Strong hangs out with...

Ch 16 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

04 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

David goes to his new school and meets the headmaster, Dr. Strong and Annie (a much younger woman) that Dr. Strong is married to (eeew).David and the ...

Ch 15 of 'David Copperfield' by Charles Dickens

02 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Right when David is making BFF's with Mr. Dick, he's forced to live with ANOTHER family while he goes to school in Canterbury. This family has a kid w...