From Dull to Dynamic: How Passion and Authenticity Make You Magnetic to Women, Featuring John R. Miles
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What is the life-changing power of facing your fear?
What that taught me was that so oftentimes we fear the unknown and we don't put ourselves out there to go after what we want.
Welcome back to the How to Get a Girlfriend podcast. I'm your host, dating coach and author, Connell Barrett. I'm here to help you confidently flirt with women and find a great romantic partner. And of course, do this with authenticity. No games, no weird pickup moves. This is about being your best true self. And I have a very special guest for this episode. This episode is all about how to live a life of passion, how that can make you more fulfilled and also make you more attractive to your future girlfriend and your next date. Because I can speak from experience here, women are very attracted to a man who has a lot of passion in his life. My guest today is a bestselling author. His name is John R. Miles.
a former US Navy officer, a Fortune 50 executive, and host of a great podcast called Passion Struck, which has millions of downloads and is one of the top 100 podcasts on Apple. He helps people live passion-driven lives. He has a great new book out. It's excellent. I've been listening to it on Audible. It's called Passion Struck, 12 Powerful Principles to Unlock Your Purpose and Ignite Your Most Intentional Life. You can get it on Amazon, on Audible, and you can also get it in the show notes here. I'm going to link to the Kindle version here in our show notes. John, welcome to the How to Get a Girlfriend podcast.
Hey, Connell. Thank you so much for having me. Such an honor to be on your show.
My pleasure. And I'd love to start with a quote from your book. Whenever I have an author on, I love to read back something that resonated with me. And at the end of your first chapter, I'm listening to it yesterday at the gym, and you say, quote, Fear... I'm sorry, let me rephrase that. You say, quote, will fear arise with sharpened blades ready to attack? Absolutely. While it's normal to be afraid, even when we feel ready, when we face our fears with passion, perseverance, and intentionality, we will see that there really wasn't much to fear. I love that. Can you share a little bit more about the power of facing fear and then understanding that usually there's nothing to be afraid of?
Yeah, you know, part of that quote actually came from me studying Hilary Swank. And it's interesting when you look back at her career. And I had originally meant to focus more on her in the book. I talk about her a few times throughout it. But her life, people don't really know the back story that before she made it big in Boys Don't Cry, for which she only was paid like $3,500, she lived for a very long time out of a minivan of sorts, just trying to do odd ends. And what that taught me was that so oftentimes we fear the unknown and we don't put ourselves out there to go after what we want. And she's a great I think example of someone who stepped into her sharp edges, the sharpness of that fear and utilized it to go after what she truly wanted. And then when she had her opportunity, she went for broke on it and it transformed not only her life, but the lives of millions now who've watched her in different movies. So I think when it comes to fear,
We tend to be our own visionary arsonists in our own life, meaning we arson the very things that we want to build and it's that fear, just like an arsonist, that fuels this, I guess, overwhelming self-belief system that we're not good enough imposter syndrome, whatever you might want to call it, but we can't attain the things that we're setting out in life to achieve. And so this whole book that I wrote is really about how do you break down those barriers with a formula that I've come up with to let go of that fear so that you can pursue those things that instill the most desire, fulfillment, whatever you want to call it, hope in where you want your life to be in the future.
Okay, in a minute, I'm going to ask you to share what that formula is in your book, Passion Struck. First, I want to ask you if there are any memories from your past, moments when fear arose with sharpened blades. It could be a moment that fear got the better of you and won that day, or maybe a moment when you had to step into that fear and defeat the fear, and you...
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the life-changing power of facing your fear?
0:00–7:16
2
Why is self-doubt the true enemy for men?
7:16
3
How can you get unstuck and start living a passionate life?
6:16–7:26
4
What are powerful new behaviors that can become daily habits?
7:26–7:48
5
How should you talk to women with passion on dates?
7:48–11:46
6
What lessons can we learn from loss and gratitude?
11:46–14:22
7
How can you show a woman you’re dating that she truly matters?
14:22–16:48
8
What fun improv game can help you connect with women?
16:48–54:32
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from How to Get a Girlfriend with Connell Barrett
7 Texting Mistakes that Make Women Flake Before the First Date (and 7 Easy Fixes)
8 Flirty Things to Say (and Not to Say) When You Freeze Up Around Women
The 10 Most Surprisingly Sexy Things to Say on a First Date
The 7 Lies that Keep You From Approaching—and 7 Tips to Confidently Talk to Women Anywhere
The 10 Texting Commandments: How to Stop Getting Ghosted and Start Getting Dates
21 Flirty Ways to Make Her Feel Authentic Attraction (How to Escape the Friend Zone, Part 2)